


The best mistake

by smkkbert



Series: There goes my life [1]
Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: Bullying, F/M, High School AU, Teenage Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-15
Updated: 2016-08-26
Packaged: 2018-06-08 15:46:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 79,655
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6861253
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smkkbert/pseuds/smkkbert
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>High School AU: Oliver Queen, captain of the football team and best known party guy in school, and Felicity, straight A student with the most promising future, are secretly dating when two pink lines change everything for them. Once the most important decision is made, the real struggle begins.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Cover by @keyrabadwolf (tumblr)

“Has this been a good idea, or has this been a good idea?”

Felicity chuckled with a slight shake of her head, and dipped another one of fries into her milkshake, feeling the eyes of the others on her when she lifted the food to her lips and pushed it into her mouth.

“That really is disgusting,” Nyssa said, screwing up her face.

“You will learn to like it, too,” Felicity said with a chuckle. “It took me until now to like it though I wonder why it took me so long because it really is yummy. You should try it!”

“Over my dead body am I ever going to try that,” Nyssa replied, pulling her head back when Felicity held out another one of her milkshake dipped fries out for her. “I think it has to be some weird thing in your DNA that makes all three of you like that.”

“But we don’t share DNA,” Felicity objected. “I mean Laurel and Sara of course-“

“Don’t change the subject,” Sara hastily said before her stepsister could work herself up into one of the babbles she was known for and that she knew couldn’t be stopped once they had started. “Honesty, say it has been a good idea to come here with us instead of spending another Friday night alone in the library.”

Felicity sighed, knowing Sara wouldn’t give up on it before she had said it, so nodding her head, Felicity admitted defeat and said with another quiet sigh, “You’re right. It _has_ been a good idea. It’s fun spending time with you guys.”

“And we are very glad that you joined us,” Laurel replied with a smile. She cast a short glance at Sara and Nyssa, who looked at each other amorously, before she turned back to Felicity and added in a whisper, “And I am not just saying that because without you I permanently feel like the third wheel.”

Chuckling, Felicity dipped another one of her fries into her milkshake and pushed it into her mouth. She didn’t miss how Nyssa still screwed up her face at the sight, and Felicity couldn’t help but feel amused and unusually comfortable.

Sara really had had a good idea when she had suggested hanging out together. It had been awhile since Felicity had spent time with her stepsisters outside from their home or school. With the finals coming closer, though closer was still some months away, Felicity had just preferred spending her time in the library to learn which, like her stepsisters had pointed out perfectly clear, wouldn’t make the A she’d get anyway any better.

Admittedly, this evening still wasn’t the best to meet with Laurel, Sara and Nyssa given that Felicity had actually had other plans, but she hadn’t been able to say no to Sa-

“Earth to Felicity,” Nyssa said, flicking her fingers in front of Felicity’s face until she blinked a few times and shook her head to get rid of her thoughts. “Come on, the library can’t be that good that even when you’re physically not there, you’re still there.”

Before Felicity got the chance to answer, the door to the café swung open and a crowd of people came in, singing and laughing loudly. Felicity didn’t have to turn around and see them to know who those people were. She knew the rhythmic slogans. They had been sung everywhere in and around school the entire week given the very important game there had been earlier tonight.

“At least there is no football team in the library,” Nyssa said, rolling her eyes at the crowd of classmates.

“A clear advantage of the library,” Sara agreed, nodding her head.

Felicity watched Sara looking at what she assumed from the voices she heard was the football team of their school joint by some of the cheerleaders and people from their school who had watched the game.

They had shortly thought about going to watch the game before coming here, too, but neither of them had really been in the mood to do so. It had been quite cold and raining, and they just weren’t that much of a fan to risk getting a cold only to watch a game they had already been sure the team would win. So far they had won every game this year.

“I still don’t get how you could have been in love with Tommy Merlyn,” Sara said after awhile, looking at Laurel. “I mean… Tommy Merlyn of all people.”

Laurel glanced over her shoulder where Felicity, who kept her eyes straight on the fries she dipped into her milkshake before eating them, feeling weirdly obsessed about this food, knew Tommy had to be. She could hear him reading out the first online articles about the game with loud voice, making fun of the other team and some people on it in particular. He also mentioned that they should definitely celebrate their last success, and the tone in his voice didn’t leave any doubt for Felicity that his way of celebrating the won game preferably included his new cheerleader girlfriend in his bed.

When Laurel turned back around, she shrugged her shoulders, saying as casually as possible, “Tommy can be different.”

“You okay?” Felicity asked quietly.

When she and her mom had moved to Starling City at the beginning of the year before, Laurel and Tommy had just broken up, and apparently that had been a big thing. So actually one of the first things she had learned in school had been never to date a football player because if you did and you broke up, you would most likely end up on the top of the list of subjects for school gossip, and that was going to be very distracting and annoying.

“Tommy and I broke up a long time ago,” Laurel just answered, shrugging her shoulders once more. “And I might actually soon have a date with Ted Grant.”

“Really?” Sara asked. “Why didn’t you tell us before?”

“It’s not like I hid it for months, Sara,” Laurel answered. “He just asked me out, and I am not even sure if I want to go out with him.”

“Why?” Sara asked immediately. “Ted is hot, and he is-“

“I don’t want to interrupt you,” Nyssa said, of course interrupting Sara nonetheless, “but did you notice that Oliver Queen is looking at us like every thirty seconds?”

“Really? I-“

“Again!” Nyssa called out, frowning. “He looks at us every few seconds. It’s kind of strange.”

“Maybe he is- hey, where are you going?” Sara asked when Felicity got up.

“I’ll be back in a minute. I just need to pee.”

“Again?” Laurel asked. “It’s like the fifth time since we got here. Maybe you caught an inflammation of the bladder?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders, “Probably.”

Strolling to the bathroom, Felicity glanced at her watch. It was only nine, and she felt like it was long past midnight already. The last days she had fallen asleep around eight with her tablet in her hands which was more than unlikely for her. She was probably getting sick, Felicity thought with a sigh, closing the door of the bathroom stall behind her. She had been feeling weird for a couple of days now.

Felicity hated being sick, and she didn’t just hate in a way most people did because feeling sick meant not feeling good. No, she hated being sick in an even bigger way because when she was sick, she couldn’t go to school, and Felicity loved school. It was probably a really unusual thing for a seventeen-year-old to say, but it was the truth. Felicity just liked going to school.

Washing her hands, Felicity decided that she was just going to hope that it would pass because she really didn’t want to go to a doctor. Besides, it really wasn’t that bad. It was probably going away without any medication being needed anyway.

A yawn escaped her mouth when she strolled through the small corridor back to the main room of the café. She shook her head, trying to shake off the tiredness, but it just wouldn’t fall off of her. Maybe she should just spend the whole weekend in bed and-

She almost screeched when suddenly a hand grabbed her wrist and pulled her into a dark side room. Within seconds the door pressed against her back and a tall, muscular body pressed against her front while a pair of lips were attacking hers. Felicity didn’t hesitate for even the blink of a second. Her arms wrapped around a strong neck, pulling the soft lips closer to her and responding to the kiss with passion. His tongue slipped into her mouth, massaging hers for a moment, before their lips parted.

“Oliver,” she whispered, and his lips brushed against hers gently in response.

“I can’t believe you canceled our date night to spend time with your sisters and Nyssa instead. Couldn’t you have done that on any other day?” he asked, his breath ghosting over her face as he spoke. “Now I can’t even tell my parents that I have been in the library this week.”

“You do realize that when you tell your parents that you’ve been at the library, they expect you to have learned there instead of made out with your girlfriend, right?”

“I am learning when I am in the library.”

“Oh really?” Felicity asked, perking her eyebrows though he probably couldn’t see it in the dark because the only thing she could see was the outline of his body.

“Really,” Oliver answered and leaned forward, so his lips were almost touching hers. “I learned that you hum when I do this.” – He pressed his lips to the spot right under her ear, indeed making her hum. – “And I learned that you gasp for breath when I do this.” – He put his hands to her butt, squeezing playfully, and just like he had said Felicity gasped for breath and put her hands to his shoulders, holding onto him for dear life. – “And I learned that you whisper my name in a way I can still echoing through my mind days after we’ve last seen each other when I do this.”

“Oliver,” Felicity whispered barely audible and with desperate voice when Oliver pressed his body close to her, so she could feel his heartbeat against her chest.

Their lips met in another kiss. It was a gentle yet slightly desperate one. It had been almost a week since she had last kissed him. And, god, she had missed the taste of his lips on hers and the feeling of his body being pressed against hers so closely. Oliver’s right hand moved off her butt, and only seconds later the light switched on.

“Hi,” he whispered when their lips parted, and they looked at each other, smiling lovingly.

“Hi,” she whispered back.

Oliver’s lips brushed against hers shortly once more before he rested his forehead against hers and said, “I think you have to remind me again why exactly are we keeping this secret because the first thing I wanted to do when we won that game tonight has been lifting you in my arms and celebrating with you.”

“I guess I should congratulate first, so congratulations on your win. And about keeping this thing between us secret…” Felicity sighed, nuzzling his nose without opening her eyes. “Oliver, we talked about this.”

“I can’t remember. You have to remind me.”

“I wouldn’t be able to concentrate on graduation if people knew,” Felicity replied, and when Oliver cocked his head in question, she moved her hands down to the front of his chest, so her right hand rested right over his heart and explained, “You are quite popular in school, and whenever you just wink at a girl everyone in school knows about it. God, even the gossip magazines are after this kind of information.”

“But it would only take a few weeks before everyone would get used to it, and we’d had our peace,” Oliver responded, tugging a strand of her hair behind her ear. “And I’d had the freedom to kiss you wherever we are without having to tug you into a dark room.”

“But there is something really drawing about you tugging me into a dark room to make out,” Felicity tried to lighten the mood, but Oliver didn’t smile. Sighing, she straightened up onto the tip of her toes and pressed a kiss to the underside of his jaw. “The minute finals are over I am all yours. I promise. Just… I know it’s been almost five months already. Just… just give me these few more months please.”

Oliver looked at her for a long moment before he sighed. “You know how much I love you?”

“Enough to give me the time I need although you don’t like keeping our relationship a secret?”

“That is exactly how much I love you.

“I love you, too,” Felicity whispered with a smile.

Her stomach fluttered at the way Oliver looked at her. His piercing blue eyes seemed to burn right under her skin, making everything in her prickle in the best way. Slowly he leaned forward and captured her lips with his in a slow, loving kiss.

“When can we make good for the date we had to cancel tonight?” Oliver asked. “It would be nice spending a little more time close to you instead of shooting you stolen looks from the other side of the room.”

Felicity wrapped her arms back around Oliver’s neck and pressed herself closer to his muscular body, smiling up at him. “How about next Friday and Saturday?”

“Two days in a row? That might become my favorite week so far.”

Chuckling, Felicity leaned her head forward and rested her forehead against Oliver’s chest for a moment. She knew that keeping their relationship a secret wasn’t exactly easy because they always had to make sure nobody would see them when they were together, and she also knew that most people wouldn’t understand why she wanted to keep it secret, but the two of them together was just so much of a cliché – the nerdy wallflower of a girl and the popular football player from a billionaire house. And since she really didn’t like being the center of attention or even worse the center of gossip, she didn’t want anyone to know about them, and that included their friends and family because once one person knew, soon everyone would know. Things like these spread like wildfire.

“My mom and Quentin will go away for a romantic weekend, and Sara and Laurel want to visit their mom in Central City, so I actually have the house all for myself the whole weekend. You could even stay overnight.”

“Okay, now it’s officially going to be my favorite week. All the fun we are going to have…”

Oliver’s fingers snuck under her top, giving Felicity a good idea on what Oliver had in mind for said weekend. His body pressed a little closer to hers, and his lips met hers in a teasing kiss that was a perfect foretaste of what was to come for them during the next weekend. She had been hesitant about sleeping with him at first because she had been a virgin, but she trusted Oliver, and he had been patiently waiting until she had been ready a few weeks ago, and then he had been so gentle with her. He still was.

“We could also learn together,” Felicity suggested when their lips parted. Oliver’s groan only made her chuckle. “Come on, you know I am a really good teacher with fun ways of teaching, or did you forget anything about the human anatomy I taught you?”

“How about you test me now?”

“Not here,” Felicity said with a chuckle, shaking her head.

Before their test about the human anatomy she had made a game out of teaching him all the important terms he had to know. She had pointed at a part of her body, and if Oliver had been able to name it correctly, he had been allowed to kiss her there. Oliver had probably never been that eager to learn something, and actually she had enjoyed it far more than she had thought, too. There was just something weirdly drawing about listening to Oliver speaking Latin, even it had only been a few words. Still it had just-

When black spots started dancing in front of her eyes, and Felicity’s breaths grew a little shorter, she hastily gripped the fabric of Oliver’s shirt and held onto it for dear life while trying to get her breathing back under control.

“Hey, you’re okay?” Oliver asked worriedly. “Your face is almost white.”

“Just a little dizzy,” Felicity answered.

Squeezing her eyes closed, she leaned against Oliver’s chest with her head resting on his shoulder. Oliver’s arms wrapped around her waist, his hands stroking up and down her back until her breathing calmed down and her tensed muscles relaxed under his touch.

“Does this happen often?” Oliver asked, his voice not hiding his concern.

“Sometimes,” Felicity answered, leaning her head back against the door and looking at Oliver. “I think I might get sick.”

“Have you been to a doctor?”

Felicity rolled her eyes. “You are worse than my mother.”

“I am just worried.”

“That’s sweet,” Felicity replied, pecking his lips shortly. “I should go know before the others come to look for me.”

“I still think you should go and see a doctor,” Oliver said when she opened the door, but Felicity only shot him a look over her shoulder before leaving.

Oliver was really great. Being with him was great, even if it was only in secret. Luckily, it wouldn’t be a secret forever. Their finals were in like five months. They just needed to hold on for that time. It couldn’t be that hard!

When Felicity arrived back at their table, Laurel, Sara and Nyssa were talking with whispered voices.

“It is strange, isn’t it?” Nyssa asked, looking at the others.

“Oliver never missed out on anything,” Laurel agreed, nodding her head, “at least not for several months in a row, and now he is missing parties almost on a regular basis and didn’t even have any kind of flirt with the cheerleaders though it obviously isn’t lacking in offers.”

“So what do we think?” Sara asked. “Is he gay?”

“I think we shouldn’t jump to that conclusion so soon,” Nyssa said, shooting a pointed look at her girlfriend. “Maybe he is just-“

“Come on, let’s not let the football team distract us from the real subject,” Felicity said when she sat down. She took Laurel’s hand and linked arms with her stepsister. “What’s going on between you and Ted Grant?”

 

 

Oliver eyed up his reflection in the mirror once more, and moved his hand through his short hair with a sigh. It was crazy that even after months he still got slightly nervous when he was about to head out to a date with Felicity. He had never been self-conscious, but everything was different when he was with her. He did get nervous from time to time, and still she made him feel the most comfortable he had ever been.

With Felicity he didn’t have to pretend. He didn’t feel pressured to do anything he didn’t want to. She didn’t expect him to behave in a certain way. She just let him be who he really was, and he just felt like he was a so much more likeable person when he was with her. At least Oliver liked himself a lot more when he was with her, probably because of the way she looked at him like he was…

He couldn’t even describe it. She just had this expression of pure love in her eyes whenever she looked at him.

“You’re grinning like a Cheshire cat.”

“No, I’m not,” Oliver just replied, turning around to the bed without looking at his little sister.

Thea stood in the door to his room, her arms crossed in front of her little chest and looking at him with narrowed eyes. She had always been a nosy child. The nosiness had hit its peak when she had been four years old and had followed him around everywhere. It had decreased when she had started school and was now that she was eight years old increasing again. Wherever he went, she wanted to go, too. It was sweet though it could be quite exhausting and even slightly annoying.

“Do you have a crush on someone?”

“No,” Oliver answered immediately, grabbing the small bag of things he had packed for his weekend at Felicity’s place and leaving his room. He mussed up her hair when he went past her, making her giggle slightly.

“Where are you going?” she asked, following him down the stairs immediately.

“I’m going to spend the night at Tommy’s,” he lied, “hanging out together and playing video games.”

He had told his parents the same thing, while he had told Tommy that he had to babysit Thea because Rasia had fallen sick. Luckily, he knew that Tommy was out partying and wouldn’t call him here or anything because he really didn’t want to find an excuse why he had lied to him.

“Can I come with you?” Thea asked.

Oliver chuckled. “No.”

“Why not?”

“Because it’s just going to be Tommy and me,” Oliver replied, stopping at the door. “Rasia is going to be here for you all weekend.”

“Can’t you stay?”

Oliver stroked his hand over Thea’s hair, answering, “No, not this weekend. We’re going to spend time together the rest of the week while mom and dad are still away, okay?”

“Okay,” Thea replied with a sigh. “Have fun with Tommy.”

“Have fun with Rasia. Oh, and ask her for the chocolate brownies she baked earlier today.”

“She did?”

“Yes, she did,” Oliver responded with an amused smile about the way his sister’s face lit up at the information. “With doubly chocolate I think.”

“Rasia!” Thea called out immediately, turning on her heels and running towards the kitchen.

Chuckling, Oliver closed the door behind him and strolled over to his car. After he had put his bag on the back seat and sent Felicity a short message that he was on the way towards her, he started the motor and started driving.

Keeping their relationship a secret was anything but easy. Tommy had asked him several times by now why he was again and again skipping parties and not even flirting with any of the cheerleaders anymore. He was getting suspicious though Oliver knew that even if Tommy found out, he wouldn’t tell anybody. He just tried to respect Felicity’s wishes to keep it only between them until finals were over. There were still a few more months to go until then, but being with Felicity was worth it.

It had been quite crazy between them from the start. He remembered seeing her at school a few times before he had run into her at Queen Consolidated when she had done an internship there. She had spilled her coffee all over him and his laptop and immediately started babbling about how sorry she was and how of course she had to be the stupid intern to run into the boss’ son and destroy his equipment. Oliver had just stared at her, unable to tell her that actually he had been the one running into her. He still couldn’t really explain what had shaken him so much. There had just been something about her that had made him fall head over heels in love with her.

She had saved whatever data she had been able to save from his laptop, and they had started talking about her moving from Las Vegas to Starling City, so her mother could live together with her boyfriend. Donna and Quentin had gotten engaged soon after and planned their wedding back then. Felicity hadn’t minded. She had been happy for her mother.

After visiting her at her desk several times and with her internship coming to an end, Oliver had finally asked her out. She had hesitated at first, but somehow he had been able to convince her. Keeping their date a secret had been her only condition, and Oliver had agreed. He had been lucky that he hadn’t told Tommy about Felicity at that time. He just hadn’t been sure that he had had any chance with Felicity. She was so much smarter than him and so much more mature. All the rumors going around about him in school really hadn’t made her have much trust in him.

Well, now he had earned that trust, Oliver thought when he turned into Felicity’s street.

He had been looking forward to these few days with Felicity all week. If even one year ago somebody would have told him that he would soon prefer spending lazy evenings on the couch, watching TV and cuddling, over partying with Tommy, he would have probably laughed. He had never seen himself being the real good boyfriend type. He hadn’t hopped from one bed to the other like gossip indicated, but he hadn’t been in a committed relationship before Felicity, either.

He parked the car at the side of the street and got his bag from the back seats before hurriedly walking to her door and knocking. When she still hadn’t opened a few minutes later, he knocked once more. Still the door stayed closed.

Frowning, Oliver pulled his phone from the back pocket of his jeans, and checked if Felicity had texted him anything about not being home, but she hadn’t, and if she had received his message about heading off towards her, she would have replied and told him that he should come later. It was unlikely for Felicity to stand him or anyone else for that matter up. She was usually very reliable and actually-

“Hey.”

Oliver looked up to see Felicity leaning in the frame of the door. She was pale with dark shadows under her red rimmed eyes. Her small body looked even smaller in the wide oversize hoodie and the sweatpants she wore. She was playing with a strand of her hair nervously, and Oliver could see her hand shaking slightly.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” he asked immediately, stepping a little closer and taking her hand. He lifted it to his lips, kissing the knuckles before pressing it to his chest right above his heart. Felicity’s eyes followed his movements closely, her whole body tensing more and more with every second. “Did something happen?”

“No, I-“ Felicity started with raspy voice that made her cough slightly. “I think now I am definitely sick.”

Oliver looked at her sympathetically. She had texted him several times during the week that she felt like getting sick. He had told her to go see a doctor, but of course she hadn’t listened to him. She had probably been worried that the doctor would give her a sick note, and she wouldn’t be able to go to school for a few days. He knew it was one of Felicity’s worst nightmares which was adorable and weird at the same time.

Adorable and weird – definitely two attributes on the list of words to use when describing Felicity.

“I think I will just go to bed and sleep, so hopefully this will be over after the weekend,” Felicity stated after awhile.

“Thank god, now you have me to take care of you,” Oliver replied. “I am going to brew you a tea and get you a soup and-“

“Actually I’d rather be alone,” Felicity interrupted him hastily, looking up at him with slightly widened eyes. “Sorry, but you’d only get infected, and then your coach would kill you, so…”

She didn’t finish her sentence, just falling silent with a gesture of her hand. Oliver narrowed his eyes at her slightly. He couldn’t say what exactly it was, but there was something off about her. And he felt vindicated when Felicity looked down, avoiding his gaze.

“Felicity, what is really going on?” he asked seriously though he tried not to sound too demanding. He was just worried. “I can’t help you if you don’t tell me what is going on, so… please?”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, only looking up at him shortly before she lowered her gaze back to her feet again. He could see her struggling with what to do and though he had trouble being patient about this, he waited until she did something.

When she pulled her hand away from his chest and took a step back, he almost thought that she was just going to close the door, but instead she opened the door a little more, nodding her head for him to follow her when she turned on her heels and started walking inside wordlessly.

Oliver didn’t hesitate. He stepped inside and closed the door behind him, leaving his bag right next to the door before following her wordlessly. His heart was beating quickly against his ribs. His mind was running wildly.

What had happened?  
Was she sick? Seriously sick? She had had this attack of dizziness back in the café. Was there something more behind that  
Or had Donna and Quentin broken up, and Donna had decided to move back to Las Vegas?  
Had somebody died?

His nervousness was only increasing with every step he took, and Felicity not talking didn’t help with that, either. Actually it only made everything worse. So he just kept as quiet as she was and followed her upstairs, through a long hallway and finally into the bathroom.

Oliver stayed in the door frame, watching Felicity. She had her back turned towards him, but he could see that her arms were crossed in front of her chest while she was looking down at the windowsill.

“Felicity?” he asked in a whisper, but she didn’t answer or even turn around. “You’re scaring me a bit.”

When Felicity still showed no reaction, Oliver was just about to step closer to her. But he hadn’t even taken the first step, when Felicity suddenly turned around, looking at him with a hesitant expression in her eyes.

“Felicity?” he asked once more; his voice still very quiet as he was dreading whatever she wanted to tell him.

But Felicity didn’t speak. She just stepped closer until she stood right in front of him, her arms still crossed in front of her chest. And she still didn’t uncross them when she held out a white plastic stick for him.

“What’s that?” he asked.

Felicity still didn’t answer. She just uncrossed her arms to hold out the plastic closer for him, and Oliver took it hesitantly. He looked at her for another long moment, watching her crossing her arms in front of her chest protectively once more. Her eyes never left the white plastic stick in his hand.

Slowly Oliver lowered his gaze to it, too, finding two pink lines almost jumping right into his face. Right next to those two pink lines there was key explaining their meaning.

Two pink lines – pregnant.


	2. Chapter 2

Oliver couldn’t say if two pink lines had ever felt as threatening as they were feeling right now, or actually he could very clearly deny it. Two pink lines had never felt as threatening as they did right now that they were on that white plastic stick in his hands. The sight of them seemed to almost burn right into his eyes.

When Thea had been younger, she had had like an obsession for pink. For two years she had begged their parents to let her paint the walls of her rooms in a bright pink color. But Thea’s room had only recently been painted in a green color she had been obsessed with before, so their mother had rejected it until Thea’s ninth birthday when the girl had gotten a new painted room as a present. One wall had been pink, while the other three walls had been white with two pink lines at the top edge of it. Those pink lines hadn’t felt threatening.

Oliver couldn’t say why he was thinking about that right now, maybe only because it was so much easier than thinking about the two pink lines Felicity and he were still staring at without saying a word to the other.

“Oliver.”

He knew Felicity had only said it with whispered voice, and it hadn’t even been a loud whisper. It should have been barely audible. Still it felt like a loud scream in his ears, piercing through the silence that had settled when she had given him the white plastic stick. Only hesitantly he looked up at her, seeing tears in her eyes, and though his first instinct was to wrap his arms around her and comfort her, he found himself unable to. He felt like frozen in place with no chance to move or speak or do anything but stare at her or these threatening pink lines in front of him.

“I’m pregnant.”

It was the same thing those two pink lines on the white plastic stick had told him, and yet Felicity’s words made it so much more real than those two pink lines had managed to do. He felt like she had just punched him in the stomach. He felt nauseated.

Pregnant.  
Felicity was pregnant.  
She was having a baby.  
She was having _his_ baby.  
_They_ were having a baby.

He was still trying to process that piece of information given to him by these two pink lines he stared at once more now and by Felicity herself, but no matter how hard he tried he seemed to be unable to process them. They felt too heavy, too difficult, too complex. His head felt too small for this big news; his thoughts too slow to process it and yet too quick to occupy themselves only with that.

Instead they were skipping the real processing of the meaning and actual consequences of those words and just seemed to mess around with him.

What was he supposed to do now?  
What was expected of him?  
What did teenagers being in this situation normally do?

“So…” he started slowly, not missing how his voice sounded so hoarse it was barely understandable and definitely didn’t sound like him. So he cleared his throat before he continued, “I guess we should… you know… do the right thing and-“

“Oliver, if you’re suggesting getting married, I am going to find a book or a hairdryer or whatever else to beat you up with it,” Felicity interrupted him before he got the chance to finish his proposition. “We are not getting married.”

Biting his tongue, Oliver pushed his free hand into the pocket of his jeans. His other hand held onto the white plastic stick even more firmly; almost like his life depended on it when Oliver actually felt the exact other way about it. He felt like it threatened him. It threatened his dreams, his freedom, the whole life he had envisioned for himself.

Oliver took in a deep breath, casting a short glance at Felicity before he looked back down at the white plastic stick, feeling his eyes being drawn by those pink lines on it. “Are you sure because it’s-“

Felicity released a bitter laugh, and when Oliver looked back up at her once more, he saw the tears that had been in her eyes before were already streaming down her cheeks and dropping from her chin to the fabric of her hoodie where they left wet spots. Again he felt the urge to pull her into his arms and against his chest and give her whatever comfort there was to offer. But Oliver wasn’t sure if there really was any support or comfort he had to offer. He was still trying to get over his shock, unsuccessfully as it seemed.

“It is what is expected, right? When you- When- When something like this happens, you get married,” she said, her voice sounding harsh. Oliver watched her rolling her eyes and wiping away some of the tears on her cheeks with the sleeve of her hoodie. “We’re living in the twenty-first century, Oliver.”

Oliver nodded slowly, trying to hide his relief over her words.

He was eighteen years old. He hadn’t gone to college. He hadn’t even graduated high school. Felicity was the first girl he had really committed to, but that didn’t mean that it would last forever or that they should just make it official already. He was too young to get married. He was too young for any of this.

 _They_ were too young for any of this.

“Shouldn’t we first talk about-?“ Felicity started, her voice breaking slightly. She had to take a deep breath before starting again, “Shouldn’t we first talk about whether to… keep it? Or actually whether to… have it at all?”

Only now did he realize that maybe he should do the first step before the second after all. Suggesting doing the right thing and getting married without figuring out if the right thing to do was really necessary was…

They were too young for _any_ of this, not just the marriage but first and foremost for what had almost driven him to suggest getting married in the first place.

They were almost still children themselves.

“What do you-?“ Oliver started, his voice breaking just like hers had before, too. “What are you going to do?”

Sniffling, Felicity sat down on the edge of the bathtub. She wrapped her arms around her middle even more strongly. It almost looked like she was literally trying to hold herself together, scared that if she let go, she’d fall apart. Oliver stayed where he was still standing near the door with the white plastic stick in his hand. He knew he should comfort her or at least try to, but he just couldn’t.

Or maybe it was more than just his inability to comfort her that kept him in place. Oliver had the weird feeling that if he got any closer to Felicity and…

He couldn’t really put it into words, but he suddenly saw himself sitting next to her on the edge of the bathtub, wrapping her arm around her shoulder and looking down with her to a huge bump that showed under her wide hoodie. The thought made him blink a few times to make sure there really was no bump to be seen, and it kept him frozen in his place, several feet away from her, keeping a safe distance.

“We’re too young for this,” Felicity whispered eventually. Though her gaze was lowered to the floor, Oliver didn’t miss how her cheeks were wet with tears that rolled down her face and dropped from her chin to her hoodie, forming new wet spots next to the ones that had almost dried by now. “We’re kids.”

Exactly his thoughts!

“So...” Oliver bit his tongue, not continuing to speak.

God, how was he going to ask this?!  
He didn’t want to have a talk like this!

But he knew he had no choice.

“So what do you want to do?”

Felicity sniffled once more, looking back up at him. It seemed like her tears couldn’t be stopped. Her cheeks were wet from the ones that had already fallen. Her eyes were red and puffy with new tears in them already while her gaze was directed at him with a pleading expression.

“I don’t know,” she whispered quietly. Her arms tightened around herself once more as her whole body started trembling almost violently. “I don’t know what I want. I’m just not sure I can do this.”

“So you want to terminate the…” Oliver couldn’t say the word, so he just gestured towards her middle instead, leaving no doubt what he meant.

“I don’t know.”

“So you want to give it up for adoption?”

“I don’t-“

“Or are you going to keep it anyway?”

“I don’t know, Oliver!” she suddenly almost yelled, making Oliver fall silent in an instant. “I don’t know what to do! I am seventeen years old! I am not supposed to make a decision like this!”

She hid her face in her hands for a short moment. First Oliver thought she was crying as her body was still trembling heavily, but then Felicity took in a deep breath and looked back at Oliver again. Her eyes showed a determination they had lacked before when she got up and slowly approached him until she stood only the length of an arm away from him. Oliver stayed motionless though a part of him wanted to take a step back from her and bring more distance between them.

“I don’t know what to do,” she told him, her voice trembling slightly. Oliver held his breath, waiting for her to continue. “And because I don’t know, you need to tell me what to do. What do I do?”

Oliver’s thoughts were running wildly.

How could she ask something like this from him?  
How could she expect him to make this decision for her?

He didn’t even know what options there really were.  
Abortion? Adoption? Keeping it?  
Were there other options he didn’t know about?  
But even if those were all the options, how was he supposed to decide which one was the right for her?  
If she didn’t know what she wanted, how was he supposed to know?

He wasn’t supposed to make this kind of decision for her.  
He was too young to make a decision like this for someone else.  
He was too young to-

“Oliver, what-?” Felicity started but stopped. Her eyes widened slightly when he took a step back and closer into the frame of the door.

“I- I can’t-“ he said, shaking his head. “I can’t decide this for you, Felicity. I-”

“Oliver, you-“

Oliver couldn’t hear it. He didn’t want to hear her voice, begging him to make a decision for her. He couldn’t take it. So Oliver turned on his heels and walked out of the bathroom. He hurried down the stairs, trying to shut out the sounds of Felicity calling after him and then starting to cry again.

He couldn’t be in here any longer. He couldn’t breathe in here. He felt like he was suffocating in the most painful way.

Hastily Oliver grabbed his bag from where he had put it next to the door and pushed the white plastic stick into the pocket of his pants. With his hand already at the door handle, he glanced back over his shoulder shortly, but he could not bring himself to turn back around and go back upstairs. Instead he opened the door and with a heavy stitch of guilt in his heart he left.  

 

 

 _What are you going to do?_  
_So you want to terminate the…_  
_So you want to give it up for adoption?_  
_Or are you going to keep it anyway?_  
_I can’t decide this for you_.

Oliver’s words had been echoing through her mind the rest of the weekend and during the whole week. And the more she had heard them being repeated in her thoughts, the more she had realized that Oliver had already made his decision.

_I can’t decide this for you.  
For you._

He had walked out of that bathroom, leaving her all alone with this. She should have known then already, but it had taken some more hours of torturing herself with the question what he was thinking and feeling for her to really realize. Oliver had distanced himself from making this decision with her, putting all the weight on her shoulders. He had just walked out like this news hadn’t concerned him.

She didn’t know what she had expected of him basically because she had never thought they’d be in a situation like this, but in that split second she had looked at him standing in front of her door and worriedly asking what was wrong with her, she had thought that maybe telling him was the best she could do. She had thought sharing that shocking news with him would help her figuring out what to do, and when he had suggested getting married, she had even thought that maybe together they could find a way to deal with it, a way that didn’t include getting married rashly because that would be irrational, but…

Felicity knew that he had been in shock. The shock had been what had made him suggest getting married, and the shock had been what had made him walk out. It had been written all over his face, and she understood that because she had been in shock, too. She still was. And still she was disappointed in Oliver’s reaction. She hadn’t expected him to throw confetti and even if he had, Felicity wasn’t sure how she had reacted to that. She had just expected him to…

Felicity had no idea what she had expected from him, and having expected anything from him probably hadn’t been fair. He had the right to feel how he felt, and he had the right to take time and figure this thing out for himself. Actually if Felicity could, she’d walk away from this, too.

How was she going to make this decision on her own?

She had thought about telling her mom, but she wasn’t ready to see the expression of disappointment in her face yet. She knew or at least assumed that her mother wouldn’t kick her out of her home or force her into doing something she didn’t want, but Felicity was sure her mother would be disappointed. Donna had never missed making her daughter know that she wanted her to have a good life, a better life than she herself had had in Las Vegas where she had worked a ton of late shifts as a cocktail waitress in a casino to afford even the most necessary things after Felicity’s father had left. Felicity couldn’t see how a teenage pregnancy fit into what Donna wanted for her.

“Everything alright with you, bro? You’ve been completely off since the weekend,” she heard a voice not far behind her.

“Yeah, I’m fine.”

Felicity stepped a little closer to her locker, trying to hide behind the locker door as much as possible though she knew it wouldn’t hide her, and even if it did, with Tommy and Oliver standing behind her, the door at the side of her locker had no use in hiding her.

“Really? Cause you have barely said a word these last days.”

“Just a little trouble at home.”

Hastily Felicity took the books she needed for her next lesson, closed the locker door and hurried away to her class. She was late as it was, and she really didn’t need to listen to Oliver telling Tommy about how bad his weekend had been.

In the classroom she hastily sat down next to Laurel, who cast her a worried gaze.

“Everything alright?” she muttered under her breath when the teacher started talking.

“Sure,” Felicity replied, forcing herself to smile at Laurel shortly. “Just a little stressed out.”

“You’re sure? You’ve-“

“Ms. Lance,” the teacher interrupted her, looking at the two of them with a stern expression ion her face, “is there something you want the class to participate in? Because otherwise I’d appreciate if you could listen to me.”

“Sorry, Mr. Freedman,” Laurel said hastily, shrugging her shoulders at Felicity.

These last days since she had found out that she was pregnant Felicity had locked herself into her room and mostly lain in bed with her blanket pulled over her head, trying to shut the world out and concentrate on her thought about what to do instead.

She hadn’t come to any decision yet.

She had browsed various websites for help. She had read experience reports of girls in the same situation, and she had informed herself on what options there were for her situation.

But she hadn’t made a decision yet. She felt lost and alone and-

When her phone vibrated in the back pocket of her jeans, Felicity hastily pulled it out and glanced at the display under the table, making sure Mr. Freedman wouldn’t notice.

_Saw you in the hallway. How are you?_

Felicity’s thumbs were already hovering over the display, ready to type her answer, when she realized that she didn’t know how to answer to this. What was Oliver even thinking, sending her a message like this after he had left her like he had? She was just about to put her phone back to the back pocket of her pants when she received another message.

_Can we meet?_

Felicity read the three words over and over again, making sure she didn’t hallucinate them, but apparently Oliver really wanted to meet her. Maybe he had gotten over his shock and was ready to talk about their options after all.

_At the staircase next to the library in three minutes?_

It only took two seconds before he texted back, _I’ll be there_.

Hastily Felicity lifted her hand, making Mr. Freedman stop mid-sentence and look at her with a questioning expression in his eyes.

“Ms. Smoak?”

“May I go to the toilet, please?”

Felicity didn’t miss the expression in her teacher’s face. He had obviously hoped she would contribute to whatever was the subject of this lesson. Still he nodded, so Felicity hastily jumped up from her chair and left class.

Her heart was beating wildly while she was walking through the hallways towards the library hurriedly. She knew she shouldn’t put too much hope into whatever would come out of that meeting with Oliver because even if he had gotten over his shock and was ready to talk, talking about their situation wasn’t exactly any easier than the silence that had been between them. Actually Felicity wasn’t even sure if she was really ready to talk about this or the options there were yet.

She almost stopped in the middle of the hallway. But instead of doing so, she shook her head and kept going. They _needed_ to talk about their options. Felicity had no idea how urgent it was because she hadn’t dared to go to a doctor yet, but she didn’t want to drag out the decision. The longer they waited, the harder it would get.

Felicity felt tears springing to her eyes again, and she stopped with the door handle to the staircase already in her hand to take a deep breath and wipe away the tears before they had the chance to fall. She couldn’t cry again; not now that Oliver might finally be read to talk. School might not be the best place to do so, but it was better than nothing. And she needed to be focused for this talk or at least she shouldn’t be crying.

Hastily Felicity opened the door to the staircase and stepped in before closing the door behind her. Oliver stood at the window with his hands holding onto the handrail of the stairs tightly and his head being lowered between his shoulders sadly. Felicity bit her tongue at the sight of him like that. He looked just as exhausted as she felt.

“Hi,” she whispered, immediately biting down on her bottom lip again.

Slowly Oliver turned around and looked at her. Felicity eyed him up carefully. He was pale with dark shadows under his eyes. She was sure that he saw the same signs of sleepless nights and exhaustion in her face like she had seen it in the mirror this morning. Oliver pushed his hands into the pockets of his pants, hunching his shoulders.

“Hi,” Oliver whispered back, looking at her with guilt in his eyes. “How are you?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders, wrapping her arms around her body. “How should I be?”

“I- I don’t know,” Oliver replied, pushing his hands deeper into the pockets of his pants. “I thought you’d suffer from… I don’t know… morning sick-“

“Are you crazy to say something like that here?” Felicity hissed, hastily stepping closer to the stairs, so she could check if anyone else was in the staircase on the floor above or beneath them.

“I checked before you came here,” Oliver explained quietly. “We’re alone.”

Felicity took in a deep breath, exhaling slowly through her mouth. She sat down on the bottommost step of the stairs, pulled her legs close to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. Not looking at Oliver, she whispered, “I’m sorry. I just- I don’t want anyone to know.”

“I understand.”

For awhile neither of them said anything. Oliver lowered his head, looking down at the floor like it held the answer to an important question. Felicity rested her cheek on the top of her knees, closing her eyes. She hadn’t slept much lately though it seemed like she was always tired.

“Have you-“

Felicity turned her head, now resting her chin on her knees instead, so she could look at him. Oliver looked uncomfortable. He watched her with a hesitant expression in his eyes, carefully considering his words. His hands had grabbed the handrail of the stairs again, holding onto it so tightly, his knuckles were white. It almost looked like he was holding onto it to keep himself from running away again. Felicity lowered her eyes at the thought.

“Have you talked to someone about this?”

Felicity shook her head. “Have you?”

“No.”

And again silence settled.

Felicity wasn’t sure if Oliver thought it was her turn to take the next step and say something that brought them any closer to what they should talk about, but Felicity had no idea how to start this talk anyway. She feared that if she took one wrong step or rather said one wrong word, he would run away again, and right now Felicity couldn’t bear the thought to sit in the staircase of their school alone, again having been left.

“Have you already decided on what you will do now?”

“I did research,” Felicity whispered quietly.

She didn’t dare to look Oliver in the eyes and instead stared at his shoes, grey sneakers that matched the color of his henley. They had probably been expensive. She could see the logo of the brand at the side and-

“So you have made a decision?”

She hadn’t made a decision. How could she have done that in so little time?

After everything she had read, Felicity actually only felt more confused than before because obviously everybody had a different opinion on what she was supposed to do or what was the best choice in this situation.

In those blogs she had scrolled through, a lot of people’s immediate suggestion to teenagers asking for help with an unplanned pregnancy had been abortion. They had written that teenagers were throwing away their lives when they had a baby, and they were destined to mess up their child’s life as well. Some people who had been in a situation like this before and had decided for the abortion had agreed that it had been the only way, and they had never regretted it. But then again there had been other girls or women writing that they had never been able to forgive themselves for having an abortion.

A lot of the people who had been against the abortion had suggested having the baby and then giving it away for adoption. That way the baby was allowed to live, hopefully in a loving family that could offer the child a lot more than a teenager could. But she would still have to tell people about it and would forever be the girl that got pregnant with seventeen. Besides, Felicity had read about so many kids that had lived in foster care for years. They’ve been handed around from one family to the other, never feeling home anywhere. She didn’t know if that could happen to a child that was born and given up for adoption under circumstances like these too, but…

Then there was the third option, keeping the baby. Felicity was still shocked about how many teenagers she had read about that had willingly stopped using protection because they had wanted a baby like that fourteen-year-old in the one blog that had been sad when after three months of actively trying to have a baby with her fifteen-year-old boyfriend, she still hadn’t been pregnant. And she hadn’t been the only one. But of course there had also been girls who hadn’t planned on being pregnant in that young age and who had still decided to keep their babies. Most of them had said the same thing – it had been hard but worth it.

But having a baby? Felicity had never even thought about if she wanted a baby at all. She had always thought that she was too young to think about something like that and that time would tell if she wanted to be a mother one day. She had never thought she would have to make that kind of choice right now.

“Felicity?”

Oliver’s voice was quiet and gentle, but in the silence of the staircase it seemed so loud that it made her flinch, making almost every part of her body hurt from the violence of the sudden movement. She wrapped her arms around her legs more tightly, pulling them closer to her chest and rolling herself together like a fe-

Felicity gulped loudly before she whispered, “I don’t know.”

“I-“ Oliver started, and Felicity hastily looked up at him, making him stop in surprise. “I want you to know that… whatever you decide… I will… support your decision.”

He would support her decision. _Her_ decision.

She had read about a lot of girls who had been forced into a decision by their parents or boyfriend or even friends. They had suffered from not having been able to make an own decision on this.

Felicity had the chance to make her own decision, but she couldn’t. She _needed_ Oliver to say something. Maybe if she felt forced into one direction, she would know what she really wanted like your reaction to flipping a coin told you what you really wanted because either you were happy or sad with that it showed you.

That was what she needed.

“You have to tell me what you want, Oliver.”

“I told you,” Oliver whispered his answer, looking at her guiltily, “I can’t make that decision.”

“I don’t want you to make the decision. All I am asking you for is telling me what you want in this situation. I want you to tell me-“

She stopped when a door upstairs opened, and nearing steps could be heard on the stairs. Oliver cast her an apologetic gaze and left, leaving Felicity alone once more. Felicity fought the urge to just start crying again. School really wasn’t the right place for that. So she got up on her wobbly legs and started walking back to her class.

 

 

Felicity rolled the coin back and forth on her desk like she had done for several hours now, still considering flipping it.

But could she do that? Could she just flip a coin about this?

She knew whatever the coin would show wouldn’t make the decision. It was supposed to just help her finding out what she really wanted, but still flipping a coin about this, no matter how little power it would hold over her decision, seemed wrong. It was literally a life or death situation after all.

Felicity gave the coin a stronger push, making it roll across the top of her desk and over the edge of it. It fell to the floor where it moved for a short while before it finally stopped. Felicity didn’t dare to look if it showed head or tail, so she just got up from her chair and sat down on her bed, resting her aching back against the cold wall and tugging her legs close to her chest.

She needed to do something. She couldn’t go on like this, and since Oliver couldn’t offer her any advice or real support in the decision-making, she needed to find someone else who could.

Unfortunately she didn’t know anyone who could help.

Usually the person she would go to in a situation like this would be her mother. She had always offered her comfort and support, and Felicity trusted her with most of the things, but this… this was one of the things she couldn’t tell her. She just couldn’t.

She didn’t have a biological father or at least none she was close to, and she didn’t even want to think about Quentin’s reaction when he found out. Her biological father had left her and her mom. What if Quentin did the same when he found out?

The thought gave her stomach cramps. Her mother was finally happy, and she didn’t want to ruin that for her. So Quentin couldn’t know which also meant she couldn’t tell Sara or Laurel because they were close to their dad, and she didn’t want to put them into a position where they had to lie to him. Besides, Laurel was only a little more than a year older, Sara even half a year younger, so they probably wouldn’t be the right people to talk to anyway.

She had found several addresses of consulting centers near Starling City. Maybe that was the right place to go. Felicity just didn’t want to talk to a stranger.

Which still left her all alone with this.

Felicity felt tears springing into her eyes, so she squeezed her eyes shut and took in a deep breath. Slowly she felt herself calming down and the burning in her throat decreasing.

Maybe going to the consulting center really was the only thing to do now. There would be adults with much more experience to talk to. Certainly they could help her figuring out what was the right thing to do, and how she could deal with all of this. And what other choice did she have?

A quiet knock at the door pulled her out of her thoughts. Hastily she wiped away her tears with the sleeve of her hoodie and said, “Yes?”

The door opened and Laurel leaned into the doorframe, holding a steaming mug in her hands. She smiled at Felicity, saying, “You seemed a little… off these last days, and I remember when I had heartache because of Tommy, your mom made me a mug of warm milk, so I thought…”

“She always did that for me when I was a child,” Felicity said with a nostalgic smile, nodding her head as a sign for Laurel to come in, and she gladly took the mug from her stepsister. “Thank you.”

While Felicity took the first sip, Laurel stayed standing in front of the bed indecisively. Only when Felicity lowered the mug into her lap and looked up at her questioningly, she sat down on the edge of the bed.

“Okay, I know you are still kind of new to having a sister,” Laurel stated with a comforting smile, “but you should know by now that the good thing with sisters is that you can always talk to them.”

“I’m fine,” Felicity said hastily, forcing herself to smile though she kind of knew that if it only looked half as forced as it felt, Laurel would probably see right through the lie.

Laurel reached out her hand for Felicity’s cheek, wiping away a tear she hadn’t known she had been crying, before she whispered, “No, you’re not.”

Felicity closed her eyes, taking in a deep breath. “Maybe I’m not.”

“My offer is still on the table. If you want to talk, you can talk to me.” Felicity shook her head while Laurel gently wiped away another tear that had rolled down Felicity’s cheek. “And when you don’t want to talk, you can still choose to just cry on my shoulder.”

Felicity took in a sniffling dress. “Really?”

“Really,” Laurel promised, already sliding closer to Felicity until she sat right next to her on the bed with her back leaning against the wall.

She had been in need of comfort for too long to reject Laurel’s offer. The tears streamed down her cheeks even before her face was hidden against the side of Laurel’s neck. Her body was trembling again, and Laurel wrapped her arms around Felicity, stroking her hands up and down her back in a gesture of silent comfort.

Laurel didn’t say a word, and Felicity was glad she didn’t because usually the thing most people said when comforting someone was that everything was going to be alright.

And right now Felicity was not sure that was true.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will post new chapters (hopefully) every Saturday. 
> 
> On Tumblr I will also post partly blacked out notes for the next chapter every Tuesday or Wednesday (haven't decided yet).  
> I use the same name on tumblr as I do here. ;)


	3. Chapter 3

Oliver kicked the door shut behind him and dropped his sports bag to the floor with a groan. A few days ago he had thought that some hours of burning off all his energy in the gym would help him to clear his mind and figure out what to do, but after days of using every free minute for excessive, punishing training he had only achieved that his body felt just as much like crap as the rest of him had already done before.

It had been almost two weeks now since Felicity had showed him the positive pregnancy test, and it had been more than one week since he had last talked to her and walked away from her again. He shouldn’t have walked out on her. And he definitely shouldn’t have walked out on her _twice_ in only two weeks.

He rubbed his hands over his face coarsely while he was leaning back against the door with another groan of exhaustion.

She would never forgive him for that. He knew her father had walked out on her and her mom when she had been a little girl, and she had never truly gotten over it. Instead sometimes she still wondered what had been wrong with her and why she hadn’t been good enough for him to stay. She had even shed a few tears when she had told him about it the first time, and nothing he could have said had helped her in that moment. Talking about him had made her be the little girl that had been left again, so Oliver was really sure that Felicity would never forgive him.

But what had he been supposed to do then? And what was he supposed to do now?

For the first time since he had taken his first step on his own he had an actual chance of making his parents proud of him again. In less than half a year he would graduate high school with halfway acceptable grades and then start college. He had promised himself to keep out of the headlines of gossip magazines for these last months of school as much as he had control about it. He had wanted to be a good son and try to make up for what he had screwed up when he and Tommy had spent a lot of time on private or not-so-private parties, drinking alcohol that of course they hadn’t and still weren’t allowed to drink and fooling around.

A baby would be in his way of that. It would mess up the whole plan and everything he had already achieved in the months he had rather spent with Felicity instead of on parties. His father would kill him if he found out, and his mother might have always been on his side, but this was probably a little too much even for her.

A baby would just cross all of his plans, and actually Oliver couldn’t imagine that it would be any different for Felicity. She wanted to go to MIT. It’s what she had always wanted. How was she supposed to concentrate on her graduation when she was pregnant? How would she going to manage moving to Boston and studying with a baby?

He felt another stitch of guilt at the thought of her and actually had to put his hand to his chest and rub it over his left side because he could physically feel the pain the guilt caused him. At the same time his mind was cursing him for what he had done and was still doing as long as he avoided talking to Felicity.

Oliver wanted to help her. He wanted to help her find a solution she could live with or rather a solution they could both live with, but he just couldn’t. He felt unable to talk to her about this or to decide what they should do. It wasn’t fair to her, and he would forever feel guilty that he was leaving her alone with this, but Oliver just didn’t know what to think about this, and he didn’t know what to do now.

Since he couldn’t help her or at least didn’t feel able to do so, he would just continue to punish himself by skipping whatever party Tommy wanted to take him to and keep training excessively instead.

Oliver had just reached the foot of the stairs when his mother stepped out of the living room. She eyed him up with a worried expression, and Oliver pushed his hands into the pockets of his pants, avoiding her gaze. His mother knew him very well, so Oliver was sure that she already suspected that something was bothering him. He didn’t want anyone to know what was bothering him, though, so he just couldn’t tell her about it, and looking at her would also just help confirming her suspicions.

“Oliver, do you have a few minutes for me?”

Oliver looked up, hastily gesturing over his shoulder towards the stairs, and replied, “Sorry. I actually just want to fall into-“

“It won’t take long. I would just like to introduce you to an old friend who decided to use her short presence in Starling City to surprise me with a visit,” his mother interrupted him immediately.

She was smiling at him softly, but the tone of her voice let no doubt that she wouldn’t accept any objection. The longer he would try to discuss this with her, the longer it would take until he could lock himself back into his room and get some rest, so Oliver took in a deep breath and stepped closer to his mother slowly.

“Thank you,” she said.

She linked her arm with his and led him into the living room. Oliver didn’t miss the way she still eyed him up worriedly, but he chose to ignore it. All he wanted was getting over with meeting whatever friend had visited his mother today and to finally be alone again. He just didn’t feel like being with people and-

Oliver stopped in the middle of the living room, several feet away from where a brunette woman sat on the couch, cradling a baby in her arms. The little human being was moving slowly and making sounds that sounded like it was maybe uncomfortable or something.

“Did he wake up?” Moira asked, leaving Oliver’s side to sit down next to her friend and play with the baby’s right foot like it was the most natural thing for her to do.

“Oh, yes,” the brunette answered with a quiet chuckle. “I guess he has been sleeping long enough now. When I picked him up at my daughter’s place, he had just fallen asleep. I guess he thought he would do his granny a favor when he is asleep, but I enjoy having him awake to be honest.”

“He really is beautiful, Laura.”

“Do you want to hold him?”

“I would love to. It’s been so long till I last held a baby, and I have to admit I missed it a little. It was so nice when the kids have been younger and…”

Oliver watched from where he still stood in the middle of the living room how his mother’s friend put the baby into her arms. The expression in Moira’s face was full of love while she was talking about her own children and stroking her hand over the baby’s head, looking down at it like she held a precious treasure in her arms.

Suddenly Oliver felt just as nauseated as he had felt when Felicity had showed him the pregnancy test. It felt surreal watching the scene, almost like a dream and yet seeing a baby and watching his mother holding it and looking at it the way she did right now made the situation he was in even more real.

Felicity was having a baby. She was growing a baby inside of her, and she was all alone with the decision of what to do with the situation. She was all alone with it because he wasn’t able to help her or maybe because he was just too cowardly to sit down and talk this out with her. He just felt overwhelmed by this, and he didn’t know how to handle the situation. It was no acceptable excuse, but it was the only one he could offer.

“I am Laura Bauer. I attended school with your father,” the brunette woman said, startling Oliver out of his thoughts. “You have to be Oliver.”

Mrs. Bauer was standing right in front of him and smiled at him almost sympathetically, probably noticing that he felt uncomfortable with the baby in the room. For a short second Oliver wondered if his reaction had given away too much about what had been bothering him these last days, but then again what teenage boy didn’t feel awkward when being around a baby?

“Hi,” Oliver said hesitatingly, shaking the hand the brunette offered. He tried to smile, but he just knew that it had to look like a forced grimace. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“It’s nice to meet you, too. I’ve heard a lot about-“

She interrupted herself when the baby let out a high-pitched cry. Oliver flinched at the sound, instinctively taking one step back. How could something so small make a sound that was so loud?

“I better find the pacifier before my little grandson scares your son away, Moira,” Laura said with an amused chuckle. She cast Oliver a sympathetic glance before she looked back at Moira and added, “I don’t think you will join me in the granny-club anytime soon.”

Moira laughed before she replied, “Oh, I hope I won’t. Oliver really is too young for a baby. Honey, you can gladly wait another ten years before making me a grandmother.”

Oliver’s stomach twisted painfully at his mother’s words because the thought of being too young for a baby had been what had tortured him in the last days. Being too young for a baby was what scared him about this. Being too young was what could cause him to fail his child and fail Felicity like he was already failing her right now. Being too young for a baby was what kept him from allowing himself to even think about the possibility to keep it. He hadn’t been able to deal with her pregnancy when she had told him about it, so what if he couldn’t handle being a father? He didn’t want to fail his child and disappoint Felicity any more than he had disappointed her already.

His mother must have seen the struggle in his face and thought it had been about the teasing because she smiled at him softly and explained, “It’s normal not to be excited about children in your age, Oliver. Nobody is ready for the thought of a child at such a young age, but I hope one day you will be. Actually you can trust me when I tell you that once you will hold your first child in your arms, you will fall head over heels in love with a baby, too. At least that is what I wish for you.”

_Once you will hold your first child in your arms, you will fall in love with a baby, too._

His mother’s words echoed through his mind, and the more often he heard them, the more he knew that his mother was wrong.

“Would you please excuse me?” he asked, taking a few steps back already. “I had a long day, and-“

“It was nice meeting you, Oliver,” Mrs. Bauer said with a smile.

“It was nice meeting you, too.”

The last syllable had just been spoken when he turned around on his heels and hurried out of the living room and upstairs, leaping several stairs at the same time. His muscles protested in pain, but Oliver ignored that. He rushed into his room unwaveringly. The door hadn’t fallen shut behind him yet when Oliver already held his phone in his hand and was dialing Felicity’s number. Hers was the first number on speed dial, but he still dialed it manually, remembering it perfectly.

The dialing tone sounded twice before Felicity picked up.

“Hey.”

Felicity’s voice was quiet. She sounded exhausted and tired and a lot of other things that he couldn’t name. They all made him even more aware than he was painfully aware of how much he had hurt her and what burden he had left her alone with already.

“How are you?” he asked.

Oliver leaned back against the door and squeezed his eyes shut, sending a silent prayer to a God he didn’t really believe in that Felicity was as okay as one could be under the circumstances. Those last days he had wondered again and again if she was okay or if she was suffering from the hormonal change or the situation itself for that matter.

“What do you want, Oliver?” Felicity asked back instead of answering.

Her voice sounded harsh. Of course it did, Oliver thought. In the last two weeks he hadn’t done anything to help her make what was probably the most important decision of his life yet. Instead all he had done had been demanding from her to answer the questions he hadn’t dared to answer himself. She was angry, and she had every right to be angry at him. He would do his best to make sure she would forgive him.

“I- uhm…” he stammered insecurely, and rubbed his hand over his scalp almost violently. He had no idea how he should start this, but he knew that he had to be the one to start. He had been walking out on her. He needed to be the one to walk back to her. He couldn’t let her take the first step towards him, so Oliver took in a deep breath and asked, “Do you still want to know what I think?”

Felicity hesitated to answer. She said no word. Instead she just breathed in and out slowly, and Oliver felt his heartbeat fastening in response. If he was too late, and she had made her decision, he wouldn’t urge her to listen to him. He had missed his chance when he had walked out on her twice.

“I am-“ Felicity started, sucking in a deep breath. “I am not sure. I think I made my decision, and-“

“I don’t want to persuade you into doing something you don’t want to,” Oliver said hastily. “If you don’t want to have it, I will hold your hand while the doctor will- I don’t know if I would be allowed to stay during the procedure, but… And if you want to give it up for adoption, we will find parents to adopt the baby together. In case we have any say in this. I- I don’t know about that.”

He took in another deep breath, trying to get himself back under control and stop rambling the way that he just had. He had always known that one day Felicity’s babbling would infect him, he thought with a sad smile.

“I have an appointment at the Pregnancy Consoling Center next week,” Felicity said. “I- I think I know what I want to do, but I- I am not sure yet, so maybe talking to someone will help.”

“Like I said, I will support you, whatever your decision will be,” Oliver said gently.

“But you have made your own decision on what you would like me to do?”

Oliver moved his hand through his short hair and squeezed his eyes shut even more firmly.

“I have no right to ask you to do anything.”

“But?” Felicity asked.

“But if I am allowed to say what I would like us to do,” Oliver started and made a long pause to give Felicity the chance to interrupt him and tell him that she didn’t want to hear what he would like them to do after he had walked out on her when she had needed him and only continued when she didn’t try to stop him, “I would like us to have this baby, and raise him and or her together.”

Oliver waited for Felicity to say something. His heart was beating wildly. It almost felt like it was trying to crack his ribs. His chest was burning with the need for air since he was holding his breath while he was waiting for an answer or any kind of reaction from her. Felicity stayed quiet, though, and it only made Oliver more nervous.

“I love you, Felicity,” he whispered. “And I think we can do this together if you’re willing and able to give me another chance and prove to you that I will be there, but… I still stand by my promise. I will support you whatever your decision is and-“

“Can we meet?” Felicity interrupted him. “I- I don’t want to discuss this on the phone.”

“At the Aquarium in ten minutes?”

“Okay.”

“See you there.”

“Yeah.”

Oliver hung up, rubbing his hands over his tired face shortly.

His mother had been wrong when she had said that he would fall in love with a baby once he would hold his first child in his arms. He loved Felicity, and he was scared like hell of what was ahead for them in the future, but he knew he would fall in love with this baby a whole lot before he or she would be born. He just had to allow himself to do so despite being scared of failing both of them, Felicity and the baby, miserably.

 

 

The Aquarium had a calming effect on her, Felicity realized once again. Everything seemed to move slower here, time included. This was what living in a snow globe had to feel like. She should have probably come here days ago already when she had been all alone with this messy situation.

Now she wasn’t alone anymore or at least she hoped so. Oliver had talked a lot about _them_ on the phone. Of course she hadn’t missed that because how could she have missed that after he had talked about what _she_ was going to do and what _she_ wanted and what _she_ had to decide all the time before?

Hopefully he meant what he had said because Felicity wasn’t sure that she could handle him walking out on her again. The first two times had hurt enough.

She still couldn’t believe he had suggested having the baby and raising him or her together. When he had told her that he would like to share his decision with her, she had immediately feared that he would maybe suggest an abortion. He had been so distanced since the day they had found out about the pregnancy that she hadn’t thought he would change his mind so drastically. It was probably why she still didn’t let herself really believe it.

These last days she had thought a lot about what to do. Maybe being all alone with the decision had had its good, too, because with nobody there to guide her she had had no choice but to figure out what she really wanted to do. Only slowly it had become clear that everything else aside and all the difficult circumstances ignored what she wanted to do was-

“Hey.”

Gasping for breath, Felicity flinched and hastily turned her head around. Oliver was standing several feet away from her with hunched shoulders and his hands pushed into the pocket of his jeans. He looked just as uncomfortable as he had looked when they had last met in school.

“Hi,” Felicity whispered back quietly.

She got up from the bench she had sat down on to watch the fishes while waiting for Oliver, but she didn’t approach him. Instead she stayed right at the bench and wrapped her arms around herself. She had done this rather often since she had found out that she was pregnant. At first she had believed that it was only because she was feeling cold when she was in an uncomfortable situation, but she actually wondered if it was like a maternal instinct to protect her baby from situations that might cause stress to him or her.

“Can I,” Oliver started before he made a long pause, gesturing towards her insecurely, “hug you?”

Felicity hesitated, biting down on her bottom lip. She had longed for Oliver’s strong arms being wrapped around her and spending her comfort. Laurel’s silent comfort those last days had helped her getting through the worst, but what she had really needed had been Oliver or at least someone close who knew about her problem. Felicity just wasn’t sure if she could accept that hug now. He had left her twice, and she didn’t know if she could trust him not to leave again.

“I understand if you-“

“No, it’s okay,” Felicity hastily interrupted him, unable to take the hurt expression in his face. “Of course you can… hug me.”

“You’re sure?” Oliver asked, ducking his head a little. “I really understand if you don’t want to. After everything…”

Felicity loosened her arms from around her middle and moved her hands through her hair. Shaking her head, she released a sad chuckle before she asked, “Why is this so awkward? I mean… I kind of know why it is so awkward, but given the big picture and not only the situation of the last days it really shouldn’t be and-“

Her babble came to a sudden stop when Oliver crossed the distance between them and pulled her against his chest. His arms wrapped around her waist tightly to pull her even closer, and Felicity almost melted against him. She snuggled her cheek up to his chest and wrapped her arms around his middle. She used the hold she had on him to push herself closer to the comforting warmth of his body. Only now that she could smell the scent of his skin and listen to the beat of his heart did she realize how much she had really missed him and how much she had really needed him.

“I’m so sorry for leaving you alone with this,” Oliver whispered and pressed his lips against her forehead in a comforting kiss. “I’m so sorry.”

Felicity took in a slightly sniffling breath, feeling tears springing into her eyes. Not having Oliver by her side hadn’t only been hard because of the circumstances surrounding her though that had definitely been the worst part. It had also been hard because she loved him, and the time they had spent apart had felt like a break-up.

“I’m so sorry,” Oliver whispered again, stroking his hand over her hair. He kissed her forehead again, whispering once more, “I am so sorry.”

Felicity had her eyes squeezed shut, and she pressed her nose closer to his chest, breathing in the scent of his skin. It took awhile before she found comfort in it and felt herself calming down, but eventually she whispered, “It’s okay. You had a lot to process.”

“That’s no excuse,” Oliver answered, and Felicity didn’t miss the huskiness in his voice. “I still should have stayed.”

When he loosened himself from the hug, Felicity immediately took a step back, thinking the moment was over. Oliver put his hands to her cheeks, framing her face, though. He looked at her intensely while wiping the few tears that had escaped her eyes away with his thumbs.

“Felicity, I am so sorry,” he repeated once more. “Leaving you alone with this was cowardly, and… I promise I will never do it again. I will do whatever it takes to make it up to you if you give me another chance. Do you think you could give me another chance?”

Felicity gulped. The way Oliver looked at her seemed to burn right under her skin. The expression in his eyes was a sincere one. She believed him when he said that he wanted to make up for leaving her, and that he didn’t plan on leaving her again. The only problem was that it wasn’t about planning or not planning to leave. Oliver hadn’t left her because he had planned on doing so. He had left because he had been scared, and his fear hadn’t allowed him to stay with her. So it was actually about whether she could trust that he would do his best to not allow his fear to make him run away again no matter the obstacles.

“I would at least like to try,” Felicity whispered, snuggling her face into his touch. “I don’t want to do this alone.”

“You’re not going to do this alone,” Oliver replied. He kissed her forehead once more before he looked her in the eyes again and nodded to the bench behind her. “Should we sit down?”

When Felicity nodded, Oliver lowered his hands from her face, linked their fingers and led her to the bench. He sat down on it sidewise with one leg to each side of it, and Felicity followed his example and did the same. They stayed both quiet for some time, just holding hands and looking at each other.

“What you said before on the phone,” Felicity started after awhile, hastily taking a look around to make sure the few people around them were focused on watching the animals instead of listening to teenagers discussing their problems, “about keeping the baby, did you mean it?”

“I meant what I said about supporting whatever decision you have made,” Oliver said. When he saw that she was about to protest and ask him to answer her question, he squeezed her fingers and added, “And I also meant what I said about keeping the baby, yes. I want to take responsibility for- okay, no, that sounds wrong. I- I know we’re young, but we love each other, and I think we can do it and-“

“How?” Felicity interrupted him quietly. “How do you think we can do this? We are still going to school. We want to go to college. We-“

Oliver squeezed her fingers once more, making her stop midsentence, just looking at him. She had a thousand questions about that plan because it wasn’t like you could just decide to try raising a baby. This decision required so much responsibility, much more responsibility than some adults could raise actually. How were they supposed to that?

“I don’t know how we will do this,” Oliver explained her.

Felicity snorted. Of course he had just suggested doing this without really thinking about it, she thought. Oliver was the kind of person who closed his eyes and jumped. He followed his feelings and let them guide his actions. This wasn’t a decision to make with gut instinct, though. You didn’t decide about raising a child with gut instinct.

She was just about to tell Oliver exactly that when he asked her instead, “What do you want?”

“What?”

“Before I told you that I would like us to raise this baby together, you said that you think you have made your decision,” he reminded her, “but you haven’t told me what your decision is, yet.”

Felicity lowered her gaze to their joint hands, biting down on her bottom lip.

Being alone had helped her figuring out what she thought she should do or what she wanted to do or whatever else to call it. She didn’t trust her decision, though. There was no good reason for her decision, and Felicity didn’t trust decisions made with gut instinct. She trusted her brain to make the right decisions. Deciding with gut instinct was influenced on too many levels. What if you were hungry or had eaten too much? You could make the wrong decision and end up doing something you would forever regret or-

“Fe-li-ci-ty,” Oliver interrupted her interior babble in that gentle tone that she loved so much. When she looked at him, she saw him watching her and felt herself blushing in response. “I can see the words rushing through your mind.”

“How can you be so calm?” Felicity asked with a sigh. “How can you just say that you want us to do this and think that it will be okay? Having and raising this baby is what I want to do, too. Or at least I think it’s what I want to do, but I am scared and-”

“So am I,” Oliver assured her, squeezing her hands in support. “I am scared, too. I am scared, and it made me run, but… I came back. I don’t want to run from this. I want to do this with you if you want to.”

Felicity took in a deep breath. “I am so scared of this, Oliver.”

“We can be scared together.”

Felicity huffed out a breathy laugh, shaking her head. “This is crazy.”

“Maybe it is,” Oliver replied. He reached out his hand and tugged a strand of her blonde hair behind her ear. His fingertips grazed the soft skin of her cheeks shortly before they moved back to her hands in the small room between them. “There is no rational decision to this, though. At least I don’t see any way that we could rationally decide about this, so when you and I separately come to the same decision-“

“It has to be because my brain is going crazy because of the hormones.”

She watched Oliver’s face freezing while he was looking at her with an insecure expression in his eyes, unsure if he was supposed to be hurt or supposed to smile. Only when Felicity smiled teasingly, did he smile, too. He tickled her sides slightly, asking, “Are you getting cheeky?”

“Never!”

Oliver put his hands to the back of her knees and pulled her closer until her legs were over his. He wrapped his arms around her waist and slid even closer to her. Felicity felt her heartbeat fastening at the way he was looking at her.

“It’s good to see you smile again,” Oliver whispered, leaning his forehead against hers. “How are you feeling?”

Felicity took in a deep breath, considering her words carefully, before she answered, “I feel better, at least a little. I am still scared, though, and unbelievable tired.”

Closing her eyes, Felicity sighed. She really hadn’t slept much lately. With the hormones and the worries about the future there hadn’t been any way for her to really relax. Maybe now that she at least knew that she had Oliver’s support in her crazy plan to raise the baby she would be able to sleep a little bit more. On the other hand now that she knew that she would at least try to have and raise this baby, there were like thousands of other worries and questions that had to be answered.

How was she going to tell her family? What would she do if Quentin left because he didn’t want to put up with a pregnant teenager? How would she manage to keep this a secret in school? How was she going to raise this child once it was born? Where would they live, and-

“How about we go home to me, and you just sleep in my arms for a few hours?”

“What about your parents? Or Thea?” Felicity asked back immediately.

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “They will find out about us when I tell them about the pregnancy, anyway. We can try to enjoy a moment of us just being a normal teenage couple first, though.”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, looking at Oliver hesitatingly, unsure of how to start what she felt she needed to say. Oliver cocked his head in question, probably seeing the struggle in her eyes. He didn’t push her to say anything, though. Instead he just waited for her to talk.

“I still don’t want anyone to know about us,” she stated after awhile, watching Oliver lean back and frown at her.

“Felicity, we’re having a baby.”

“I know,” she replied hastily. “I know that. I just think that… I think that my reasons for keeping us a secret aren’t changed by this. Actually the circumstances are only intensifying my reasons for not wanting anyone to know about us. The nerdy new girl gets knocked up by the captain of the football team – it’s the worst cliché of them all. If people find out about this before the finals which I really don’t hope will happen-”

“There are still several months to the finals. How do you think you will keep this a secret for so long?”

“-they will talk, and it will only be worse if they know that you’re the father.”

“At least I could be there for you,” Oliver replied. “How am I supposed to help you getting through this when I am not allowed to show people that we belong together and we decided to have this baby together?”

“Oliver-“

“What are you going to tell your parents, then?” he asked. “You can’t just tell them that you’re pregnant and not tell them who the baby’s father is. They will want to know and-“

“Okay, okay, stop,” Felicity demanded, holding her hands in front of herself and squeezing her eyes shut. Her head was throbbing painfully, and her heartbeat had fastened so much that it stole her breath and hurt in her chest.

She had known that Oliver wouldn’t be too happy about her suggestion. He hadn’t been happy about keeping their relationship a secret in the first place. He had accepted it, but he hadn’t liked it. Of course he didn’t want to continue keeping it a secret now under these new circumstances. Felicity felt that it was the right thing to do, though.

A pregnant classmate was going to raise questions, but a teenager being knocked up by someone like Oliver Queen was going to be crazily interesting. Within seconds everyone in school would now and sooner or later probably the whole city if not even the whole nation. The Queen family was in the gossip magazines regularly, so if the media found out about this, they would write about it, and Felicity didn’t think she could deal with that.

“I’m sorry,” Oliver whispered after awhile, taking her hands from where they were still held in front of herself to make him stop. “I didn’t mean to… I’m sorry.”

Hesitatingly Felicity opened her eyes, looking at him.

“I know you want to support me,” she said quietly, tears springing into her eyes, “but I think people knowing you’re the father will only make it worse.”

Oliver lowered his gaze, obviously hurt by her words. Felicity felt guilty, but she didn’t want to lie to him about it. She really thought that it was only going to be worse.

“I will avoid the question of who the father is. My mom will understand. She raised me on her own. Once finals are over, I am going to tell them. I promise.”

“That’s still a long time to go.”

“We managed to keep it a secret until now. We will manage to do it until finals are over.”

“Can’t we at least tell our parents?” Oliver asked. “They won’t tell anyone.”

“Your father is going to kill you, and if he won’t, Quentin will,” Felicity replied. “I don’t- I don’t know. My parents will hate you, and your parents will hate me, and everything will be even messier than it is already, so…”

Oliver didn’t look happy. He looked everything but happy to be exact.

Felicity took in another breath. “I understand if you want to tell them, though, and I am not going to force you to-“

“No, it’s okay,” Oliver replied, shaking his head. “If you don’t want anyone to know, nobody will know.”

“You’re sure?”

Oliver nodded. “I promised to support all of your decisions, and this is one of them. We won’t tell anyone until you’re ready.”

“Thank you,” Felicity whispered, smiling in relief. She hastily wiped a tear that was rolling down her cheek away and took in a deep breath before she breathed out slowly, feeling herself calming down.

“So what now?” Oliver asked.

“I would still like to sleep,” Felicity replied. “I’m so tired.”

Oliver smiled at her sympathetically and got up, holding out his hands for her.

“How about we forget all the worries for some hours, drive somewhere where there is only us and we can cuddle on the back seat of my car, so you can sleep a little?”

“Sounds like a good idea,” Felicity replied with a tired smile.

She put her hands into his and got up, too. Oliver linked their fingers and was already taking the first step to head towards the exit, but Felicity stayed where she was. She bit down on her bottom lip hesitatingly, eying Oliver up.

“Something wrong?” Oliver asked when he noticed her gaze, and he turned back around, so he was standing right in front of her. His right hand still held hers, while his left hand rested on her hip.

“I- uhm… I should probably make an appointment with a doctor for a check-up and make sure the baby is okay, so… would you like to come with me?”

Oliver blinked several times. “Do you want me to come with you?”

“I’d really like you to, yes,” Felicity replied, “but if you think this would be awkward-“

“No, no,” Oliver replied immediately, “not at all. I- I would like to go with you.”

Felicity nodded slowly, watching Oliver. “It’s still awkward, isn’t it?”

“It’s a very new situation for both of us,” Oliver replied with a nod of his head. “We just need to get used to this.”

“Yeah,” Felicity replied with a quiet sigh. “I guess you’re right.”

“I know something that could help us, though.”

“And what would that-?”

Felicity stopped when Oliver leaned in for a kiss. His lips didn’t touch hers, though. They stopped only a breath away. It was the same thing he had always done at the very beginning of their relationship when he hadn’t been sure if he was allowed to kiss her. For a short second Felicity felt the need to look around and make sure that they weren’t watched, but the Aquarium had always been a safe place for them. Nobody they knew came here. Most of the people who came here were either kids or older people, and neither of them cared about them.

So Felicity crossed the last distance between them and kissed Oliver gently. It only took two seconds before her arms wrapped around his neck, and she pushed herself closer to him, deepening the kiss by slipping her tongue into his mouth.

God, she had missed him! She hadn’t even realized how much she had really missed him until now. The realization made her melt against Oliver even more.

When their lips parted, Oliver rested his forehead against hers, nuzzling her nose with his.

“We will do this together, right?” Oliver asked.

“Yes,” Felicity answered with a smile and sighed quietly, “together.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am now also on twitter, using the same username as here! In case someone is interested. ;)


	4. Chapter 4

While they were wordlessly strolling down the sidewalk towards the bus stop, Oliver watched Felicity closely. She had her head lowered, looking at the floor. Her hair had fallen forward, looking like a veil that hid her face behind it. He didn’t need to see her face completely to know that her thoughts were running wild, though.

“Are you okay?” he asked quietly, not taking his eyes off of her.

“Sure,” Felicity replied. She glanced at him shortly before looking back down to the floor. She gestured around her head, adding, “Just a lot of things going on in here.”

Oliver nodded slowly, unsure of what to say or whether or not to say anything at all. Felicity was usually the one who talked because he just wasn’t that good with words. Hesitatingly, Oliver reached out his fingers for her hand. Though as soon as his skin made contact with hers, Felicity pulled her hand away and took a step to the side and away from him. Ignoring the stitching pain in his heart at her rejection, he pushed his lips together and pushed his hands into the pockets of his jeans.

These last eight days since they had met at the Aquarium and decided to have the baby and at least try to raise him or her together, Oliver had done his best to try making up for having left before. He had texted her several times a day, asking if she was alright or if she needed anything. He had listened to her telling him about her fears and reassured her as much as possible. He had even left their biology class right after her when she had excused herself to go to the toilet because he had known that she had been feeling nauseous. He had followed her to the girls’ washroom where he had held her hair and rubbed her back while she had thrown up.

Obviously Felicity still hadn’t completely forgiven him for walking out on her.. He had no right to be mad or even disappointed because he knew rebuilding the trust he had destroyed would take time, but her rejection still hurt him. How could he be there for her and support her in this when she wouldn't allow him to be close to her?

“It’s not-“ Felicity started in a whisper but stopped and looked around shortly. “Just not here.”

Oliver frowned, looking around like she had done shortly. The street around them wasn’t exactly devoid of people, but it wasn’t busy, either. Situations like these had never been a problem for them. Maybe it had been a little bit like playing with fire given that they could have easily run into someone from school, but they had to allow themselves to show affection in places where it wasn’t just them at least sometimes. Keeping their relationship a secret at school was hard enough.

“Felicity, there is nobody here who knows us.”

“We could run into someone we know, though,” she replied. “I just… I don’t want anyone to know about us. You understand that, right?”

“I understand that, and I accept it, even if I don’t really like it,” Oliver replied. “I just think that we shouldn’t make it any harder than it already is. I mean… We shouldn’t exaggerate. We are a couple after all, right?”

He stopped and held out his hand for Felicity to take. Biting down on her bottom lip, she hesitated and took another look around. Only when Oliver cocked his head, did she step forward and take his hand. Her head came to rest on his forearm when they started walking again, and Oliver kissed the crown of her head.

“See, it isn’t that bad, hm?” he asked.

Felicity chuckled. “You know I didn’t refuse because I thought it would feel bad.”

“I know,” Oliver replied with a quiet sigh, “and like I said before, I accept your decision to continue keeping our relationship a secret. We will be careful, so nobody will find out, but we will not be paranoid and deny ourselves any form of affection. That wouldn’t be fair, okay? I- I just- I don’t want us to drive ourselves crazy over this.”

“You mean you don’t want me to drive you crazy over this, right?”

Now it was Oliver who had to chuckle. “You’re carrying my baby. I think you’re allowed to drive me crazy as much as you want.”

Only when the last syllable had been spoken, Oliver realized what he had said. It wasn’t missed by either of them, though, and it made an almost indescribable silence, neither awkward nor comfortable, settle between them.

“The first use of a possessive pronoun in relation to our baby,” Felicity stated. “A possessive pronoun is-“

“I know what a possessive pronoun is,” Oliver interrupted her, tickling her side in response to her teasing. “Thanks for your trust in my linguistic knowledge.”

Felicity chuckled, turning her head to press a kiss to his shoulder through the fabric of his dress shirt. Oliver squeezed her fingers, making sure she knew that he wasn’t mad.

“For the record I’d like to point out that it is _our_ baby, though.”

“Our baby,” Oliver repeated quietly.

It was indeed the first time one of them had talked about the baby as theirs. Until now it had only been ‘the baby’. Oliver had thought about the baby being his or theirs a few times, but he had never said it out loud. He wouldn’t have thought that it would feel like such a big step, but now that he had said it, he realized that maybe it was. It felt like he had only now completely accepted and processed that they were really having a baby.

They had just been to their first doctor appointment. At first there had been a short moment of shock when the doctor had explained to them that the usual pregnancy tests weren’t always a hundred percent reliable, and it was possible that Felicity might not even be pregnant. The doctor had taken an ultrasound, though, and that had confirmed that Felicity was indeed pregnant like they had thought she was.

Felicity was in her eleventh week of pregnancy to be exact. They had both been surprised that she was so far along already. Shouldn’t they, or at least she herself, have realized it sooner than only three weeks ago? But then it hadn’t been that surprising given that Felicity had had some benign bleedings during pregnancy that she had mistaken for her period and most of the pregnancy symptoms had made her thought she was just getting sick.

All the impressions the doctor’s appointment had made were still having a huge impact on him. The pregnancy being officially confirmed and the week of pregnancy being determined were only two of these. Even more impact had had seeing the first picture of their baby on the screen and later on the ultrasound pictures they had been given. As well as the sound of their baby’s heartbeat. Their baby, who was the size of a fig right now, had a heartbeat. It had sounded terrifyingly fast at first, but the doctor had told them that was perfectly normal.

“We’re really having a baby,” Oliver said after awhile.

“It still feels kind of unreal,” Felicity replied. “Having a baby…”

“I know.” Oliver squeezed her fingers in silent comfort, wordlessly letting her know that he knew she was worried about what their future would bring. “But just try to imagine what this will be like, the two of us and our baby.”

He looked at Felicity, seeing her smile with her eyes closed. She hadn’t been smiling much lately, and Oliver understood why. This situation was still scary as hell. They might have made their decision, but there were just so many more open-ended questions that needed to be answered, one scarier than the next. None of this was easy, so the sight of Felicity's smile made him smile and press his lips to the crown of her head.

It didn’t take long before the carefree expression disappeared from her face, though. She frowned and opened her eyes with a deep sigh.

“We still need to figure out how to make all of this work,” she whispered.

Oliver nodded. “I know. We’ll figure this out, though.”

“I’d like to have your confidence,” Felicity replied.

She sighed once more, taking a small step away from him, so her head wasn’t resting on his shoulder anymore. She was still holding his hand, though, and Oliver tightened his hold on her fingers, almost afraid she might pull her hand back.

“This is going to be difficult.”

“I know.”

“And it’s only getting more difficult when the baby is born.”

“I know.”

“Then how can you stay so calm?” she asked.

Felicity stopped, turned around to him with an expression that left no doubt that she was stressed and had no understanding for Oliver’s maybe a little bit too relaxed reaction. Oliver would be lying, if he said he really was as relaxed as he tried to seem.

“Look, I’m worried, too,” he told her, squeezing her fingers. “I just think all these worries are not going to take us anywhere.”

“You do realize that’s a kind of naïve way of thinking, right?” Felicity asked.

Oliver pressed his lips together, taking in a deep breath, before he answered, “We still have months to figure out how exactly we will handle this. For now we should concentrate on the decisions we’ve made and getting through the next few weeks and the next few steps. I don’t think rushing through all of this or worrying too much about it is good for you.”

Felicity cocked her head at him, and Oliver could literally feel the blush forming on his cheeks. He did realize that it sounded a little stupid and clichéd, but…

“Isn’t that what the guys on TV always say to their pregnant girlfriends or wives?”

“And do you know what the pregnant women reply to that?”

“That they’re pregnant and not sick?”

“Exactly.”

Oliver took in a deep breath before breathing out a deep sigh. He still had trouble figuring out what to say sometimes. He didn’t want Felicity to worry any more than she already was, but he didn’t want it to seem like he didn’t care or wanted to start their future without any serious thought, either. Obviously corny TV clichés did not work either.

“Oliver, are you still sure we should do this?” Felicity suddenly asked.

When he looked at her, he saw her biting down on her bottom lip while watching him carefully.

“Of cour-“

“Please think about it before you answer,” Felicity interrupted him hastily. “We are young. We both have plans for our future and having this baby is going to change everything. He or she will have an influence on the rest of our lives, unless we give him or her up for adoption of course. We haven’t really discussed that option yet, and I just want to make sure-“

“Felicity,” Oliver was now the one interrupting gently. He took a quick look around, making sure there weren’t any familiar faces around because he knew it would make Felicity feel safer, before he framed her face with his hands. His thumbs moved over her cheekbones slowly, stroking the soft skin. “Even if there is no rational reason, I know that I want this. I want you, and I want our baby, and I am willing to endure whatever struggles there will be.”

He heard Felicity breathing in deeply and watched her eyes watching him closely, searching for any kind of doubt in his face.

“I stand to everything I said,” he promised. “If you want to keep this baby, I’ll be there and help you raise it. We will do this together. If you don’t want to do this, though, I’ll help you through whatever it is you want to do.”

Felicity looked at him for a moment longer before she nodded slowly. Closing her eyes, she breathed out with another sigh. She snuggled her face into the palms of his hands.

“Sorry,” she said.

Oliver shook his head. “You don’t have to apologize to me. Ever.”

“I’m just… I’m still so scared.”

“So am I,” Oliver replied. “If you want to change our decision...“

“I don’t,” Felicity replied hastily. “I’m just scared we will regret this or fail at this.”

“I guess all we can do is try our best, right?” Oliver asked. “We have to trust that we can do this. Otherwise, it is meant to fail from the start. And if we realize that we can’t do this, we can still figure out what to do to change the situation.”

Felicity breathed in deeply, nodding slowly. “You’re right.”

She put her hands to his wrists and pulled his fingers away from her face. She held onto his left hand when they continued walking to the bus stop. Oliver didn’t miss how she looked around a little nervously once more.

“You do know that there aren’t a bunch of paparazzi following me all the time, right?” Oliver asked, cocking his head. “They are on the back of my neck once they catch me at a party or something, but they are not permanently following me. And I don’t think any of our classmates are here, either.”

Felicity closed her eyes and shook her head with a quiet chuckle. “I’m sorry. I’m just… I just don’t want anyone to know.”

Oliver nodded. “I know, and I promise you I will keep an eye on everything around to make sure nobody will find out before finals, but I don’t want you to drive yourself crazy, okay?”

“Because it’s not good for the baby?”

“Because I love you, and I don’t want you to be stressed.”

Smiling, Felicity stopped because they had arrived at the bus stop, and turned around to him, saying, “Very good answer.”

Oliver smiled back at her. “I’m trying.”

He knew none of this would be easy. Raising a baby was not easy. Adults were stretched to their limits with that, so he and Felicity would be, too. And yes, he was probably stumbling more into this than he was willing to admit, but he just knew that it was the right decision. If they really failed miserably at being parents, they would hopefully be able to admit this soon enough to spare their child a lot of suffering and give him or her to someone who would be a lot better at raising a child than they were. Oliver didn’t like that thought, but he felt it was necessary to keep it in mind. A back-up plan never hurt.

“You can go to your car, you know?” Felicity asked after awhile. “You don’t have to wait here with me.”

“I could also drive you home.”

“I already said ‘no’ to that.”

“Yes, you did,” Oliver replied with a sigh. “I’ll just wait the few minutes until the bus is here then, if you don’t mind.”

“I don’t mind,” Felicity replied with a smile. “I’d like it actually.”

Oliver shot a quick look around before he leaned forward and pecked Felicity’s lips shortly. He didn’t miss how she took a look around herself, still afraid they could have been seen. When her eyes met his again, he perked his eyebrows slightly upward, and Felicity breathed out with a sigh, closing her eyes.

“Sorry.” 

“You weren’t _that_ nervous before.”

“The situation is different now,” she explained, “and I guess as long as my family doesn’t know, we really should be as careful as possible.”

Oliver knew explaining to her once more that there was no need to worry that they were being watched all the time. She knew that he wasn’t Justin Bieber, luckily! He didn’t have a crowd of screeching girls or a wild mob of paparazzi behind him wherever he went. Felicity knew that, and still she felt uncomfortable.

“When are you going to tell them?” Oliver asked quietly, squeezing both her hands in silent support.

“Today,” Felicity replied after a short pause. “I think it’s about time.”

“Are you sure you don’t want me to come with you?”

“Oliver,” Felicity said pleadingly.

“I know,” Oliver replied with a sigh.

He knew that she didn’t want anyone to know about them again, and though he was sure he wouldn’t be able to convince her otherwise in the near future, he still felt the need to offer. It would be easier for both of them if they would do this together, _really_ together and not in secret. He wanted to be at her side. He didn’t want her to go through any of this alone. Since she did want to tell her family on her own, he wouldn’t fight her on it. The last thing he wanted to do, was make this situation even harder than it was already.

“Oliver?”

He looked up from the floor, ready to reassure her that it was okay if she wasn’t ready to tell her parents about them. Her voice had sounded so quiet and insecure that he had thought she might be worried that she had hurt him. When he looked at her, he saw tears in her eyes, though. He knew it had to be something more.

“Hey,” he said calmly, putting his hand on her cheek gently. “It’s normal to be scared, I guess. I don’t-“

“What if Quentin leaves?” she asked him and took in a sniffling breath.

Oliver wiped away the tear that had escaped the corner of her eye. He knew Quentin leaving Donna was one of her greatest fears. Getting to know Quentin had been what had really made Donna happy after her first husband had left Felicity and her. Felicity loved her mom, and she didn’t want to ruin her happiness, so of course she was scared that that was what would happen when she told her family about the pregnancy.

“Maybe you should talk to Laurel first,” Oliver suggested. “She helped you lately, didn’t she?”

“Because she didn’t know what was going on,” Felicity replied. “And I don’t think I can gather the courage to say that out loud to them twice. I want to get this over with, but I am so scared that our decision is going to cause problems for the people around us. I mean we made our decision, but we didn’t think about how this could affect our families, or actually we did think about it, but didn’t let that influence our decision and-“

“Okay, listen,” Oliver interrupted her gently, framing her face with both of his hands. “When any of that happens, you will call me, and I’ll come get you.”

“Come get me?” Felicity repeated.

“Yes,” Oliver replied seriously. “If you are scared that our decision will hurt your mom, or any of the other people we love, then we will go somewhere nobody knows us.”

“And where will that be?”

“Bali.”

“Bali?” Felicity asked, cocking her head and perking her eyebrows. “Really?”

“Yeah,” Oliver replied. “Nobody knows us there. And just think about spending each and every day in the sun with the warm beach beneath our naked feet and-“

“What about school?”

“Who needs school?” Oliver asked back, not even trying to hide his grin anymore. “We’re gonna live off of nothing but love and lust.”

Now Felicity burst into laughter and rested her forehead against his chest, saying, “You’re impossible!”

Oliver wrapped his arms around her waist and pressed a kiss to the top of her head, enjoying how close she was to him. The moment didn’t last long, though, because Felicity took a step back and just looked at Oliver.

“You do know that this is not really helping, right?”

“At least you smiled for a short moment,” Oliver replied, shrugging his shoulders. He glanced over her head, seeing her bus coming. “Just… You will tell your family, and as soon as you do, you will call me, and we see what we have to do next, okay?”

Felicity nodded slowly. “Okay.”

“You can call me any time, okay?”

“Okay.”

Oliver pulled her back against his chest for short moment, hugging her tightly and pressing a kiss to the top of her head.

“Don’t forget that you’re not alone,” Oliver whispered. “I love you, and we’re doing this together.”

“Together,” Felicity repeated with a nod of her head.

Oliver leaned forward and kissed her gently. His tongue slipped into her mouth, massaging hers. When he pulled away a little, he let his lips linger right above hers, not touching them. He brushed his lips against hers once more before he pulled away completely, taking a step back just in time to see the bus stop behind her.

“Call me when you told them… or when you need me,” Oliver suggested. “Or whenever else you want to.”

Felicity smiled and shortly and straightened up onto her tiptoes to peck his lips.

“I love you,” she whispered.

“I love you, too.”

Oliver stayed where he was, watching Felicity sit down right next to one of the windows. He lifted his hand to wave goodbye and smiled shortly when she did the same. He looked after the bus when it drove away, sending a short prayer to heaven that it was going to be okay and most importantly she was going to be okay.

He needed her to be okay.

 

 

“You can do this,” she whispered to herself.

Closing her eyes, she leaned back against the wall right next to the door and took in a deep breath. Her hands were still shaking wildly like they had already done when she had been doing the dishes after dinner. Laurel had probably noticed. At least Felicity had assumed that from the worried glances she had shot her, but neither Felicity nor Laurel herself had said a word about it.

Felicity took in another deep breath. She knew she had to tell them now. The longer she waited, the harder it would get. She had waited a long time already, or at least it felt like that, since she had known about the pregnancy for several weeks now.

“You can do this,” Felicity whispered to herself once more before she opened her eyes and hastily stepped into the living room before her painstakingly gathered courage could leave her again.

Immediately all eyes focused on her, and the conversations ran dry abruptly before she had even said a word. Quentin had put an arm on the backrest of the couch behind Donna while they were looking at the photos in one of the albums Donna had put together. Laurel was sitting on the armrest next to her father, leaning over to take a look at the photos, too. Sara was sitting crouched on the other side of the couch, typing on her phone.

“Everything okay, honey?” Donna asked, cocking her head and smiling at her daughter.

Felicity gulped, feeling her heartbeat speeding up so much, it was a miracle her breathing didn’t get erratic and she didn’t hyperventilate. Instead she was still breathing in and out slowly.

“I- uhm… I need to tell you something,” she stated.

Donna closed the photo album in her lap, looking at her instead. Quentin just perked his eyebrows a little, and Sara put her phone away on the small table next to her. Laurel was the one who looked the most worried. Given that Felicity had already told her stepsister that something was wrong, even if she had kept everything else for herself, it shouldn’t be too surprising.

“What’s wrong?” Donna asked. “You’ve been a little out of yourself lately. Is there something going on in school or-“

“No, it’s not about school,” Felicity interrupted her mother quickly. She closed her eyes for a short moment, taking in another breath before she opened her eyes again and said, “I’m pregnant.”

Felicity didn’t know what she had expected. She had tried to avoid thinking too much about her family’s reaction, knowing most scenarios would just scare the hell out of her. Anyway, she hadn’t expected that long moment of silence that followed. The faces of her family looked like they were frozen. They didn’t show any emotion – neither surprise or anger or disappointment. They were almost empty, staring at her like they hadn’t heard what she had said. What Felicity had expected even less, though, was the sudden laughter that came from Sara.

“For a short second you had me fooled, sis. I actually thought-“ she choked out between more laughter before she looked around quickly, and her eyes widened in realization. “Wait! This is not a joke?”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, shaking her head. She wrapped her arms around herself protectively while she was waiting for the realization to settle in for all of them. It didn’t take too long.

“Oh my God!” Sara called out, her eyes widening even more.

“How could that happen?” Quentin asked.

“But you don’t even have a boyfriend,” Donna stated.

“How long have you know about this?” Laurel asked.

“And how far along are you?” Donna asked.

“Have you seen a doctor already?”

“Who’s the father?”

“What will you do now?”

“What about school?”

“Didn’t you use protection?”

“Are you really sure you’re not just late on your period?”

They bombarded her with more and more questions, one following the other even more quickly than before. There was a buzzing feeling in her head that made her screw her eyes shut and massage her temples with the tips of her fingers. She had known that this news would raise a lot of questions. She just hadn’t thought that it would be so many questions all at once.

“Okay, stop,” she said when she couldn’t take it anymore. She kept her eyes closed, breathing in and out slowly, and waited until neither of them was saying anything more. Only then did she open her eyes. “I know this is a… shock. It was a shock for me, too, but I had a few weeks-“

“Weeks?” Donna asked in surprise, looking at Quentin for help, and he took her hand.

The sight made Felicity’s tension ease slightly. He only held her hand, but at least he didn’t close himself off already. She just had to trust her stepfather enough to not leave once all the facts were on the table.

Felicity took in a deep breath, starting once more, “I had a few weeks to think about this, and I… I know this might be a mistake, and maybe you will think that I am crazy, but I decided to have the baby and raise it on my own.”

And again silence settled. Felicity felt her stomach twisting painfully from the fear of what would happen. She had had terrible nightmares about this.

“What about the baby’s father?” Donna asked.

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip again. She had thought about what to say about that all day. She knew Oliver wanted her to tell her family about them, so she had seriously considered it once again. The problem was still the same, though. Once they knew about him, they would tell his parents, and they would probably ground him forever or send him to a boarding school for the rest of the year, given his father didn’t kill him the second he heard. Sooner or later, the gossip media would hear, so she would be without Oliver’s direct support and with paparazzi following her. She didn’t think she could take that.

Unfortunately, the fact that she knew she couldn’t tell them about Oliver didn’t mean that she knew what else to say to them.

“I- I don’t want to talk about him,” Felicity said, wrapping her arms around her more tightly.

“Does he know you’re pregnant?” Quentin asked.

“Yes, but-“

“So he doesn’t care?” Donna now asked again. “We have to-“

“Mom, I said I don’t want to talk about him. At least not yet,” Felicity explained, looking at her for a long moment. “I thought at least you’d understand that.”

She knew it was a cheap shot because her mother had suffered a lot when Felicity’s father had left, but Felicity was desperate to keep the situation between her and Oliver a secret. And she really thought her mother might get that. She never talked with Felicity about her father, either. Donna had to know what it meant to think it was better not talking about your child’s father. Admittedly, this didn’t really apply to her and Oliver since she was just waiting for the right time to come, but she just had to let her mother believe that their situations were the same for now.

Sara and Laurel both had their gazes lowered, not daring to look at mother and daughter fighting like that. Quentin squeezed his wife’s fingers, shooting Felicity a strict look that almost made her take her words back. Just like the hurt expression in Donna’s face almost made Felicity want to take it back. Donna gulped and took in a deep breath, tears springing to her eyes.

“Okay,” Donna said after a short moment. “What about your future then? What about your last year of high school? What about your plans? You wanted to go to MIT.”

“I can… do that with the baby,” Felicity answered, not missing the doubts in her voice.

Yes, Felicity had always wanted to go to MIT and have at least some kind of career. She would need college for that, and she knew that college was hard. College with a baby was probably even harder, maybe too hard for her or rather them. She knew all that, and maybe she had some doubts about their decision, but there were so many people who had doubts when they were having a baby, so Oliver was right. They owed themselves to at least try. They would have to find a way to make it work somehow.

“You are going to just do it?” Donna asked, tension audible in her voice.

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. She knew she should have probably made a full plan about how she wanted to do this, but she hadn’t been ready for that yet. There hadn’t even really been time for that yet.

“You raised me on your own. You kind of even did that before dad left and-“ Felicity stopped when her mother suddenly got up from the couch and with a wild shake of her head and went past her. “Mom?”

“I can’t do this,” Donna whispered, not looking back.

The painful twist in her stomach became even more painful. If she didn’t know that it was caused by the emotional stress of the situation, she might actually fear to have a miscarriage. Felicity didn’t know what a miscarriage felt like, but she kind of imagined it would feel like this. She was in pain, and she felt nauseated.

This was the third time a person she loved was walking out on her in less than a month. How much more was she supposed to take?

Slowly, Felicity turned back around to where Laurel, Quentin and Sara were still sitting on the couch. Neither of them said a word. Sara was looking down at her hands in her lap. Laurel looked at her father intensely like she was trying to hypnotize him into doing something. Quentin seemed insecure about what to do, though. So he didn’t do anything.

Felicity felt tears streaming down her cheeks. She should probably be used to this feeling already. Oliver had walked out on her and let her alone with-

When Felicity heard steps coming closer behind her she quickly spun around. For a split second she saw her mother standing in the doorframe, looking at her with tears in her eyes. Before she could say anything, though, her mother had already run towards her and pulled her into a tight hug. Both of their bodies were shaking as they cried in each other’s arms.

Felicity didn’t know how much time had passed when Donna pulled away and out of the hug. She framed her daughter’s face with gentle hands and wiped away some of the tears on Felicity’s cheeks while she was looking at her with tears in her own eyes.

“This is not going to be easy, hon,” she said and took in a sniffling breath. “This really is not going to be easy. This decision might ruin your life and everything you have worked on. You should consider giving the baby away for adoption and-“

“Mom,” Felicity whispered, lowering her gaze. Disappointed by her mother’s words, Felicity tried to move out of her touch, but Donna didn’t let her move away.

“-seriously reconsider if you want and think you can raise this baby on your own,” Donna just continued, “but if that will still be your decision, I“ - Donna shot a short glance to somewhere behind her daughter where Felicity knew Quentin had to be. - “or rather we will accept this.”

“Really?” Felicity asked with small voice.

“Well, you’re no little girl. I raised you to make your own decisions and to make smart decisions,” Donna replied, “so I… I will do my best to accept that you are making your own decisions, even if I am not sure they are right.”

“Thank you, mom,” Felicity replied, swiftly wrapping her arms around her mother again. She hid her face against the side of Donna’s neck, feeling new tears springing to her eyes. A sob escaped her lips before she whispered desperately, “Thank you, mom. Thank you. Thank you so much.”

Felicity barely realized that her mother started crying again, too. She also did not realize that Quentin had approached them. Only when one of his strong arms wrapped around her, did she notice it. She looked at him with tear-filled eyes, mouthing a ‘thank you’ that didn’t even come close to how grateful she was that he wouldn’t leave them but stick with them through this. Quentin pressed his lips to her temple before lowering his lips to her mother’s hair, just holding both of them.

 

 

Almost one hour later Felicity climbed upstairs, and given how heavy her legs felt, it really seemed like a climb. She had explained to her family that she didn’t want anyone in school to know, and they had agreed that maybe keeping it a secret until after finals might be the best idea. Of course Donna had reminded her that she still had a lot of time and could think about maybe giving the baby away for adoption after it was born. Felicity had nodded, telling herself that of course her mother needed time before she could accept that Felicity really had made her decision already.

As relieving as telling her family had been, it had been exhausting, too. She had already been tired before, and she was even more tired right now. All she wanted to do was get into bed and sleep late tomorrow. She really needed to catch up on some sleep.

She reached into the back pocket of her jeans, pulling out her phone, and her eyes widened slightly when she saw that she had eight messages and three missed calls from Oliver. She had switched off her phone before she had been talking to her family. She hadn’t wanted to be interrupted in the middle of telling them the news.

Though all she wanted to do was sleep, she knew Oliver would worry when she didn’t call him back like she had promised she would. With a low sigh of exhaustion, Felicity lay down on her bed and dialed Oliver’s number.

“Felicity?” he asked as soon as the call had gone through.

“Hey, everything alright?” she asked. “You left me like a dozen messages.”

“Yeah, sorry, I- uhm… I was worried because I didn’t hear anything of you for so long. Are you okay?”

“I’m tired,” Felicity replied honestly, closing her eyes, “but I’m fine.”

“So they didn’t freak out?”

“At least not as much as I feared they would.”

For a short moment it was quiet at the end other end. She could hear Oliver take in a deep breath of relief, though, before he asked, “So they’ll support us… or you at least?”

“I’m not sure about that. My mom promised to accept my decision, whatever it will be, but I had to promise her to reconsider giving the baby away for adoption. She thinks that would be the best way to handle this.” Felicity could feel Oliver’s hesitation and hastily added, “I needed to promise her, but… I don’t think I will change my mind. I’ve thought about this for so long, and…”

“You know I will support you, even if you change your mind, and I am here for you whatever you need.”

Felicity smiled. “Yes. Thank you. For now all I need is some sleep.”

“Okay,” Oliver whispered. “In that case I will not keep you awake any longer.”

“Okay,” Felicity replied, getting up from the bed and strolling to the door. Goo-“

“One last question please?”

“Sure.”

“What did you tell them about the baby’s father?”

Felicity bit her tongue, trying to figure out what was the best way of telling him without hurting his feelings.

“I told them that I didn’t want to talk about him, so technically I didn’t lie about it. At least I think I didn’t. I am just… keeping it a secret.” Felicity opened the door and took a quick look around, making sure Laurel and Sara hadn’t come upstairs yet, and her way to the bathroom was free. She didn’t want to run into anyone in her family. With the door handle still in her hand she stayed where she was, though. “I know you’d like me to tell them, but-“

“I understand,” he interrupted her though he still sounded disappointed. “You tell them when you’re ready.”

“Thank you.”

“Not for that,” Oliver replied. “I love you. Night, Felicity.”

“Night, Oliver.”

Sighing, Felicity hung up and put her phone to the small dresser next to the door. Stepping out of her bedroom, she looked up and gasped for breath when she found Sara standing only a couple of feet away with her eyes wide open.

“Oliver?” her stepsister asked in a shocked whisper. “Oliver?!”

“What about Oliver?” Laurel asked in a whisper when she came upstairs, too. She frowned. “What Oliver are we even talking about? And why are we whispering?”

“Felicity just-“

Quickly, Felicity grabbed her stepsisters’ wrists and pulled both of them into her room, kicking the door shut behind her before Sara could say anything more.

“Oliver? Please say it was not the Oliver I think it was,” Sara asked, and Felicity bit down on her bottom lip guiltily. “Oh my god.”

“Okay, what’s going on here?” Laurel asked, looking from Felicity to Sara and back to Felicity again.

Felicity hadn’t wanted anyone to find out. She still didn’t want anyone to know, but given what Sara had probably just heard, Felicity knew that she had no choice. There was no lie or excuse good enough to talk her way out of this. Taking in a deep breath, she stated, “Oliver is the baby’s father.”

“Oliver as in Oliver Queen?” Laurel asked, perking her eyebrows.

Felicity nodded.

“Please say you didn’t fall for his stupid pickup lines and-“

“It’s not like that,” Felicity interrupted Sara hastily. “Oliver and I love each other. We’re together. We've been together for months.”

“And now he broke up with you because of the baby?” Laurel asked.

“Didn’t sound like they were broken up on the phone,” Sara stated.

Sighing, Felicity closed her eyes for a short moment before she explained, “No, we… We’re still together. Oliver and I will do this together.”

“Then why didn’t you tell your mother that?” Sara asked.

“Because he is Oliver Queen,” Felicity replied and as little as that sentence really said, Sara and Laurel both nodded, understanding exactly what it meant. Oliver Queen was more than a name, it was almost like a lifestyle. “I just don’t want anyone to know, not in school or nowhere else.”

“But your mom-“

“-would immediately call his parents, and it’s only a matter of time until something would be leaked,” Felicity interrupted Laurel. “I know it sounds stupid, but keeping it a secret is really better at this point. After our finals, I will tell mom and Quentin.”

Sara and Laurel exchanged a doubting gaze.

“I know it's crazy,” Felicity assured them again, “but… I don’t want to be the main subject of school gossip.”

“School gossip never stays with one topic for too long,” Sara replied. “When Nyssa and I had our coming out as a couple, they talked for a few weeks, but it was over relatively soon. Keeping it a secret might have seemed easier, but the few weeks of gossiping were nothing compared to how hard it was to keep it a secret. At least we could be together openly and didn’t have to hide anymore. Going through the lame gossiping is worth it.”

“I-“ Felicity started, shaking her head. “I can’t, Sara. If I don’t manage to hide the pregnancy until after finals, it will be hard enough. If anyone knows it’s Oliver’s baby… I don’t want to go through that because it’s not only the school gossip. It could be gossip media and god knows what else! Please don’t tell anyone. Not even our parents.“

Laurel and Sara exchanged gazes once more, wordlessly wondering what to do.

Felicity held her breath, waiting for them to decide. She knew that she was asking a lot of them, at least lying to their father was. She just didn’t want to think about what would happen if everyone would find out about this now. There was still so much time to go until the baby was born, and all the stress it would cause would distract her from graduation and-

“Okay,” Laurel said. “We’re not going to tell anyone.”

“Really?” Felicity asked.

“Really,” Sara replied.

“Thank you,” Felicity said, flinging her arms around her stepsisters' necks in relief. “Thank you so much.”

She knew she still had a long way to go. There were months separating her from finals and hence from when she could finally tell her parents about Oliver and let them know that she wasn’t going to do this alone. It also meant there were months that she needed to be very careful, so nobody would notice she was pregnant.

It was going to be hard, but she had Oliver and her sisters. And in some way she had her parents, too. She could do this. Step by step.


	5. Chapter 5

With a quiet sigh of tiredness Felicity closed the book in front of her and put it in to the little pile to her left, simultaneously pulling the last book she wanted to work through for today closer. She took the red pen she had been chewing on during these last seconds from between her lips and wrote down the title and author of the book.

She couldn’t help but smile to herself, thinking how easy everything actually was. It had been almost three months since she had found out about her pregnancy and almost two since she had told her family about it. Time was passing so quickly and to her surprise actually very quietly. It was all really weirdly easy.

Admittedly, she still had the most difficult time ahead of her. Felicity understood that. Since it was her first pregnancy, the bump was only growing slowly. Now at nineteen weeks it was showing, but luckily it was small enough for her to hide it beneath her large hoodies. It worked. The bump was invisible at school, so she could take her time and study for finals without the distraction of being the main subject of school gossip.

Felicity was determined to graduate school as well as she could. She had always been a good student, and she wouldn’t let her pregnancy change that about her. Besides, when she continued earning good grades in her last months of high school, her mother would hopefully realize that she could do this. Felicity really needed her mother to know that she could have this baby without throwing her life and everything she had worked on to fulfill her dreams away.

Donna hadn’t stopped suggesting adoption in the last weeks. Felicity got that. Her mother had imagined a different life for her daughter and felt like with having a baby she was ruining her life. Felicity knew in the back of her mind that it was very much possible that the baby would take away some of her chances, but she would prove to her mother that she wasn’t throwing everything away.

That was only part of the reason why she was in the library working her butt off all the time, though. Felicity felt the need to prove to herself that she could do this, too. The decision to have and to raise this baby hadn’t been easy, and sometimes she still felt the doubts sneaking up on her. With an excellent graduation she wouldn’t only prove to her mother but also to herself that she wasn’t limiting her chances as much as her mother tried to make her believe.

Oliver tried his best to take away her doubts, too. His reassurances were great. Whenever she doubted their decision, all she needed to do was call him, and he would talk to her and make her know that she wasn’t alone. It always worked. In the middle of one of her freak-outs his quiet and comforting words were what she needed. She also knew it wasn’t enough for the long run, though. For an acute freak-out Oliver was what she needed, but seeing the big picture, she knew she had to prove to herself that the decision had been right. Hopefully, that way the number of weekly freak-outs would decrease. The doctor had already complained about her blood pressure being too high.

Felicity sighed quietly before she bit down on her bottom lip. She hesitated for a short moment before she looked up from the book and took a quick look around in the library. Oliver often followed her to the library and watched her from his place a few tables away. Not today, though. He was busy with football training. She should probably be a relieved about that because working with Oliver’s gaze on her skin all the time really wasn’t easy, Felicity thought and lowered her gaze back to the book in front of her with another sigh.

Things between her and Oliver worked well. They still met in secret, and of course that kind of sucked, but with Sara and Laurel knowing about them there were just so many more opportunities to see each other. They didn’t have to wait until nobody was home or sneak out of the house and meet somewhere else all of the time. Instead they could meet at Felicity’s home as soon as Quentin and Donna were going out.

Seeing Oliver more often helped with everything. It helped her to relax, and it helped her to see how their lives might be in a couple of months. Oliver was… It was hard to put into words, but Felicity felt like he was doing everything he could to make up for leaving her before. He massaged her feet and her back when they were aching without her having to ask. He listened to her when she had worries and talked when Felicity didn’t know what to say. He also bought her dinner and ice cream and sweets and whatever else she craved. Though Felicity had mostly been spared from unpleasant side effects of the pregnancy, lately she often found herself craving certain food.

So Oliver really was the picture perfect boyfriend.

He still offered to take responsibility and officially stand up for her or rather them as the baby’s father. He never urged her into telling people, but Felicity could hear how desperately he wanted to do things right and wanted people to know that it was his baby in the desperate tone of his voice.

Oliver was still feeling guilty about leaving her, and Felicity was sure that was at least part of the reason why he wanted them to tell people already. He felt like he needed to take the responsibility now because he rejected it earlier. Felicity had told him over and over again that she really didn’t want anyone to know. Sara’s and Laurel’s shocked reaction and their still doubting looks whenever they saw Oliver were enough for her to know that she really didn’t want anyone else to know. Oliver had a certain reputation, and being the picture perfect boyfriend for the nerdy four-eyes and caring father for their bastard child did not work with that reputation.

Felicity shot a quick look around before shortly touching her bump, feeling the need to apologize to the baby for thinking about it as a bastard even if it was only from the perspective of someone else. She didn’t want her baby to feel unloved or unwanted, and she didn’t want him or her to be repressed by what other people might think about the circumstances that had created his or her life.

Felicity lowered her gaze to her hands on her stomach. If her bump should grow quickly after all, in a few weeks no hoodie would be wide enough to hide the bump. She had never been a popular girl in school, and right now she was even more relieved about that than usually. The more invisible she was the less people would realize that she was pregnant. If she was lucky, the few of her classmates who would notice the bump would just believe that she had gained a little weight. If she wasn’t that lucky, they would figure out what was going on with her. All Felicity could do was having hope they wouldn’t find out.

She would still worry about that when it happens, Felicity decided. She spent enough time worrying as it was already. So with a shake of her head, she pushed those thoughts away and glanced at her watch. Oliver’s training should be over by now, so he would probably take a quick shower and come here. Felicity just wasn’t sure that she’d still be awake until he had arrived. It was only five p.m., and she felt like she was already falling asleep. Her eyes were burning painfully, and her lids were falling shut every few seconds.

All she really wanted right now was to go home, lie down on her bed and sleep. If she did that, she wouldn’t have seen Oliver all day, though. There was a very important football game tomorrow, so the coach had decided to take the players off school for some extra training instead. The library had been their silver lining to see each other today since with the big game tomorrow Oliver couldn’t meet her later.

She really needed to sleep, though, so Felicity closed her book with a sigh. She would text Oliver later and suggest meeting on Sunday since tomorrow with the big game there definitely wouldn’t be time for each other once more. Today she just really needed to sleep. Tiredness was the one side effect of pregnancy that seemed to have accompanied her for the whole pregnancy up until now. Hopefully it would get better soon. She couldn’t stand this ongoing state of exhaustion much longer.

Felicity took her schoolbag from the seat next to her and got up. If she hurried, she could take the next bus and would be home in like ten minutes. In her hurry to lift the books against the side of her chest, she moved too quickly, though, and they ended up falling to the floor.

“Frack!” Felicity cursed in a hiss, not managing to move away fast enough for the books to not fall onto her feet. Now her feet hurt, and she was definitely going to miss the bus. She would have to wait twenty minutes for the next one instead. “Double frack!”

Sighing, she got down onto her knees and started piling up the books once again.

Today really wasn’t her day. First she had overslept and almost been too late for her English class and for the test they had taken this morning. During her lunch break she had wanted to text Oliver about how the first half of her day had been going because he loved regular updates about how she was feeling and what she was doing. He really had turned into a sap these last weeks! She had been so distracted by the book she had been reading, though, that she had almost sent the message to Barry, her partner for a presentation in their Biology class. And now this.

The sooner this day was over with her lying in bed and sleeping soundly the better.

When the books were piled back up again, Felicity lifted the pile from the floor and got back up. Sara, Laurel and Oliver would unanimously tell her to not carry that much weight. Like five moderately heavy books were too much for her to carry! They were ridiculously overpro-

Felicity’s thoughts came to a sudden stop. She had turned around to head towards the exit, almost bumping into Helena Bertinelli, one of Starling City High’s greatest or rather worst gossip girls. Once she knew something interesting, it was only a matter of time until everyone knew. When you wanted to spread news quickly, all you had tell her.

Oh, and if anyone would ever plan on doing a remake of _Mean girls,_ they should definitely seriously consider giving her the role of Regina George. One of the first things Felicity had learned about her was that she had bullied at least two girls that much they had decided to go to some other school instead, so from her first day in Starling City Felicity had done her best to avoid her. She had always done that but especially these last weeks.

Felicity was just about to say something lame as “Hi and bye” when she noticed that Helena had that venomous smile on her face that she always wore right before she… operated. She looked at her like a wild animal watched its prey right before it attacked. Felicity noticed that gaze or at least its meaning a little too late, though.

“I think this is yours,” Helena said, her evil grin widening. “Oops.”

Felicity froze at the sight of the ultra sound picture she had received during the first prenatal check-up two months ago in Helena Bertinelli fingers. She was holding it up at Felicity’s eye level, keeping it a little to the side of her face to make sure Felicity didn’t miss the grin that only seemed to widen more with every second.

She knew. Helena Bertinelli knew. She knew about the pregnancy.

The books glided out of her fingers and fell back down to her feet again as Felicity felt her heart stop beating before it started racing her chest. Her mind was running wild, trying to find something smart to say that would help getting her out of the situation without everyone knowing about the pregnancy. Instead her mind was blank. She was unable to think about anything in her panic. It nauseated her, choked her, paralyzed her.

For eight weeks everything had been going smoothly, too smoothly. Felicity knew it had been too smoothly. A teenage pregnancy was not something you were supposed to go through smoothly, and the trouble at the beginning of the pregnancy probably wasn’t enough. Naively she had hoped it would continue to go smoothly, though.

With Helena knowing about the pregnancy Felicity knew she could get that idea out of her head. Before the day was over, everyone would know about the baby. Everyone would know she was pregnant, and she’d be the main subject of school gossip for the next few months like she had feared. She’d get distracted by everyone talking about her, keeping her from graduating school as well as she knew she could. That was going to lead to her mother feeling vindicated about Felicity throwing her life away with the pregnancy and-

“Wow, you are not going to have the baby right now, are you?”

Not caring about the books she had dropped, Felicity tore the ultrasound picture from Helena’s fingers and started running towards the exit. She needed to be away from here before the news would spread like wildfire as she knew it would. Helena would message everyone in her contacts about what had just happened, and they would pass it on to all of their contacts and so on.

Felicity wasn’t sure if she was just paranoid, but she actually felt like a lot of people she was running past were already whipping out their phones. They seemed to shoot her judging looks while they were leaning over to their friends and starting to whisper to them. So if it wasn’t only Felicity’s paranoid mind making her feel like people were talking about her, the news was already spreading.

“Hey! No running in the library!” the librarian shouted after her when Felicity ran past the front desk to the door.

She tore open the door and ran outside. School was almost empty at this time on Friday, so luckily she wasn’t running into any more of her classmates who could look at her with judging eyes.

When she turned the corner, Felicity suddenly found herself running against something hard. She would have probably mistaken it for a wall if wasn’t for the familiar smell that came from it. In her try to pull back quickly, she almost slipped, and if it hadn’t been for two strong arms to wrap around her waist, she would have actually fallen to the floor.

“Hey, careful!” Oliver said with a quiet chuckle. “There’s a reason you-“

Still Felicity moved away quickly, making Oliver’s arms fall away from her body. She took several steps back, distancing herself from him, until her back hit the wall behind her. She looked at him with wide eyes like she had just seen a ghost, watching the smile fade from his lips and being replaced by an expression of worry. Her heart was racing in her chest, pounding against her ribs forcefully. She was out of breath, breathing quickly and loudly. Tears had streamed down her face and making it even harder to breathe.

“Felicity, what’s-“

“Do you really want to spend the rest of the evening in the library because I can tell-“

Felicity hastily turned her head and saw Tommy stepping out of the staircase. He stopped and perked his eyebrow when he saw Felicity, then looked at his friend in question.

“I-“ Felicity said still out of breath, looking back at Oliver. She stopped, though, not knowing what to say, and with a shake of her head she started running again.

“What’s wrong with computer engineer Barbie?” she heard Tommy ask behind her.

“I told you if you want to get back together with Laurel, you shouldn’t call her sister that.”

“Who says I want to get back together with Laurel?”

Felicity tore open the exit door and ran outside. She only made it a few more steps, though, before she had to stop. She bent her knees slightly, propped up her hands onto her knees and lowered her head. Her legs hurt, and her heart was still racing. She tried to take in a few deep breaths to calm down her erratic breathing, but instead a sob escaped her lips, making it even harder to breathe.

She knew she needed to get away from here. She didn’t want to be here any second longer. She couldn’t even talk to Oliver right now. She wanted to go home, hide beneath her blanket and forgot what had just happened. She couldn’t deal with it. Not right now and certainly not right here. She had wanted to keep the pregnancy out of school and now this.

“Felicity?”

Gasping for air, Felicity straightened back up and turned around. Instinctively she took a step back, but she stopped when she saw who was approaching her.

“Laurel,” she said in the mix of a sigh and a sob. “What are you-?”

“I was in the art room, working on a project when…” Laurel bit down on her bottom lip, waving with her phone. “Helena found the ultrasound picture?”

So the news really was spreading already, Felicity thought. Another sob escaped her lips and before the first tear had escaped her eyes, Laurel was already there. She wrapped her arms around Felicity and hugged her tightly, spending her the comfort Felicity felt she needed now more than ever.

“Everyone will know, Laurel,” Felicity sobbed against her sister’s shoulder, hiding her face against her neck.

Laurel stroked over Felicity’s hair gently, whispering back, “They would have found out sooner or later anyway. At least now it’s out, and you don’t have to keep it a secret any longer.”

“But I wanted them to find out after finals, not now,” Felicity replied between sobs. “I wanted them to find out on my terms, not like this. I don’t want people to know already, especially not at school.”

“I know,” Laurel whispered. She pulled back a little, wiping a strand of hair that was stuck to Felicity’s wet cheeks from her face and tugging it behind her ear. “But, Felicity, you decided to have this baby. You should stand up for this decision, you know? Who cares what the others think?”

“It’s not about that,” Felicity explained, wiping the tears from her cheeks. “I just don’t want… I don’t know… I don’t want to be the… Frack!”

“Maybe it’s a good thing. Keeping a secret like this is not easy, and I guess it is not healthy,” Laurel replied. “Maybe if you told people about you and Oliver-“

“Oh god, no!” Felicity interrupted Laurel hastily, shaking her head. “The only thing worse than people knowing I’m pregnant is people knowing I’m pregnant with his baby. I just don’t want this!”

“Felicity-“

“You said it yourself,” Felicity interrupted whatever objection her sister wanted to vocalize. “When you have a boyfriend like Tommy Merlyn or Oliver Queen, you automatically become the focus of school gossip, and the pregnancy is only going to make that worse. When people know about this, they will never stop talking about that, and-”

“I know,” Laurel assured her, pulling Felicity back into her arms and hugging her tightly. “I know.”

Felicity rested her head on Laurel’s shoulder and cried some more.

She knew everything would be harder now. Everyone would talk about her. They would watch her and judge her and say the most terrible things about her. Felicity didn’t care about that, or maybe she did… She wasn’t sure. Everything was a terrible blur in her head, causing a painful headache. She just knew that she cared about studying for finals and-

Felicity took in a deep breath. She couldn’t think about it any longer for now, or her head was going to explode.

“Can you take me home?” Felicity asked.

“Sure,” Laurel answered, rubbing her sister’s back comfortingly. “Come on, I parked the car not far from here.”

Silently the sisters walked towards the parking lot. Felicity didn’t miss the worried side glances Laurel shot her, but she didn’t say anything. Felicity felt the need to go to bed even more than she had before. The running and crying had made her even more tired. The headache was killing her and-

“Felicity?!”

Felicity stopped, turning around to see Oliver hurrying towards them. Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, hastily wiping a few more tears away from her cheeks. If she looked half as crappy as she felt, though, the wet paths on her cheeks were probably her smallest problem.

“Hey,” he whispered when he stopped several feet away from her, probably knowing exactly that she couldn’t have him too close as long as they were at school, especially now. “Sorry, I needed to get rid of Tommy first. I… received a message…”

“I guess everyone in school did already,” Laurel replied, rubbing Felicity’s back comfortingly.

“Are you okay?” Oliver asked Felicity.

“I have a terrible headache, and I am more terrified of the future than ever,” Felicity replied. She didn’t miss how her voice sounded harsh, and sighed, shrugging her shoulders. “It happened, and there is no going back to when it was only us knowing as much as I want that, so I guess I just gotta live with it.”

An uncomfortable silence settled. Felicity knew it wasn’t Oliver’s fault. He hadn’t been going around messaging people about the pregnancy. Neither had he been the one who had carried the ultrasound picture with him in one of his books and let it fall right at Helena’s feet. None of this was his fault.

When the silence lasted even longer, Laurel cleared her throat and said, “I was just about to take her home and-“

“I’ll do that,” Oliver offered, looking from Laurel to Felicity. “I’ll take you home.”

“Laurel was on her way home anyway, so-“

“Maybe we could make a little detour and… I don’t know… just spend some time together. We didn’t see each other all day, and with what happened I guess we have a few things to talk about,” Oliver said.

He took a quick look around, making sure there was nobody but them. Then he quickly stepped forward, framed her face with his hands and kissed her gently. He pulled her bottom lip between his own, sucking shortly before he let go. As soon as the kiss had begun, it was ended. Oliver stepped back, keeping the safe distance that wouldn’t let anyone seeing them assume there was anything going on between them.

“Please,” he whispered.

“I’m… tired,” Felicity explained slowly.

It was the truth. She was tired. She had wanted to go to bed even before the encounter with Helena. Now she was just even more tired, and she really just wanted to lock herself in her room and sleep.

Oliver nodded and disappointingly he pushed his hands into the pockets of his jeans, lowering his gaze. “Yeah, I understand.”

“We’ll see each other on Sunday, okay?” she offered.

Oliver nodded, looking everything but happy about the thought to only see her again on Sunday. He smiled bravely, though.

“Good night then.”

“Night, Oliver,” Felicity replied.

She turned around and took a few steps. It wasn’t long before she stopped again, though. Lowering her head with a sigh, she closed her eyes and could actually see Oliver’s disappointed face right in front of her. She was tired, but she shouldn’t shut him out more than she was already doing by keeping their relationship a secret. It wasn’t fair to him.

“Hey, everything alright?” Laurel asked.

“Yes,” Felicity replied, looking back up. “I just… Is it okay if I spend a little more time with Oliver and let him take me home later?”

“You don’t have to if you’re tired,” Oliver said hastily, but Felicity could see the hope in his face when she glanced at him shortly.

“Would that be okay?” she asked Laurel once more.

“Sure,” Laurel replied. “I’m gonna tell our parents that you need a little more time in the library.”

“Yes, thanks.”

When Laurel left, Felicity turned back around to Oliver and sighed once again, slowly walking back to Oliver.

“Are you sure you don’t want to go to bed and sleep?” he asked.

“Well, I might want to sleep, but I can sleep everywhere, so how about we drive somewhere where it’s only us and… spend a little time with each other? You can hold me while I am sleeping in your arms.”

“I would like that,” Oliver replied, nodding towards his car. “I’ve parked there.”

They started walking to his car together, neither of them saying a word. Oliver held the door to the passenger seat open for her, not missing how Felicity took a quick look around.

“If someone sees us, I will just say I drove a pregnant girl home. It’s like helping an old woman across the street. Girls will be going even crazier about me,” Oliver said with a grin. Felicity perked her eyebrow at him, so he quickly added, “Not that I would care.”

“You better not,” Felicity replied, getting into the car.

She looked at him strictly, making him chuckle. It felt like the first time in a long time that it felt like it had been feeling before the pregnancy. They were just teasing each other like a normal teenage couple. She had almost forgotten how that felt, she realized with a sigh.

“Like I would ever have eyes for any other girl,” he said and closed the door.

 

 

Oliver was more than relieved that Felicity had decided to spend a little more time with him. During the whole day his silver lining had been seeing Felicity, even if it was only from afar in the library. Watching her study could be quite attractive, especially when she was chewing on one of her red pens and mumbling to herself.

This was even better than watching her from afar, though. Way better actually. They were sitting on the hood of his car with Felicity between his legs. He had his arms wrapped around her tightly, keeping her close to him. Her back was resting against his chest, her head against his shoulder, giving him the perfect opportunity to kiss her temple and cheek and the corner of her lips whenever he felt like it.

When they had arrived at the bay and made themselves comfortable on the hood of the car, Felicity had told him what exactly had happened in the library. She had cried a little more in his arms and told him about her worries for the future, and Oliver had listened and just held her, knowing that she needed to get it off her mind.

Sometimes Felicity tended to keep everything to herself and let it eat her up. She had trouble trusting people since her father had left, making her always do things on her own. Oliver knew he had messed up the trust she had had in him when he had walked out on her, and building it back up would require some time. He just hoped one day she would trust him again.

“You know, we could still tell people that I’m the baby’s father,” Oliver whispered into her ear right before pressing his lips to the soft spot right under it. “You wouldn’t have to go through this alone.”

“Oliver,” Felicity said with a sigh, bending her head back, so she could look at him. “You know why that wouldn’t be a good idea.”

“Okay, it might make everything worse at first,” Oliver replied honestly, “but think about how much better it will be then. Now that people know about the pregnancy, let them know about us, and the whole thing is done. Otherwise you will have to go through this first, and then in a few months the rumors about us will spread, and everything will start from the beginning again. Why not get it over with everything else now already?”

Felicity looked at him hesitatingly. Obviously there had to be something about her reasoning to keep this a secret that he didn’t get. Because shouldn’t telling people about them right now take all their troubles away and open their way for a brighter future where they didn’t have to hide all the time or be paranoid about getting caught?

“If it’s about the gossip, I promise you that I will keep that away from you,” Oliver explained. “I’ll be your personal bodyguard, making sure nobody will hurt you or the baby.”

A quiet smile formed on Felicity’s lip and it raised hope in him that maybe finally she’d be ready. He knew he had promised her to be patient and he was, but it just sucked not being able to be there for her the way that she wanted. If they didn’t hide, he would have just wrapped his arms around her in school and kissed her, making everyone know that he wasn’t ashamed about their decision to have this baby.

As soon as the hope had built inside of him, as quickly it was shattered, though, when Felicity shook her head. He tried not to look too hurt, but given what he saw in Felicity’s face he assumed that the hurt was still visible on his face.

“Oliver…”

Felicity sat up, so she could turn on his arms and lean the side of her body up against his chest. Oliver kept his right arm wrapped around her back and put the other arm beneath her knees, pulling her close. Felicity lifted her hand, stroking it over her cheek and straightened up enough to press her lips towards his. It was a gentle kiss, more like a brush of her lips against his without any pressure. Only slowly did Felicity open her lips, and with a sigh he opened up his to allow her tongue to slip into his mouth.

There hadn’t been much time for intimacy lately. Whenever they met, their worries about the future overshadowed everything else. They always talked a lot, and Oliver held her tightly as often as he could. Sometimes they even kissed, but usually it was rather short kisses. Oliver didn’t complain. He knew there was a lot going on with Felicity, physically and emotionally. There was a lot going on with him, too. They were teenagers who would become parents and hence had to grow up now, so they couldn’t give into what their hormones wanted them to do. Kissing and making out had to be deferred to when all troubles were cleared. Oliver got that, and still kissing Felicity like this felt like it was giving him life.

When their lips parted, Felicity rested her forehead against his. Her lips brushed against his shortly once more before she nuzzled his nose with hers. Oliver could feel her breath ghosting over her skin and breathed in deeply to smell the sweet scent of her skin. Felicity’s hand came to rest on his cheek once more, and Oliver leaned into her touch with a sigh. Slowly Felicity pulled away far enough to look at him, and Oliver opened his eyes, keeping his face where it rested in her hand.

“You know how much I love you, right?” Felicity asked.

Sighing, Oliver nodded. “Of course I do.”

“Really?”

“Really,” Oliver promised. “I wouldn’t mind hearing it again, though.”

“I love you very much,” Felicity assured him with a smile. “I love you so much that I can actually see us raising a baby together. That’s a lot, isn’t it?”

Oliver chuckled. “It’s a lot, yes.”

“I want us to do this together, but… not in school.”

Oliver took in a deep breath before breathing out with a sigh.

“It doesn’t mean that I don’t love you, though,” Felicity assured him once again. “I do love you. I just don’t particularly like the life that comes with being with you. Officially being with you.”

Oliver sighed once more. “I know.”

“So it’s okay not to tell people for a little while longer?”

Slowly Oliver nodded. What choice did he have anyway?

“Sure.”

“And you’re not mad?”

“I am not mad,” he assured her honestly, pulling her a little closer against his chest. “I love you, and I am going to be patient. Just… Whenever you feel ready, just tell me, and we tell people, okay?”

“Okay,” Felicity nodded and kissed him once more, more slowly this time.

When their lips parted, Oliver tugged a strand of her hair behind her ear. “And now?”

“Now we need to get through the next weeks of school,” Felicity replied, leaning her head against his shoulder. “I’m scared of what will happen when I go back there.”

“Just ignore it,” Oliver suggested. “Nobody knows you or the whole story. Let them judge and ignore it. They’ll get tired of it soon.”

“I wish it was that easy,” Felicity replied with a sigh. She made a short pause before she added, “Sara told me the same thing. She said when she came out about Nyssa and her, people talked, but eventually they stopped.”

“You’re gonna get through this,” Oliver promised, kissing the tip of her nose. “We’re gonna get through this. You have me, so whatever happens, when you need someone, you just come to me.”

“You always make that sound so easy,” Felicity said with a sigh. “Like all I have to do is call you, and you’d drop everything to come to me and be my knight in shining armor.”

“That’s exactly what it is,” Oliver assured, smiling about the picture that popped into his head at her words.

“Ever thought about that maybe I’d like to be my own knight in shining armor?”

Oliver chuckled, looking at Felicity. “I know you definitely can save yourself, not that you really need any saving in the first place. The thing is just that… you are not alone in this. We’re a family, and you can lean on me and trust me. So when you need someone, you can always come to me. Always.”

“Wouldn’t you get tired of it? I mean… always come running when I call you?”

“Never,” Oliver assured. When Felicity only looked away, Oliver tightened his hold on her and waited until she looked back at her before he said, “Felicity, we’re having baby. We’re a family now. You, me and our baby. I’m not like your father. I won’t leave our family. We’re in this together.”

Felicity looked at him for a long time, not saying a word. When tears sprang into her eyes, she took in a deep breath. Then she whispered, “With everyone knowing now… I’m- I’m scared. I was scared before, but now I am scared again and even worse. I think.”

Oliver nodded, and slowly he slid his arm away from under her knees to put his hand on the bump instead. He had never done that before. He had actually been a little scared about it like he could hurt the baby by doing so. Now it felt right, though, and to his surprise it actually felt good. He didn’t feel any movement, but he knew it was too soon for that. Felicity had once felt it and texted him. He had been so jealous.

He waited until Felicity looked at him before he whispered, “We’ll be fine.”

When a tear escaped the corner of her eye, Oliver leaned down and rested his forehead against hers, wordlessly reassuring her that she really meant what he had said.

They were going to be fine.


	6. Chapter 6

“I didn’t even know that she had a boyfriend.”

“I don’t think she does.”

“Neither do I. Actually I heard that her mother was a Vegas showgirl. Maybe she takes after her and tried to earn some money.”

“Like what? Like she is a prostitute?”

“Maybe it was a private dance gone wrong.”

“I just think it’s crazy that she wants to keep it.”

“Definitely crazy. Do you think her parents forced her to keep it?”

“No. My dad knows Quentin, and he said he can’t imagine him doing something like that. He actually thinks her parents were just as shocked as everyone else.”

“Well, what did you expect from a mother who looks like hers?”

“True. Still crazy that she of all people is the one ending up pregnant, though. She’s the last I expected it from.”

“I guess Tommy Merlyn can be glad he got away before this drama.”

Felicity slid down on her chair, trying to disappear even more than the book she was holding in front of her face could help her to do. Closing her eyes, she took in a deep breath to keep herself from crying. She wished she could just shut out the voices of her classmates, but it just wasn’t that easy.

The last two weeks had been hard. Just like she had feared it would happen, the news about her pregnancy had spread like wildfire. When she had come to school the morning after her encounter with Helena, all eyes had been on her, and immediately people had started whispering quietly. Felicity had tried to ignore it, but it was hard to ignore with all the bullshit that was said about her. She wasn’t even sure if her being a call girl was the craziest thing she had heard being said about her. There were just so many rumors going around.

People in school seemed to have no respect. They didn’t respect her decision, her privacy or even her as a human-being. They talked about her. They made up things about her. They made fun of her, mimicking the way she walked that had changed now that the bump had grown even more. They made faces at her. They laughed about her. They seemed to be doing everything they could think of to make school a place where she really didn’t feel comfortable anymore.

Felicity had always loved school, and now the thought of getting up in the morning and spending hours of hell here made her stomach cramp painfully. School really wasn’t an easy place to be at for her right now.

If the gazes Oliver shot her several times each day were any indication, it wasn’t much easier for him either. Even without anyone knowing that he was the father the situation was quite encumbering for him. Felicity knew that he hated to not be able to officially stand by her side and for her to be alone in this, now even more than he did before. She just wasn’t ready for that secret to come out. It was bad enough as it was right now.

At least Felicity had Oliver’s support even if only secretly, and she had her sisters and Nyssa. The three of them were very supportive and even protective of her. They tried to make sure she spent only little time alone in school, so they could help her ignoring the mocking voices of her classmates. Having family and friends like that really was the best. And only if the progress was a slow one, Felicity felt like her mother was getting closer to accepting her decision of keeping the baby.

Shortly she stroked her hand over the bump, feeling the baby kick its feet against her fingers in response. Felicity smiled quietly. She just enjoyed feeling the baby move and respond to her caress so much. When she noticed the judging gazes of her classmates, though, she hastily moved her hand away, trying to disappear behind her book once more.

Sara had told her over and over again that people just needed time although she had also offered to shorten the time they needed by just punching them in their stupid, ugly faces. All Felicity had to do was say the word. Of course Felicity had shaken her head and laughed it off, but actually she found the thought to let Sara go around and use the people who were mocking her as her punching bag quite appealing.

Of course she would never ask Sara to do something like that, though. She would just take Sara at her word and hope it was going to get better soon.

When the teacher stepped into the classroom, Felicity gathered her courage to put the book away and straighten up on her chair. She felt like almost all eyes were on her even if it was only in side glances. Felicity did her best to ignore them just like she did her best to ignore the painful cramps in her stomach.

At least this was the last class for today. After getting through this she could go home, lie down on her bed and take a nap. Then she could maybe take a bath or just spend the rest of the day being lazy on the couch.

“Ms. Smoak?”

Felicity straightened up hastily, trying to figure out what she had missed since her thoughts had drifted off. The way Ms. Rodriguez smiled at her didn’t give away anything, though.

“Yes?” Felicity just said insecurely, clearing her throat.

“Mr. Harris would like to see you in his office now,” she explained. “You are excused for our class today.”

Felicity hesitated for a short moment, wondering what the principal could possibly want from her. Then she packed her school things into her bag hastily. On her way to the door she held her bag in front of her bump, trying to hide it behind it. She didn’t want even more talking about her as there was already.

As soon as the door was closed behind her, Felicity took in a deep breath. She felt the most comfortable right now when she was all alone, and since everyone was in class, she was the only one walking through the long hallways. Luckily, there were only a few more weeks of school ahead of her. After that everything would be easy or at least easier.

Felicity knocked at the door to the secretary’s office, and was greeted with a polite smile.

“Ms. Smoak,” the secretary said. “Mr. Harris is already waiting for you. You can go in.”

“Thank you,” Felicity whispered, quickly walking to the door of the principal’s office.

She took in a deep breath, still wondering why Mr. Harris had asked her here in the first place, and knocked quietly. Immediately she was asked to come in. Putting on a brave smile, she opened the door and stepped into the office.

“Ms. Smoak. I am glad you could come here so soon,” Mr. Harris said with a smile.

“Ms. Rodriguez said you wanted to talk to me?” Felicity just answered, unsure of what else to say. She glanced at the woman who sat next to Mr. Harris at the small conference table before looking back at Mr. Harris. “If you are in a meeting, I could-“

“Oh, no,” Mr. Harris said hastily, gesturing to the third chair at the table. “We were waiting for you. Please sit down and make yourself comfortable. Can I offer you something to drink? Water or tea maybe?”

“No, thank you, sir,” Felicity said. Hesitatingly she put her bag next to the free chair and sat down. The woman Felicity didn’t know and Mr. Harris just looked at her. Neither of them said a word, and Felicity felt her nervousness increasing. “Uhm… Is there a reason you asked me to come here because I am missing my class and-“

“How are you feeling, Ms. Smoak?” Mr. Harris interrupted her.

He had his hands folded on the tabletop and was leaning forward a little. He was still smiling at her, but even though Felicity felt like it was supposed to calm her down, his smile only made her feel worse.

“I’m… fine,” Felicity said slowly. She felt a lump in her throat, so she gulped before she tried to smile again. “Everything’s fine.”

“And, see, that is what I am not so sure of,” he replied.

Felicity’s breath got caught in her throat. She knew that the teachers hadn’t missed the news of her pregnancy. Everyone here knew about it. So far none of the teachers had really talked to her about it, though. She had found a note from the school’s guidance counselor, offering to talk if she wanted to, and her PE teacher had asked her to get him an official confirmation from the doctor, so she wouldn’t even have to come to the PE lessons anymore. Other than that the teachers had ignored the situation. Until now as it seemed.

“Your situation is quite… sensitive,” he explained calmly. “Of course you are not the first young student to become pregnant here, but let’s just say you were the one we least expected it from. Ms. Smoak, you have a really promising future ahead of you. You are one of the best students I’ve ever gotten to know, and I want to make sure that you’ve considered your options carefully because it would be a shame if in five years from now you’ll regret the decision you made today.”

Felicity’s stomach cramped. Why did everyone think they had to make sure she was considering her options like she had just woken up and decided to have and raise this baby? She had considered her options, and she had made a decision. Why was that so hard to accept?

“This is Ms. Anderson. She’s a good friend and fortunately she has been working in an advice center for teenage mothers for several years,” Mr. Harris continued. “I think together we should find out what it is that you really want and need.”

_We_ should find out, Felicity repeated the principal’s words in her mind. She barely believed that she had really heard him say this. This wasn’t a decision he was supposed to make with her. This was her decision, and she had decided already. Felicity knew that Mr. Harris had some personal interest in her graduation. He hoped to be promoted soon, and a student with a promising future like he had called it would definitely make him look even better, so of course he had asked ‘a good friend’ to advise her.

Still this was just too much. He couldn’t make her change her decision only so he would get a better job!

“Ms. Smoak, we are not going to tell you what to do,” Ms. Anderson explained. “We really just want to make sure that you know what you really want. There are a lot of options to consider. Maybe an open adoption is something you’d like to know more about because I know from my professional experience that a lot young mothers-to-be forget about that possibility because they think it has to be all or nothing. The truth is, though, that you can still be included in the baby’s life, and-“

“Ms. Smoak, you have to see that a baby will limit your chances. And let’s see this from the other perspective. Maybe the child will feel your regret about what you gave up and feel like it took something from you. You don’t want your child to grow up like that. I am sure you only want the best for it.”

Mr. Harris nodded towards Ms. Anderson, and she opened out some flyers on the table right in front of Felicity. She looked at them without really seeing them, concentrating on her breathing.

“With an open adoption you’d have the chance to still continue the path you have planned for your life and at the same time be included in the child’s life. You would get to choose the parents for the baby. You could receive photos and even visitation rights if you want to, maybe every other months would be a good interval. We really have a positive response to this solution. A lot of young mothers are overwhelmed by the challenges raising a baby brings. This way they can be included as much as they feel able to without feeling overwhelmed. This helps the mothers and the babies. And there are so many nice people who would like to raise a child and can’t have one on their own. This might be an option that you should seriously consider. Like I said before, it really doesn’t have to be an all or nothing. You can find a balance between going on with your life and raising a child.”

“Ms. Smoak, you have to see the advantages this solution has. It will be so much easier for you to concentrate on college and a career in I.T. if you aren’t solely responsible for raising a child. Being a single mother at your age will be very hard and- Where are you going?”

Felicity couldn’t take it any longer. She couldn’t continue to sit here and listen to Mr. Harris and Ms. Anderson trying to talk her into what they tried to make her belief was the best solution for her situation. She couldn’t listen to them tell her how much easier everything would be for her if she just did what they suggested.

She couldn’t think in here. She couldn’t breathe in here. She couldn’t do anything in here. Besides, her stomach cramps had grown to be so bad that she feared she would have to vomit. And though she kind of felt like Mr. Harris would deserve it if she vomited right here in his office, he would only feel vindicated.

“Ms. Smoak, we should really-“ she heard Ms. Anderson calling after her.

Felicity didn’t stop or turn back, though. She ran out of Mr. Harris’ office and through the secretary’s office into the hallways and headed right to the exit.

Nobody seemed to believe that she could do this. Nobody seemed to even consider that she could do this. Instead they just stuck with their opinions and tried to make her feel like she couldn’t do this, so she would instead follow their advices, and she didn’t want to do that any longer. Making a decision had been hard enough. She couldn’t let herself be talked into something else now. She had made her decision because she knew what she wanted. She wanted to have and try raising this baby.

And now she just needed to get the hell out of here.

 

 

Oliver held onto the steering wheel so tightly, his fingers actually hurt from the force. He had to force himself to take deep and even breaths, but he seemed to have trouble forcing the air into his lungs. His chest felt too heavy.

If her parents were home when he arrived there, Felicity would probably kill him. He was worried about her, though, and he needed to talk to her and see her. And since she hadn’t taken his phone calls or texted him back in the last twenty-four hours, he had no choice but to drive home to her and visit her there. He just hoped that both her parents were at work. He didn’t want to cause Felicity more stress than she was put through already.

Felicity had told him about what had happened in the principal’s office two weeks ago. She had called and told him about it, and she had sounded terribly rattled about what had happened. He had wanted to see her, but Felicity had said she was too tired. The entire week she had found reasons not see him, and now she had been sick for another week, so he hadn’t even seen her in school.

So of course Oliver was worried. He wanted Felicity to be okay, and he wanted their baby to be okay. He needed to know that they were okay. He and Felicity weren’t married, and yet the baby _and_ Felicity were his family, so of course he needed to know that she was okay.

Given that he wasn’t allowed to stand up for her in school, the least he could do was check on her and try to make her feel better in any way she would let him. Even if it was only rubbing her back or her feet or holding her while she was falling asleep – he would do whatever she asked him to do as long as he got the chance to make her feel even the tiniest bit better about what had happened and what was actually still happening.

During the last couple of days that she had been home sick, the rumors had only become worse. He had lost count of how many guys she had allegedly slept with, and how many of them had been forced to give a DNA sample, so the doctor could find out who of them was the father. He hated what past they said she and her family had. He hated all of it.

Yesterday he had overheard one of the players on his team talking about Felicity in the changing room, and it had cost everything in him not to go and punch him in the face. God, how much he would have liked punching that guy until he wouldn’t have been able to say anything more. Luckily, the guy had made a dumb comment about Tommy being lucky to have gotten out of that family just in time right after. Tommy had done the job of punching that guy for him. Oliver would have liked to clap his friend’s shoulder in thanks, but he knew it would have seemed off. So instead he had just halfheartedly told Tommy that he couldn’t attack one of their players, shrugged his shoulders and gone out on the field for training.

This wasn’t about him and how he felt, though. This was only about Felicity and how she felt because she was the one to bear the brunt even if it was in some way her own decision given that she refused to include him. Oliver shook his head. Felicity hadn’t chosen this. Neither of them really had. They had made a decision, but they hadn’t chosen for her to be attacked like this.

When Oliver directed the car onto Felicity’s street, he immediately held out for her parents’ cars. Luckily, as carefully as he tried to find them, they didn’t seem to be there, so he parked his car in the small drive way in front of the Lances’ and Smoaks’ house and hastily walked to the front door. He knocked quietly, waiting for it to open, but the door stayed closed. He knocked once more, but again she didn’t open.

She was probably sleeping, Oliver assumed. He took a quick look around to make sure he wasn’t watched by any nosy neighbors. Then he slowly went around the house, checking if the patio door was open, but today just didn’t seemed to be his lucky day because the door was just as locked as the front door was.

Sighing, he put his hands to his hips and leaned his head back, looking at Felicity’s window. What was he supposed to do now? Throwing little stones at her window didn’t seem like the best choice. If her window was open, he’d try to climb the tree and get in that way. Oliver pursed his lips, letting his gaze move along the house.

Felicity’s window was closed, but the window of the bathroom on the second floor wasn’t. Oliver cocked his head, taking another quick look around before he started climbing the tree right next to the window. When he was close enough, he stopped shortly, making sure he couldn’t hear any noises from inside the house. He didn’t hear anything, so he hastily put a foot to the windowsill and climbed into the small bathroom.

He was out of breath and his muscles hurt. Climbing a tree to get into a house through a window was not necessarily part of the football training, but that was just one of the many things he would do to make sure the woman he loved was okay.

He tiptoed to the door and opened it only far enough, so he could sneak a peek into the hallway. It seemed empty, so slowly Oliver opened the door a little more and stuck his head into the hallway, looking to both sides. Apparently neither Captain Lance nor Felicity’s mom was here, he thought in relief.

Taking in a deep breath, Oliver left the bathroom and tiptoed to Felicity’s room. He knocked quietly, but she didn’t answer. Still he opened the door carefully. Felicity was lying curled under the blanket on her bed. She was facing the wall, her back turned towards him. Her blonde hair was sprawled over the pillow, her right arm wrapped around herself. If it wasn’t for her uneven breathing and the quiet sobs that came from her, he would think she was asleep.

“If you decided to spend your free periods to come here and try to convince me to come to school, I need to disappoint you, Sara; you’re wasting your time.”

Oliver closed the door behind him, nodding quietly, before he said, “Hey.”

Immediately Felicity turned around, and Oliver’s breath got caught in his throat for a short moment at the sight he was met with. Her eyes were red from crying, some tears still streaming down her cheeks. She quickly tried to wipe them away, but Oliver was faster. He crossed the room with large steps, sat down on the edge of the mattress and put his gentle hands to her soft cheeks. He wiped the tears away with his thumbs, and with a low sigh Felicity relaxed her face into his hands.

“Hey,” he whispered once more.

Slowly he leaned forward, gently brushing his lips against Felicity’s. She put her fingers around his wrists, keeping his hands in place. Her lips opened up to his, her tongue slipping into his mouth and massaging hers. The kiss was slow and reassuring. Oliver sighed into her mouth, feeling most of the tension and worry of the last hours easing away. When their lips parted, he leaned back immediately, looking at her once more, but Felicity kept her eyes closed.

Gently he rubbed his thumbs over her skin, asking, “Don’t you want to tell me what’s wrong?”

Felicity huffed a sarcastic laugh. “Do I really need to tell you?”

“No,” Oliver whispered back. He leaned his forehead against hers and nuzzled her nose with his. “I know it’s not easy.”

Felicity took in a sniffling breath, leaning back a little. Slowly she opened her eyes and let their linked fingers lower into her lap. Oliver watched her closely. He felt the need to comfort her and tell her that everything would be alright, but he knew that she needed time and she needed some of the stress to get off her chest first.

“I don’t want to go back to school anymore,” she said, avoiding his gaze. “I can’t take all the rumors anymore. I can’t take having everyone stare at me and talk about me and judge me. I just don’t want that anymore.”

Oliver nodded slowly, waiting for whether or not she wanted to say something more, but Felicity stayed quiet. Part of him wanted to offer her once more to tell people he was the father, but he knew this wasn’t helping her, or at least she wouldn’t see that. Gently he squeezed her fingers, making her look at him.

“You’re strong. You’re the strongest person I know. The current situation is hard, and I understand that you feel like it is too much for you to take, but if anyone can do it, it’s you.”

Felicity took in a sniffling breath. “Maybe I could have done that before but not anymore.”

“Why?” Oliver asked. “What changed? You’re still the same woman who moved across the country in the middle of the school year to make it easier for her mother to have a relationship. You’re-“

“-pregnant,” Felicity interrupted him.

 “The fact that you’re pregnant doesn’t change that you’re strong. Maybe you’re a little crazy because of the hormones- Ow!” Oliver made when Felicity slapped his chest. It ended in a chuckle, though, since it didn’t really hurt him, and actually the way she was looking at him with a grumpy face didn’t help him to stop himself from laughing either. “See? That’s what the hormones make of you.”

“Oh, shut up,” Felicity replied with a chuckle, but it only lasted shortly before she got serious again. She took in another deep breath, looking at him. Quietly she whispered, “Oliver, I am pregnant.”

Oliver just nodded, waiting for her to say something more and explain to him what she meant because he really didn’t get it. Felicity lowered her gaze to their linked fingers, though, not saying anything for awhile. Her pinky finger played with his thumb. It took a few minutes before Felicity looked at him again.

“I am pregnant,” she repeated, looking into his eyes, “and that means that the stress is not only affecting me. I might be able to take all of it, but the baby might not.”

She put their linked fingers to the bump, moving their hands up and down the curve. Oliver tried to concentrate on feeling their baby move beneath the palm of his hands, but he or she stayed unmoving. With a quiet smile he thought that he or she was probably asleep.

“All the stress isn’t good for the baby,” Felicity added in a whisper. “She needs some rest.”

There were a thousand different things running through his mind. There were a thousand different things he felt he should say in response to what she had just said.

“She?” he asked.

He knew it was only a little thing – one little word, actually only one syllable. They often said ‘he or she’ because it just sounded so much better than ‘it’ when referring to their baby. Of course it didn’t have to mean anything that she had decided to refer to their baby as ‘she’ and not ‘he or she’, but if the certainty she had said it with had been any indication, Felicity knew something he didn’t know yet.

She took in a breath, breathing out with a quiet chuckle. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to tell you like this.”

“It’s a girl?”

“Yes, it’s a girl,” Felicity replied, smiling at him. “I had another doctor appointment, and I actually didn’t want her to tell me, but she did before I could tell her not to. And I am sorry for not telling you about the appointment, but my mom offered to go there with me, and I didn’t want you to be disappointed and-“

“Hey,” Oliver interrupted her worried babble hastily, squeezing her hands. “I love you, and I am the last person you ever have to worry about not to please, okay?”

“Okay,” Felicity said with a smile of relief.

Oliver leaned forward, brushing his lips against hers shortly before he lowered his head to the bump, kissing it through the fabric of Felicity’s thin shirt. He moved his hands under the shirt, feeling the naked skin beneath his fingertips. Felicity’s fingers stroked through his short hair, cradling his head to the bump while he snuggled his ear against it.

“Woah! She kicks against my hands strongly,” he said when he felt their baby – their daughter! – moving.

“She’s very active. I blame that on you.”

“You can blame on me whatever you want,” Oliver said with a chuckle.

They were having a baby girl. It was amazing. Until now it had only been a baby, but knowing that it was going to be a baby girl, helped him to imagine their future. He could actually see the little girl with her blonde, curly hair and her glasses standing in front of him and demanding some chocolate chip mint ice cream. The thought made him smile like a Cheshire Cat.

Of course he was a little disappointed that he hadn’t gotten the chance to accompany her to the appointment. He wanted to be there on every step of the way, but he also got why she hadn’t stopped her mother from coming with her. If Donna was finally able to accept Felicity’s decision and even accompany her to the doctor, he wanted Felicity to enjoy this little success. There were enough problems to pull her down as it was.

“Hi, babygirl,” he whispered to their daughter in the bump. “It’s daddy. I just want you to know that I know that mommy has to go through a lot right now, and I am sure that you can feel this too. You don’t have to worry, though, because daddy’s making sure that nobody hurts mommy or you, okay? I love you two very much, and I would never let anything happen to either of you.”

Oliver smiled when their daughter kicked against his hands once more like she wanted to make sure that he knew she had heard him and trusted him. He was just sure that this was exactly what she wanted to signal him with it.

“You know, it would actually be easier if mommy let me punch whoever tried to hurt her or you, but- Ow!” he made like he had done before when she hit the back of his head now. He rested his chin on the bump, looking at Felicity with a teasing smile. “You really want to teach our daughter violence so soon?”

“Didn’t you just tell her about punching people?”

“Yes, to protect the two of you.”

Felicity chuckled. “You’re impossible.”

Oliver kissed the bump once more before he put his chin back to it and looked at Felicity again. She stroked her hand over his cheek before she let it rest there while she was looking at him. Oliver snuggled his face more into the palm of her hand, making Felicity smile softly.

“How come that I always feel so much more sure about everything when you’re here with me?” she asked. “Like all I need you to do is be here and immediately I feel better and remember all the reasons why I knew having this baby was the right decision?”

Smiling, Oliver moved the palms of his hands over the bump a little. His fingertips followed their daughter’s movements slowly.

“It’s my superpower.”

“Yeah… It has to be.”

Oliver smiled at her for a long moment before he pressed another kiss to the bump.

“I know you’re not ready to include me the way I would like to be included, and I am not going to urge you to do something you are not ready for,” he hastily added when Felicity was about to say something. He waited until she nodded before he continued, “I know you think it will be too exhausting, and it’s okay if you need more time because the most important thing to me is that you and our daughter are okay. So I suggest that maybe we should just meet more often. Given that obviously I can climb the tree to the bathroom, I am sure I can climb the one to your bedroom, too. And we just make sure that we run into each other regularly between our classes. We see each other more often, and it will hopefully make you feel better.”

Felicity looked at him. “You’re sure we will manage to do that?”

“Of course I am,” Oliver reassured her with a smile. “You, me and our little baby girl will manage to do this. We just need to try. Okay?”

“Okay,” she said after a short while, nodding her head with a smile. She moved her hand through his short hair once more shortly, scratching his scalp like she knew he loved. It made him hum contently. “I love you, you know that?”

“I do,” Oliver replied, “and I love you, too.”

Oliver and Felicity smiled at each other for a long time, and neither of them said a word.

“Oliver?”

“Hm?”

“What are we going to do now?”

Oliver frowned. “I thought we just-“

“No, no,” Felicity interrupted him hastily, shaking her head. “What do we do right now like with the rest of the day?”

“When are your parents coming home?”

“Late… I think.”

Smiling, Oliver propped himself up onto his hands and crawled up the bed until he lay right next to Felicity. He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close until her head rested on his shoulder and her bump pressed against his abs.

“In that case I suggest we use the time for some cuddling.”

Immediately Felicity snuggled closer to him, turning onto her side, so her body could melt against his side. She moved her head closer until her forehead rested against his neck. When Oliver’s fingers started gently massaging her lower back, she closed her eyes with a sigh.

“I like this,” she whispered with another sigh. “I think I might fall asleep.”

“Fall asleep. You two need the rest.”

“Are you going to stay here?”

“Until your parents come home,” Oliver promised.

He turned his head to press a gentle kiss to her forehead. He felt her breath evening out against his neck, telling him that she had fallen asleep. Oliver smiled quietly, thinking he would never get tired of holding his two girls in his arms. He rested one hand on the bump, feeling his daughter kick against it immediately.

“Psst, baby girl,” he whispered. “Mommy needs some sleep. You can dance in there later again, okay?”

Sighing sleepily, Felicity moved her hand over his on the bump, murmuring, “Listen to daddy, baby. He’s smarter than most people believe.”

Oliver smiled. Daddy. He really was going to be a daddy, the daddy for a little baby girl.


	7. Chapter 7

Felicity tried to concentrate on the article she was supposed to read for the essay she still had to write, but she found herself having trouble to focus on reading even a single word.

How was she supposed to concentrate when she could feel Oliver’s gaze on the back of her neck all the time? It made the hair at the back of her neck raise and a shiver run down the length of her spine. If Oliver continued to stare at her like she knew he was, someone would definitely sense that there was something going on between the two of them.

When she had agreed to meet here with Sara, Laurel and Nyssa to study together, she had texted Oliver about it, and she had been more than happy to find him here already when she had arrived an hour ago. Neither he nor Tommy, who was still sitting next to him, had seemed to be too pleased about being in the library. She had known that she could trust Oliver to be here, though, sitting at the table next to the one where Nyssa, Sara and Laurel had been waiting for her.

She was meeting with Oliver more often now, just like they had agreed on only a week ago. They were texting almost all the time, making sure they would have as much opportunities to run into each other in school as possible. And just like Oliver had anticipated, it really helped her to shut out all the gossip there was about her and made her feel better.

When they ran into each other in the hallways or wherever else they had the opportunity to, Oliver always smiled or winked at her, at least when he was sure nobody was watching them. It wasn’t much, but yet it made her feel better every time. Just seeing him made her feel better actually because seeing him reminded her of all the reassuring words he had said, and that just simply was enough for her.

And when school was over, they met, so Oliver could repeat his comforting words and help make her feel even better. He brought her food, rubbed her aching back and feet and did whatever else she needed to feel less stressed. Since Felicity had worried about whether the stress was too much for the baby, he also took care that the little human growing in side of her felt better. He stroked the bump, applying some aromatic lotion on it, and he talked to the baby.

The little girl was usually very active, kicking against Felicity’s inside all day and almost all night, but once Oliver was talking to her, she held completely still. He seemed to have the same comforting effect on her as he had on Felicity.

Oliver was incredible with them.

With a low sigh, Felicity tried to read the sentence she had been failing to read the last ten minutes now once more. She had almost made it through the whole text passage when-

“It’s weird seeing her,” she heard a whisper from one of the near tables. Felicity turned her head, finding three of her classmates whispering about her and shooting her glances. “How does she even dare to leave the house? Isn’t she ashamed?”

“Obviously she’s not.”

Felicity leaned back in her chair, lifting the book in front of her face to disappear behind it. It was what she usually did when she heard someone talking about her. Using her book as a wall to shield herself from the judging voices didn’t work too well, but unfortunately it seemed like the only thing she could do.

She felt the urge to turn her head and look back over her shoulder to Oliver. The girls were still looking at her, though, not even looking away when she looked back at them, and Felicity didn’t want them to realize there was something between Oliver and her. So she kept her eyes on her book, only glancing at the girls every now and then.

“I just can’t believe that they let her continue high school like nothing has happened,” “Like… aren’t they afraid that other girls could get pregnant now, too?”

“Yeah, because pregnancy is usually contagious, isn’t it?” Sara hissed at them.

A long moment of quiet followed before Felicity heard books being closed and chairs being pushed back, telling her that someone was leaving. Slowly Felicity dared to lower the book, watching the gossip girls taking their things and leaving.

Sighing, she put her book back to the table and stroked her hand over the side of her bump where her little baby girl was kicking against her ribs right now. Only at night she was even more active than she was in the late hours of the afternoon. Felicity was already sure the little girl would be a troublemaker.

“Everything alright?”

Felicity looked up from her book to Laurel, who was watching her worriedly.

“I’m fine,” she said with a sigh, stroking her hand over the bump once more. “I am just not sure I will ever get used to the gossip.”

“Oh, don’t worry,” Sara replied. “I will keep chasing them away as long as you need me to.”

“She’s enjoying being the protective sister a lot,” Nyssa explained to Felicity, looking at Sara fondly.

“Yes, but if she continues like this, principal Harris is going to kick her out of school,” Laurel said, shooting her little sister a strict gaze. “A little bird told me you there was a complaint filed against you because you ripped out Helena Bertinelli’s extensions.”

Felicity quickly lifted her hand to put in front of her lips and keep herself from laughing out loud. The thought of Sara participating in a girls’ fight and pulling at Helena’s hair was just too funny. Sara wasn’t really the type of girl to do that. Picturing her punching a guy in the face would be a lot easier actually, Felicity thought.

“I don’t think this is funny,” Laurel whispered urgently, shooting Felicity, Nyssa and Sara, who all seemed way to amused for Laurel’s liking, strict gazes. “Felicity, I am all in for protecting you and supporting you, but, Sara, that is only one more reason why you should try to calm down a little bit. You won’t be of any help if Mr. Harris kicks you out of school.”

“Yeah, okay. I’ll try pull myself together, but if that bitch with her fake hair says one more word about my little niece, I am going to-“ Sara started after a sigh, but stopped given the way Laurel was still looking at her strictly. She sighed once more. “Fine, I’ll try to avoid her.”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, stopping herself from bursting out in laughter at the face Sara made. She wished she would have had sisters like Sara and Laurel earlier in her life, Felicity thought with a quiet smile. They really made everything better. They made her feel better, and aside from Oliver they were her only confidantes. They were the only ones who knew about Oliver being the father and the two of them still being together. They even helped her see him more often. She didn’t know what she’d do without them and their support.

Smiling, Felicity lowered her gaze back to the book. She knew she didn’t really remember what the last passages had said, but she didn’t want to spent all evening here, so Felicity shortly considered just skipping the article completely. What was one article more or less, right? Well, maybe that article was really important or maybe it wasn’t. She sighed, knowing that she would be awake all night and think about whether or not this damn article was important if she didn’t read it now. So she started all over once more.

She had just reached the second passage when the baby again started kicking and distracted her with it. Felicity rubbed her hand over the bump where she felt the little feet against her insides, trying to ignore it other than that. It made the little girl only kick more firmly against her insides.

“Something wrong?” Sara asked when Felicity sighed.

“Baby’s trying to distract me from studying,” Felicity replied, and she rolled her eyes when she first felt her bump vibrating and then start to move rhythmically. “And now she’s got a hiccup.”

Sara chuckled. “She’s not even born and driving you insane already.”

“Yeah,” Felicity replied with a quiet smile, shaking her head. “She seems to have a talent for that.”

“Well, you have more than half of the pregnancy behind you already. Only sixteen more weeks to due date,” Laurel replied. “I am already excited to see if she’s as active when she’s born.”

“I hope she’s not. It would-“ Felicity started, but quickly stopped when two boys sat down at the free table next to theirs. “Never mind.”

Laurel, Sara and Nyssa’s eyes followed Felicity’s gaze to the guys shortly before all four of them focused back on their readings.

Felicity liked talking about the baby, or at least she didn’t mind. Talking helped her to feel how real the situation was. She really was having a baby. She just didn’t like talking about her baby girl in school when there was the danger that someone would overhear them talking. She didn’t mind with Tommy sitting at the other table because from what she had heard, he didn’t engage in the gossip about her. She didn’t want the guys at that other table to listen, though.

She didn’t know their names, only remembered the guys from seeing them in the hallways now and then. And if her memory didn’t fail her, they weren’t really nice guys. She didn’t want to give them anything more to gossip about by talking about the baby in their presence.

Felicity tried focusing back on her reading once more. She kept one hand on the bump, hidden between Laurel’s and her body, so nobody could see. Showing affection to the baby in public wasn’t easy because she knew it was only going to be turned against her. When her little girl kicked against her ribs particularly firmly, though, her hand moved more the front of her bump, and she regretted it immediately when she was met with the reaction she had feared it would get.

“Stroking your fat, blondie?” the one guy asked her loudly.

Felicity leaned forward a little, propping he head up onto her hand. Her hair fell to her face, shielding her from the guys’ gazes enough, so she felt a little safer. She couldn’t shut out their voices, though.

“I don’t even get why someone would knock her up. Your body and those glasses – disgusting! There are so much prettier girls in school.”

“Hey, who asked you to say anything about this, Fuller?” Sara asked him. “How about you keep your ugly nose in your own stuff?”

Max Fuller, Felicity remembered. Oliver had told her about him. He was part of the football team and as far as she had taken from Oliver’s words, he was an ass. He hated Oliver since he had slept with the girl Fuller had been interested in. That had have to been right around the time when he had become the douche bag he was now.

Felicity tried to keep her eyes on the book, but she couldn’t stop herself from looking up for a short moment. Her eyes met Sara’s face. Her stepsister’s eyes were focused on somewhere behind Felicity where she was actually sure Oliver was sitting. It took a lot from Felicity to not glance back over her shoulder and look at where her stepsister was looking. If Sara’s slightly worried expression was any indication, Oliver didn’t react to Fuller’s words well.

Of course he didn’t, Felicity thought, biting down on her tongue. Oliver hated all the gossip about her, and he hated what it did to her. He did his best to control himself, but when it was only them, he let no doubt in how angry he really was. If it wasn’t for his hard training in the gym when he could get rid of his frustration, Felicity was sure he would explode rather sooner than later.

“I’m fine, so just ignore them,” Felicity said, glancing at Fuller and his friend. She said it a little louder than necessary, making sure that Oliver could hear her.

“Just ignore them,” Fuller mimicked her with a condescending laugh. “You should have told the guy who knocked you up to ignore you. Poor idiot. On the other hand who’s blind enough to fall for someone like you maybe doesn’t deserve otherwise.”

“Can’t you just shut the hell up, Max?” Laurel asked. “There are people trying to study here.”

“Wow, the great Laurel Lance avowing for her poor stepsister. It melts my heart.”

“Hey, you heard them, Fuller. Leave them alone,” Tommy hissed.

“Just keep out of it, Merlyn.”

“I might to do so if you wouldn’t be talking so annoyingly loudly because Laurel’s right; people are trying to study here. So you better shut up, or I’ll let you get kicked out of the library.”

Felicity looked back over her shoulder to Tommy and Oliver. When Tommy looked at Max angrily, she used the opportunity to mouth towards Oliver that she was fine. He seemed tense, and Felicity wasn’t sure if her mouthed words could do anything to help with that, but it was the only thing she could do right now.

When Tommy turned his head back to keep reading his book, Felicity did the same. She smiled at Laurel shortly, shrugging her shoulders. Laurel rolled her eyes about Fuller’s behavior in reply. She rubbed her stepsister’s shoulder comfortingly before she turned her focus back to the book she was reading.

“I guess you can only hope that your baby doesn’t inherit your looks; would be a big obstacle to be born with,” Fuller continued.

Next to Felicity Laurel lifted her gaze from her book with a sigh and straightened up on her chair to keep watch for the librarian. Her hand meanwhile grabbed Felicity’s fingers under the tabletop, squeezing comfortingly.

It didn’t happen often that someone attacked her as openly as Fuller did. The most people just talked about her or made fun about her, but they just weren’t as aggressive as Fuller was when they did so. Luckily, Felicity should add, because she wasn’t sure if she could deal with an attack like this every day for the rest of her time in school.

“Hey, if you’re having a daughter and she’s pretty, I might lay her one day far in the future, though.”

She hadn’t even fully progressed Fuller’s words when Oliver was already getting up, overturning his chair behind him. With two large steps he was at Fuller’s table, tossing it away, so there was no barrier between them anymore. In one fluent movement he grabbed the lapels of Fuller’s jacket, and pushed him firmly, so he ended up on the floor. Within the beat of a second Oliver was kneeling on the floor and leaning over Fuller. He hauled off and punched Fuller, hitting his face with a firm fist again and again.

It all happened so fast, and Felicity felt frozen in place, unable to move. She just stared at Oliver punching Fuller. She was holding her breath, hearing the blood rushing in her ears. Her thoughts were standing still.

“Just shut up,” Oliver growled, accenting each word with a punch into Fuller’s already bleeding face, “and leave her the hell alone.”

A cold shiver ran down the length of her spine at how dangerous he sounded. His face showed an anger she had never seen in him. She had only gotten to know him as the gentle boyfriend and occasional spoiled rich boy he was, but never had she seen him like this. Never had she seen him this out of himself with anger. He almost sounded and looked like he was going to kill Fuller, beating him to death right here in the library in the middle of the day.

“Oliver, stop!” Tommy was the first one to react.

Quickly he ran to his friend, holding his right arm while Oliver was hauling off once more. Oliver fought his friend’s hand, trying to hit Fuller again. Laurel was the next one to find her ability to move again. She took Oliver’s other arm, helping Tommy to move him off Fuller, who was groaning in pain. They moved him several feet back, but they had trouble doing so since Oliver was still trying to fight them and get back to Fuller.

“Oliver!” Tommy yelled, trying to make Oliver focus on him, but his piercing blue eyes stayed focused on Fuller, who was now turning on his side and getting up on his wobbly legs.

“That’s it, Queen. Now you’re definitely getting kicked out of school,” Fuller said, pointing his finger at Oliver. “I will personally take care of that.”

“I don’t care,” Oliver replied. His voice was still lowered to the dark growl. He stopped his fight against Tommy’s and Laurel’s hands, just looking at Fuller for a long moment. “I don’t care what you do to me, but if I hear you say anything about Felicity or our daughter ever again, I swear to god it’s the last time you'll say anything to anyone, Fuller.”

His voice had grown louder with every word, and as soon as the last syllable had escaped his lips, he had started fighting Tommy and Laurel’s hands on him again. Oliver seemed so out of himself, Felicity wasn’t sure if he even knew what he had just revealed to everyone who was around, watching the scene. He had said it. He had told everyone around that the baby she was carrying was their baby.

When it seemed like Oliver would be able to free himself from the hands that were holding him back, Felicity felt herself being released from whatever had frozen her in place. Quickly she crossed the distance between them.

“Oliver,” she whispered as soon as she was standing right in front of him, putting her hands to his cheeks to frame his face. “Oliver, hey.”

Immediately his eyes focused on her. He stopped fighting Tommy and Laurel. His breathing, that had grown erratic in the struggle to get free, calmed down. The mad expression in his face that she had found to be so dangerous slowly gave way to the gentle expression she had gotten to known on him.

“Hi,” she whispered because in a weird way it felt like he was just now getting back to himself and really recognizing her.

Felicity looked at Laurel, nodding to her shortly, and slowly Laurel let go of Oliver’s arm. Immediately he wrapped it around her waist tightly, pulling her right against his chest. With a low sigh Felicity rested her head under Oliver’s chin and closed her eyes while Oliver other arm was now wrapping around her too. Oliver held her tightly, crushing her against him as tightly as possible. He pressed a kiss to the crown of her head.

They stayed like that for a long moment, wrapped into each other’s arms. Felicity could feel Oliver’s heartbeat slowing down under the palm of her hand, and she felt her body starting to tremble with the shock of what had just happened. Oliver only tightened his arms around her in response, holding her tightly like he was scared she’d fall apart in his arms. His lips pressed to her hair once more, and Felicity took in a deep breath, trying to regain her self-control.

“You and computer engineer Bar-“ Tommy started, but he stopped, clearing his throat. “You and Felicity?”

Felicity felt Oliver tense against her, telling her that she had been right before. He had been so out of himself that he hadn’t even realized what he had said. And only now it seemed to get through to him. Oliver loosened his arms around Felicity slightly, leaning back enough, so he could look at her. His eyes showed regret and maybe a little bit of fear.

“I’m so-“ he started, but he was interrupted.

“You are the baby’s father? Oh, this is only getting better.”

When Felicity felt Oliver moving to push her to the side, probably intending to clear the way back to Max Fuller, she tightened her hands in the fabric of his shirt. She shook her head, making Oliver look at her.

“Don’t,” she whispered. “I’m fine. We’re fine.”

Saying those last words, she took one of Oliver’s hands and placed them on the bump, smiling through the tears that sprang to her eyes when she felt the baby kicking against his fingers. She took in a sniffling breath, gulping down the lump that burnt in her throat and repeated, “We’re fine.”

Oliver slouched his shoulders, the tension falling off his body. He rested his forehead against Felicity’s with a sigh of exhaustion and tiredness, whispering, “I’m so sorry, Felicity.”

“I know,” she whispered back. “I know. Don’t worry about it.”

“I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.”

He whispered it again and again like he was desperately trying to make her know that he hadn’t done this on purpose, and he hadn’t wanted to do this and regretted it wholeheartedly. There was no reason for him to that, though, because Felicity knew. She knew he hadn’t wanted to tell people. Fuller had attacked her and the baby, and Oliver had seen red. He wouldn’t have told people against her will if he had been in control about himself. She knew that.

Felicity also knew that everyone around was talking, and she didn’t have to look to know that most of them had their phones probably in their hands already, spreading the news of who the baby’s father was. In the distance, she could hear Fuller and some other people talk, but it seemed far away and barely louder than a whisper over the sound of Oliver’s heavy breathing.

“Come on, we better go,” Felicity suggested, squeezing his hand on her bump.

Oliver nodded. He nuzzled his nose with hers and took in a deep breath. Only then did he slowly take a step back, nodding once more. He didn’t let go of her hand when he turned around to go back to the table he had been working at before.

They didn’t get far, though, because as soon as they had taken a few steps, one of the teachers came rushing in. He shouldered his way through the crowd of watching students, taking in the picture before him.

Tables and chairs were tossed aside. Books, pencils and other school supplies were on the floor. Fuller was leaning against a table, holding his bleeding nose. Tommy, Laurel, Sara and Nyssa were standing aside. Oliver was holding Felicity’s hand, keeping her close to her side. The bruises on the knuckles of his right hand left no doubt who was responsible for Fuller’s face.

“All of you,” the teacher whose name Felicity couldn’t remember said, pointing his finger at everyone who seemed to be involved, “in Principal Harris’ office right now. The rest of you will leave. Now.”

While the crowd slowly started to dissolve, Felicity looked at Oliver worriedly, but he shook his head like he was trying to tell her there was nothing to worry about. He squeezed her fingers in silent comfort before he let go, and they both went to get their things, just like the others did.

When they were ready, Oliver took Felicity’s bag from her shoulder, putting the strap over his own shoulder instead. He also took the books she was carrying on her arm so there was nothing left for her to carry. He winked playfully when she rolled her eyes at that, but Oliver only smiled, and took her hand, tugging her close to his side when they followed the teacher to the principal’s office.

 

 

“How could you not tell me?” Tommy whispered urgently. “I understand that maybe you didn’t want anyone else to know, but me? I’m your best friend. How long has that thing between you two going anyways?”

Oliver barely listened to Tommy. Instead he watched Felicity worriedly. Since they had left the library, Felicity had only grown quieter. She was sitting on the chair next to him in the principal’s office while they were waiting for Mr. Harris to finish talking to Fuller outside and come to talk to them instead. Her head was lowered. Her hair had fallen to her face, so he couldn’t see it. He didn’t need to see her face to know that she was nervous, though. The way she was tugging at the sleeves of her shirt was enough for him to know that.

“Is she the reason why you stopped coming to parties? I mean the fact that she’s been pregnant for month means that you must have been together for quite some time already. Or did you just fall in love with her later and are now stepping up as the baby’s father, so she doesn’t have to do this alone?”

Continuing to ignore his friend’s voice, Oliver reached out his hand slowly. He took one of Felicity’s hands from her lap and lifted it to his lips. He kissed her knuckles, not leaving her out of sight. Felicity turned her head only shortly, though, smiling at him through tears in her eyes. Quickly, she lowered her gaze back to her other hand in her lap.

Oliver bit his tongue, trying to figure out what else he could do to comfort her and make her feel better. He knew she was worried; worried about what would happen now that everyone knew he was the father. It had been one of her worst nightmares. He needed her to know that this didn’t mean that all the rumors were going to get worse. He would be there and help her get through this from now on, more than he had been able to do before.

“And what are the two of you going to do now?” Tommy kept asking. “Are you going to get married? And then what? Move in together and play happy family like this is all going to be easy? Damn it, Oliver, why didn’t you tell me about any of this?”

Oliver didn’t answer. He could hear in Tommy’s voice that his friend was upset. He couldn’t deal with that right now, though. He needed to take care of Felicity first.

Quietly, Oliver slid his chair as close to Felicity’s as possible. He squeezed her fingers, and after a moment she looked at him. A single tear escaped her eye, rolling down her cheek. Oliver reached out his hand and gently wiped it away.

“You don’t have to be scared,” he whispered.

“What if he suspends you?” Felicity asked, taking in a sniffling breath. “I don’t want you to get kicked out of school.”

“I won’t,” Oliver replied, not sounding too convinced unfortunately. “Look, my parents spend a lot of money each year, and I don’t think they want to delay my graduation, so they will do whatever they have to to keep me in school. You won’t be alone, okay?”

Felicity took in another deep breath and wiped away some more tears that had fallen. She turned on her chair, putting her other hand to the one of his that was already holding her other hand. She moved her fingertips over the bruised knuckles before she looked at him again.

“What if Max Fuller or his parents sue you or push Harris to kick you out?”

“Every story has two sides,” Oliver replied, squeezing her fingers once more. “Fuller harassed you. If they kick me out, they should kick him out too. And if Harris doesn’t need his favorite student being pregnant, then he doesn’t need two of his rich kids getting kicked out either.”

“Oliver, you probably broke his nose,” Felicity whispered urgently.

“He deserved it,” Sara commented. “If Oliver hadn’t broken his nose, I might have done it instead.”

“That would have been the first and last time anyone would have ever seen me cheer,” Nyssa added, and without looking away from Felicity, she held out her fist for Sara, who bumped her fist against Nyssa’s with an unashamed grin.

“I am not exactly saying that he doesn’t deserve this, but you broke his nose,” Felicity repeated even more urgently than before.

“Well, those were good punches,” Laurel replied to that.

Felicity looked at her stepsister with wide eyes. Oliver felt a weird feeling of pride at those words, but he stopped himself from letting the grin spread on his face. Felicity was too worried to smile about this.

“I am sorry, but haven’t you been the one to tell me that I should stop ripping out people’s extensions?” Sara asked her sister.

Laurel only shrugged her shoulders. “I am your older sister. I am allowed to do things you aren’t allowed to do. And after what Max said about Felicity and our niece, I think he absolutely deserved this.”

“So all of you knew about Oliver and Felicity the entire time?” Tommy asked, obviously getting more impatient to get his answers. “You knew they were dating? You knew he is the father? Is he the father? I mean are you the father? And if you are, how do you think you will do this?”

Oliver was about to answer because he thought that maybe if he appeased Tommy, the situation would be a little more relaxed. He didn’t get the chance to explain everything that had happened in the last months, though, because before he could, the door opened. Principal Harris stepped into the office, followed by Felicity as well as Oliver’s parents.

He could feel Felicity’s hand move in his, and loosened the grip he had on her fingers, so she could pull her hand back if she wanted to. He knew they would have to tell their parents now, but if she didn’t want them to suspect the truth before they got the chance to tell them, he got that. Felicity didn’t pull her hand away, though. Instead her fingers tightened around his hand in slight panic, and he squeezed gently, making her look at him. He gazed at her intensely, trying to tell her without any words that she wasn’t alone and he was right here with her. And when she gave him the slightest of a smile, he smiled back.

“You four can wait outside,” Principal Harris stated, looking at Laurel, Sara, Nyssa and Tommy. “Mr. Queen and Ms. Smoak will stay here a little longer.”

Sara, Laurel and Nyssa exchanged quick glances before they took their bags and jackets and left the office. Tommy’s gaze stayed on Oliver’s face for a moment longer, and only when he nodded to his friend, telling him that it was okay to go, did Tommy get his things and leave too. Now it was only Mr. Harris, Felicity and her parents as well as Oliver and his parents left in the small room.

Oliver looked into the adults’ faces closely. His own parents seemed confused about what was going on here, and maybe even annoyed that they had been called here. They had probably been told already that he had acted out and just didn’t get the connections yet. Donna seemed worried as she was watching her daughter with one hand pressed to her heart and the other clenched around her husband’s fingers the same way her daughter held onto Oliver’s hand. Quentin’s eyes were fixed on Felicity and Oliver’s entangled fingers, and if the expression in his eyes was indication, he was probably suspecting what connections there were already.

“Mr. Queen,” Mr. Harris said, sitting down behind his desk with a sigh, “maybe you want to give us all more insight in why you felt the necessity to break Mr. Fuller’s nose.”

Oliver bit back the words that were already on the tip of his tongue. How much he would like to punch Mr. Harris too! After what he had put Felicity through by trying to talk her into giving their child away, he would definitely deserve the one or other punch.

“Max offended Felicity and the baby,” Oliver said, squeezing Felicity’s fingers without looking at her. His eyes stayed on Mr. Harris’ face instead. “He was asked to shut up several times, but he didn’t.”

“So you broke his nose?” Mr. Harris asked.

“Yes,” Oliver simply replied.

A long moment of silence followed. Oliver knew that Mr. Harris knew that he was the baby’s father, and he was very sure that he also knew that Oliver knew about what had happened here in the office a few weeks ago. Mr. Harris knew that Felicity had told Oliver about how he had tried to talk her into giving their baby away for an open adoption. The fact that Mr. Harris seemed to show no regret about that only made Oliver want to punch him even more.

“Oliver, will you please tell us what’s going on here now?” his mother demanded from him strictly.

Slowly Oliver turned his gaze from Mr. Harris to Felicity’s and his parents, standing by the door. He squeezed Felicity’s fingers without looking at her once more and got up from his chair because he felt he shouldn’t sit when he told their parents what he had wanted to tell for so long.

He felt weirdly nervous now, though. What if his parents freaked out and sent him to boarding school like Felicity feared? What if her parents didn’t allow him to see Felicity and their baby anymore? Oliver bit his tongue, telling himself to concentrate on the situation at hand. One step at a time.

“Captain Lance, Mrs. Smoak-Lance, mom, dad,” he started, feeling Felicity getting up behind him and leaning against his side slightly, never letting go of his hand. “Felicity is pregnant by me. We’re together, and we’re having a baby, this baby. Together.”


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I asked for someone to create a cover for the story, I was delightedly surprised when I was offered two great art works! Since I loved both of them so much, I wanted to use both of them. So I talked to the artists, and they agreed to let me use their covers each for one half of the story.
> 
> Since we are now half-way through the story - we’ve passed seven chapters, eight chapters more are coming - now is the time to introduce the second cover by slowburninglove.

“Mr. Oliver?”

Oliver looked up from the ultrasound picture in his hand to find Raisa standing in the open door and looking at him with a gentle smile.

She was the second person who smiled at him since he had revealed that he was going to be a father yesterday. Thea had been the other person who had smiled at him. She was so excited to be an aunt. Since she knew about the baby, she had searched the web for baby names almost non-stop. Until now she hadn’t found a name that he had liked. It turned out he was quite picky when it came to his daughter’s name. On the other hand, Thea didn’t seem too picky, neither about the name nor about what she wanted to know about her niece. She had already asked him a thousand questions about her.

His parents on the other hand were punishing him with silence. Right after the reveal in Mr. Harris’ office they had yelled at him, and they had also yelled at him on their entire way back home. The moment the door had fallen shut behind them, though, they had fallen silent, and neither of them had talked to him since.

“Raisa,” Oliver said, smiling back at her. He pushed the picture of his unborn daughter in the back pocket of his jeans, and sat up on his bed. “Everything alright?”

“Your father wants to talk you. He’s waiting for you in his office.”

“What about mom?” Oliver asked in surprise.

“Mrs. Queen left half an hour ago.”

Oliver nodded slowly. This couldn’t be good. He doubted that his father would accept how he and Felicity had decided to handle this situation. He wouldn’t approve of his son becoming a dad so young even if there was no way Oliver would ever change the decision they made. He wasn’t sure if it was any different with his mother, but he would rather count on her support than on his father’s.

If his dad needed to hear that from him, though, Oliver would tell him. The sooner he knew that Oliver would not change his decision of raising this baby with Felicity, the better.

Sighing, Oliver got up from the bed. Raisa walked next to him through the hallway and towards the stairs, neither of them saying anything for awhile. It was a comfortable silence, though. It almost reminded him of how Raisa had silently sat down next to him and offered him her special chocolate chip cookies when his parents had yelled at him.

“Raisa?” Oliver asked when they were half-way down the stairs.

“Yes, Mr. Oliver?”

“Could you bake some of your chocolate chip cookies?” he asked, pushing his hands into the pockets of his jeans.

Raisa smiled. “A difficult situation right now, isn’t it?”

Oliver breathed out a laugh. “Very difficult actually, but the cookies are not for me. They are for Felicity.”

“You’re a good boy, Oliver,” Raisa stated when they reached the foot of the stairs. She turned around to him, putting one hand to his cheek and smiling at him almost motherly. “You’re a really good boy, Mr. Oliver.”

“I am trying to be.”

She smiled at him for a moment longer, giving him a nod of her head. Then she turned around and left towards the kitchen. Oliver looked after her for a long moment before he turned around and headed to his father’s office.

He could almost hear his voice telling him how disappointed he was in him already. His father probably really was disappointed in him. Oliver hadn’t only been kicked out of the football team as punishment for acting out the way he had done, but he was also going to be a father at eighteen years old. Those were two good reasons for his father to be disappointed in him.

Oliver barely remembered how at the beginning of the pregnancy, before they had made their decision to keep the baby, this had been what he had been most scared of. He had been scared that his parents would be disappointed in him when he came home and told them that Felicity was pregnant. Now it was different, though. He still wasn’t looking forward to see his parents’ disappointment, but at least now he knew that keeping the baby was the right decision. He just knew it was which would make standing up for the decision easier.

When he reached the door to his father’s office, Oliver stopped and took in a deep breath. He knew what he wanted, and now it was time to vouch for that.

He knocked at the door quietly, and the sound was immediately followed by his father’s deep voice saying, “Come in, Oliver.”

Oliver opened the door, finding his father sitting behind his desk with a glass of scotch in his hand. He seemed tired and yet weirdly relaxed. Oliver knew, though, that after decades of being the C.E.O. of a multibillion-dollar-cooperation his father had perfected the talent of not showing his tension openly. It would weaken his bargaining hand if the partner could see right through him.

“Please sit down,” Robert requested calmly, nodding towards the free chair on the opposite side of the desk.

He was already halfway across the room when Oliver decided otherwise. He stood still in the middle of his father’s office, straightening up and squaring his shoulders.

“Dad, I know what you’re going to say,” Oliver started, feeling a little bit nervous about how his father looked at him with an unreadable poker-face. “I understand that you are disappointed in me. What happened yesterday was… not acceptable. What Fuller did was wrong, but I still shouldn’t have acted out like I did. I deserved to get kicked off of the team, and I understand that you are angry about that.”

A part of Oliver felt his insides twist and turn at his own words because actually Fuller still deserved that broken nose. He might have even deserved a lot worse for what he had said. Still another part of Oliver knew that Fuller had only said it to provoke Tommy with it. He had wanted Tommy to act out on him. Well, he couldn’t have known that his provocation had actually been a lot worse for Oliver than for Tommy. Oliver could kick his own butt, though, for falling right into Fuller’s trap. At least Fuller had also been kicked off the team, a little satisfaction.

“I will try my best to earn your pride back, but I will not leave Felicity or change my mind about how we decided to handle her pregnancy. Felicity and I talked a lot, and we know there are still a lot of questions we need to answer, but we both know that we want to have this baby. We didn’t stumble into this blindly. We decided this together, and we’re in this together. So before you ask me to leave her or our daughter-“

Robert lifted his hand without saying a word, making Oliver fall silent immediately. He fought the urge to push his hands into the pocket of his pants and hunch his shoulders, tightening his hands to fists instead. With held breath he waited for his father to say something.

“I wasn’t going to ask you to leave them.”

“What?” Oliver asked after a short moment of silence. He was almost sure that he looked at his father just as dumbfounded as his question had sounded. He just wasn’t sure if he had really heard his father say what he believed he had.

Robert put the glass of scotch aside. Resting his forearms on the desk, he leaned forward a little. He looked at his son for a long moment, eying him up without saying a word.

“What you just said was probably the most mature thing I’ve ever hear you say,” Robert finally said. “You are right with what you said about acting out on Max Fuller. That was wrong, and you deserved to get kicked out of the team for that. I think you could have had a future with that sport, but you chose to throw that away. Neither your mother, nor I approve to that. We will still have to discuss how you can make up to us for this disappointment.”

Oliver nodded slowly. He hadn’t expected his father to accept the school’s decision on how to punish Oliver for what he’s done and let that be enough. He had known that his parents were going to add something more to that. He wouldn’t fight his father on that.

Still holding his breath, Oliver waited for his father to continue.

“Just like I don’t accept to you acting out in that brutal way, I don’t like that you’re becoming a father at such a young age.”

“I’m still not going to-“

“Like I already said,” Robert interrupted Oliver firmly, “I won’t ask you to leave your child or the mother. I am sure there would have been times when you would have left your girlfriend alone with the responsibility of the decision and its consequences. The fact that you chose to make that decision with her and stand with her through this instead of running away is clearly a sign that you’re growing up. You made the hard but right and mature decision here. So I would have clearly appreciated if you had waited to become a father for another ten years, but I am very proud that you decided to take the responsibility instead of getting out of the affair by leaving the girl alone with it.”

His father’s words kept playing on his mind on repeat. He was proud of how Oliver had chosen to react to the situation. He was proud. He had actually said the words out loud. Of course he wasn’t happy that this was happening at all, but he was proud of how Oliver was dealing with this. Oliver knew his thoughts were spinning around, repeating always the same things, but he couldn’t help it. His father was proud of him despite everything.

When his lungs started burning due to the breath he still held, Oliver released the air from his lungs, feeling his heart beating firmly against his ribs in response. Slowly he crossed the rest of the room and sat down in the chair his father had offered him before.

“What about mom?” Oliver asked quietly.

“She’s still in shock, I’d say.”

Oliver nodded. Who wouldn’t be in shock about this? God, even he himself was still kind of shocked about all of this. He had never imagined becoming a dad at such a young age until the moment Felicity had given him that positive pregnancy test a few months ago. And even he himself had needed time, so of course so did his mother.

“She’ll come around eventually,” Robert said. “She just needs time.”

Again Oliver nodded. He just hoped his dad was right, and she would come around with some time. If his dad had, Oliver felt optimistic about his mother, though. She’d come around, too. She actually had to because neither Felicity nor their daughter were going to disappear from his life.

Maybe none of this was as bad as Felicity and he had thought it would be. They had feared their parents’ reaction, but his father’s calm reaction now was at least some reason to feel hopeful that maybe it wouldn’t turn into a terrible drama. At least if-

Oliver cleared his throat. “Dad, can I ask you for a favor?”

“You can ask, but I can’t promise that I will oblige.”

“It’s… Felicity’s scared that if the gossip media will find out about this, she’ll be terrorized by paparazzi. I don’t think that turmoil would be good for her or our little girl, so I thought-“

“I’ll take care that nothing will leak.”

Oliver just nodded, trusting his father to take care of it. He knew that his parents had influential friends in a lot of areas, the media included. His parents were also friends with the Fullers, so hopefully Max wouldn’t be able to take revenge on him for the broken nose by spilling the news to the media. Besides, his parents had really good lawyer who had managed to keep a lot of news from being published already. In case something leaked after all, they might be able to keep it from being published.

Robert leaned back in his seat, watching his son for awhile without saying anything. Eventually he asked, “How are you feeling?”

“Relieved that it’s finally out,” Oliver replied with a sigh, “and scared about the future.”

“Trust me, son,” Robert said with a chuckle, lifting the glass of scotch to his lips and taking a sip, “you’d be scared even if you were ten years older.”

Oliver narrowed his eyes a little, eying his father up nosily. “You want to tell me that you’ve been scared, too?”

“When your mother was pregnant with you? Nine month of panic,” Robert replied, chuckling once more. “It got easier with Thea, but still quite scary.”

“I thought it was the young age that made this so scary,” Oliver replied with a smile.

“No, I can guarantee you that it’s independent from age. Becoming a father is a scary thing.”

Oliver nodded with a sigh. His dad was right. It was a scary thing, and Oliver was glad that he wasn’t the only father-to-be feeling like this. Being responsible for such a little human being, well, who wouldn’t be scared of that?

It was weird, Oliver thought. He had been so scared of his father’s reaction. He had thought he’d sent him to boarding school in case he didn’t rip off his head immediately. He had thought he’d never accept Oliver’s decision to raise this baby with Felicity.

Instead they seemed to be closer now than they had been in a long time. Oliver couldn’t remember when he had shared a moment like this with his father for the last time.

He could just hope that it wouldn’t be any worse for Felicity. Her parents clearly hadn’t been pleased about the revelation yesterday, and he knew from the long phone call last night that they had been almost as quiet as his parents had been. He would call her later today and see how things were going for her now.

Hopefully things had taken a just as pleasant turn for her as they had for him.

 

 

Sighing, Felicity lifted her gaze from her book and looked at the framed ultrasound picture on her desk instead. It was the first picture that had been taken of the little girl growing in side of her, and even though she had several more pictures by now, she still found herself being drawn to this one a lot.

Nervously biting down on her bottom lip, Felicity tapped her pen on the desk and grabbed her phone. She had sent Oliver several text messages in the last hour, but he still hadn’t answered.

She knew that his parents, just like her own, had been punishing him with silence since he had told them that he was the baby’s father. Well, of course at first all four of them had been talking insistently to Oliver and her because they had been in shock. Felicity had thought that would have been bad, but the deadly silence that had followed had been even worse.

Only three hours ago Quentin and Donna had broken their silence. They had called her down to the living room and told her what she had known already. They were disappointed that she had kept her relationship to Oliver and the fact that he was the baby’s father a secret.

That wasn’t the worst part of it, though. She could live with them being disappointed and even angry at her. She probably deserved it. It was their thoughts about Oliver Felicity troubled with. Since her parents refused to believe that she had told the truth when she had been telling them that keeping Oliver a secret had been her idea, they blamed him. They thought he hadn’t wanted to take the responsibility and had wanted to have a way out for himself. He had made her keep it a secret, so he could back out at any time, but could still enjoy the benefits of having a girlfriend as long as it pleased him.

This was her fault. She had made Oliver keep it a secret, and that was why her parents thought the worst of him now. Hopefully, they would get over that soon. As long as they hadn’t gotten over it, though, Oliver was officially not allowed over here anymore.

Felicity snorted, shaking her head. What sense did it make to ban Oliver from the house now? If they believed he had tried to keep a way out, forcing him here to take care of her would be much more logical. Besides, it wasn’t like he could knock her up again, at least not in the next months until the baby was born.

Sighing, Felicity put her phone away and let the pen fall to the desk carelessly. It was time for a short break. Besides, she wouldn’t be able to concentrate until Oliver had texted her back and assured her that none of the nightmares she had had of his parents’ reaction were coming true, anyway.

So things at home had become worse for both of them now that the secret was out. Felicity could just hope that it would be different in school. Things had been bad there already. If they got any worse after his weekend because of everyone knowing about Oliver and her, it would be… unbearable.

Felicity had already set the first foot into the kitchen when the doorbell rang. Glancing at her watch, Felicity sighed. Sara had probably forgotten her keys again. She always forgot them. Well, Felicity could be lucky she had been downstairs already. Lately every step felt like a workout, and she still had almost four months to go. How was she going to move the next months until the baby was born?

“You know, Sara, if your head wasn’t fixed to your shoulders, I would be scared you’d forget it some-“

“Hello, Felicity.”

Felicity stopped midsentence, staring at the blonde woman in front of her. She was so neat-looking, while Felicity on the other hand was wearing yoga pants and a large sweater. She hadn’t put on any make-up, and her hair was put to a messy bun. She must look like she hadn’t showered in a week. Quickly Felicity put on a smile, but she was sure that it didn’t hide her nervousness.

“Mrs. Queen.”

She didn’t miss how her voice sounded just as nervous as her smile felt. She had always felt like Moira Queen’s close to perfect appearance had something intimidating to it. Until now she had never been alone with her. She had only run into her a few times during her internship at Queen Consolidated and during some other occasions, but those short encounters had been enough to make her feel weirdly uncomfortable in her presence. She was just so frighteningly perfect. She actually had even a little bit of an ice queen which Felicity knew wasn’t completely true because Oliver had told her that his mother was one of the warmest people he knew. She seemed to have been a great mother.

Nervously Felicity looked around. “Where’s Oliver?”

“He’s at home. I thought I should come here alone. That would give us a chance to talk.”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip insecurely. Moira Queen was smiling at her friendlily, and yet Felicity didn’t know if she really wanted to talk to her all on her own. She was her daughter’s grandmother, though, and if talking to her could help her progress that, maybe it wouldn’t be so bad after all.

“Yes, please come in,” Felicity asked, stepping aside and opening the door further.

Moira stepped into the small hallway, looking around and taking in the room. Felicity knew that her home looked like a joke compared to the Queen Mansion, but Oliver’s mother didn’t say a word about it. Wordlessly Felicity led her into the living room.

“Please make yourself comfortable. Is there anything I can offer you? Something to drink maybe or-?”

“No, thank you very much,” she said, sitting down on the couch. “I don’t want to be an inconvenience. I just want to talk.”

Felicity sat down on the edge of one of the armchairs hesitatingly. She wished Moira had wanted something to drink. That way she would have something to busy herself with and maybe earn herself a little time before she would have to talk to her.

“There are a few things I think we should talk about,” Moira stated.

She pulled a file out of her purse, putting it on the couch table and opening it. Felicity felt her breath getting caught in her throat when she saw a photo of herself stapled to the first side.

“What is that?” Felicity asked.

“Oh, I had one of our investigators write up a dossier on you.”

Felicity’s eyes widened. Was this really happening?

“I’m sorry,” Mrs. Queen said with a gentle smile, “but it’s a necessary precaution against a fraudulent claim of paternity.”

“The baby is Oliver’s.”

“Oh, of that I have no doubt,” Moira replied.

Felicity frowned. If she didn’t doubt that Oliver was the baby’s father, then why had she asked her investigators to find out things about Felicity in the first place? And what was she doing here with that… dossier?

“Our investors were quite thorough. But you can imagine how many people my family attracts who are looking for handouts.”

“I am not looking for money,” Felicity replied honestly.

She could barely hear her own voice over the rushing of blood in her ear. This situation just felt so surreal in a way. She had pictured a lot of possible scenarios of what would happen if Oliver’s parents would ever know about the baby. She should have probably considered that they would think of her as a gold digger just like she had thought the gossip press and everyone else in school would think too.

Why hadn’t she thought about that before? Maybe because Oliver had never thought she was one? Had she hoped that he would make sure that his parents weren’t going to think like that? Well, if that had been the reason, it was obviously stupid. Just as she hadn’t been able to convince her parents that Oliver wasn’t the bad guy in this, he had obviously been unable to make them know that she wasn’t interested in his money.

“Of course not,” Moira answered.

Felicity felt more and more like Moira’s smile was cold and wondered how she had missed that before. She should have seen it from the start, but she hadn’t.

Moira flipped through the pages of the file until she obviously found what she had been looking for. She took the envelope that was put between two pages and held it out to Felicity.

“I told you, I don’t want any money.”

Again Moira’s first answer was only a smile. After a moment she added, “And I am telling you that this is my first grandchild. And I want to make certain that she has a bright future. Please.”

Felicity bit down on her tongue. She didn’t like this situation. She didn’t like it at all. Unfortunately, she felt like the quickest way to get Moira Queen out of her home, was to take the envelope, even if she was going to give it back later.

Felicity’s hands were shaking slightly when she took it from Moira’s fingers. She looked at Moira, finding her looking back at her expectantly. So Felicity took in a deep breath and opened the envelope, looking at the check inside. Her eyes widened.

“This is a million dollars,” Moira explained unnecessarily since Felicity could see the number with the lot of zeros on the check already.

“I don’t… I don’t understand…” Felicity said. She put the check back into the envelope quickly, holding it out for Moira to take it back, but Moira stayed unmoving. “I mean… If there is any problem with money, I guess Oliver will… I mean… I don’t want his or rather your money, at least not that much. I just want to make sure my daughter has… everything she needs… I just… In case I might not be able to afford… I don’t know… but I don’t think all this money is necessary, and-“

“Just like I want to make sure that my granddaughter has a bright future,” Moira interrupted Felicity’s babble calmly, “I want to make certain that my son has one as well. That money is yours once you tell Oliver that he’s not the baby’s father.”

“What?!” Felicity asked with high-pitched voice, her eyes widening once more.

“And another million when after graduation you move to Boston and go to M.I.T. like I know you have planned to do and never speak to him again.”

Felicity stared at Moira, feeling like she was caught in a dream or something because this just couldn’t be happening. She couldn’t ask her to do something like this, and she couldn’t honestly believe that Felicity would do this.

What if one day her daughter would want to know about her father? What would she tell her? She would be forced to lie again. Or what if she and her daughter ran into Oliver one day and Oliver would realize that the little girl on Felicity’s hand looked just like him? What if the baby was getting sick and needed an organ-transplantation? Half of the little girl’s family wouldn’t be available to let themselves being tested as possible donators.

Besides, Oliver would never believe her that the baby she was carrying wasn’t his. He knew that she loved him and only him. Felicity wasn’t even a good liar, so even if he doubted her love, he would see right through the lie if she told him. And she wouldn’t tell him because lying to Oliver about this just wasn’t an option!

How could Moira even ask her to do something like this? How could she ask her to break Oliver’s heart? Because if he had made one thing clear yesterday during the moment in Harris’ office, it had been that he loved Felicity and the baby. How could she want to take this from Oliver?

“Can I offer you some advice, one mother to another?” Moira asked, closing the file. “When it comes to your children, there is no action that is inconceivable; there is not decision that is impossible. You do what you must do to provide the life that they need, and rather often you find yourself knowing what’s best for them better than they know themselves.”

“And you think the best for Oliver is if I leave?”

“I don’t know you, Felicity,” Moira replied, the smile still fixed to her face. “You seem like a nice, young woman with a great future ahead of her, but I don’t know you. I know my son, though. He is young, and he doesn’t know what he’s getting himself into. He’s not ready to be a father, as much as he might think he is. I want to protect him from making a mistake that will haunt him for the rest of his life.”

“Which is why you want me and the baby to disappear from his life,” Felicity added.

“Think about your own baby, Felicity. Once Oliver realizes that being a father requires a lot more than beating up whoever offends your child, he is going to be overwhelmed and leave. I love my son, but I think we can both agree that Oliver is not the most mature or responsible person. Your father left when you were a little girl. I am sure you don’t want the same for your daughter. Maybe for her it will be easier to never know her father than to be disappointed in him for leaving her.”

Moira was right. Her investigators really seemed to have been thorough. Felicity bit down on her tongue at the memory of her father leaving and of how devastated she had been then. She really had wished he had never been part of her life because it had hurt so much when he had left. She didn’t want this for her baby. Her daughter shouldn’t spend years of her life wondering why she hadn’t been good enough for him to stay. Neither should she think that she didn’t deserve to be loved like Felicity had done for a long time.

“You are responsible for your daughter’s future, Felicity, just like I am responsible for Oliver’s. We both only want what’s best for our children. I think that two million dollars is sufficient to provide the life that both our children need. Don’t you?”

Felicity just stared at Moira. She didn’t know what to say or if there was anything to say to this at all. She was just… speechless and that meant a lot because Felicity was never speechless. She always had something to say. Not about this, though.

“Think about it,” Moira stated. “I will find the way out on my own. Goodbye, Felicity.”

Felicity didn’t answer. She didn’t even watch Moira leave. She just watched into the empty space, playing through her memory of what had just happened. It still felt so surreal, and no matter how often she let the memory play in her head like a movie, it didn’t make it feel any more real.

Slowly Felicity looked down to the envelope she still held in her hand. Two million dollar. That was a hell of a lot of money.

Did Oliver know about this? The way Moira had phrased most of what she had said, Felicity didn’t believe it. But what if she had only said it that way to make sure it sounded liked Oliver had no idea she was here? What if everyone was right and Oliver really was sneaking his way out now that everybody knew? Maybe his parents had pressured him with whatever and he had decided to give into it and his mother showing up here was the result of that.

Felicity didn’t really believe that, but right now her head was spinning, and she just wasn’t sure. She didn’t know. She didn’t know anything anymore right now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short Warning: Due to the lot of work I have to do, I might not get around to post a chapter next week. Sorry for that!


	9. Chapter 9

Oliver walked up and down the hallway in front of the lockers nervously. He wished time would pass faster just this one time. When he glanced at his watch, hoping to find that several minutes had passed, he released a deep sigh and leaned back against the lockers. He rested his head against the cold metal and closed his eyes with another sigh.

He had to wait another five minutes until the last class of the day would be over. When the school bell would ring, all the students would leave the classrooms and head home, only stopping at the lockers to get rid of the books they wouldn’t need during the weekend.

At least that was what he was counting on Laurel doing before she left to go home. He needed to talk to her, and waiting for her at her locker had seemed like the best idea to do so. Oliver had even skipped his last class to make sure he wouldn’t miss her.

Sighing, Oliver closed his eyes and rubbed his hands over his face almost violently. He was tired and exhausted, a state he should have gotten used to by now. Since he had found out that Felicity was pregnant, he had been tired and exhausted a lot. It was the worries he still wasn’t used to, and they were what made the tiredness and exhaustion feel so much more intense now. He felt like he needed to lie down and sleep for like twenty-four hours straight.

Oliver knew he wouldn’t be able to sleep unless he figured out what was wrong with Felicit. He hadn’t really talked to her in a week, and yet he knew something was wrong. It was actually the very reason why he knew something was wrong. Felicity hadn’t been in school the entire week. He had tried to call her several times, but she hadn’t taken the calls. She had only sent him few messages, telling him that she was a little sick, but it wasn’t too bad and he shouldn’t worry because she and the baby were going to be fine.

_Don’t worry. It’s just a little cold. All I need is some rest. Gotta catch some sleep now._

_Don’t worry_ , Oliver mentally repeated the words she had sent him and shook his head. How was he supposed not to worry with this?

He had tried to visit her. He had asked Raisa to make a chicken soup for her, the one she had always made for Thea and him when they had been sick. When he had arrived at her home, though, Captain Lance had opened and told him what he knew from Felicity already: He was banned from the Lances’ and Smoaks’ house.

Oliver hadn’t really expected anything different. Her parents hadn’t been excited about her pregnancy – what teenagers’ parents were excited about their daughter being pregnant at seventeen? – and of course they didn’t want him near her now. The pregnancy was partly his fault after all. Felicity was pregnant with their child and she was sick, though. Oliver had hoped there would be an exception for a situation like this.

Well, obviously there hadn’t been any exception made. And to be completely honest Oliver didn’t even really believe Felicity was sick anymore. Why wouldn’t she return calls if she was sick? Nobody was this sick for a week.

No, Oliver knew that there had to be some other reason for why she was avoiding him that much, and he had to find out what it was. Talking to Laurel seemed to be the surest way to find out.

As soon as the school bell rang, the doors to the hallway were opened and people started filling the room. Oliver waited right next to Laurel’s locker, keeping his gaze on the people walking past him. He couldn’t risk missing her because in that case he might have to wait the entire weekend before he got another chance to ask her what was wrong with Felicity. He couldn’t wait that long.

And he wouldn’t have to.

As soon as he saw Laurel approaching her locker, he squared his shoulders. He felt his thumb rub against the tips of his other fingers. It was a nervous tip Felicity had once pointed out to him. He tried to clench his fist, but his fingers refused to stop moving against each other.

Laurel was still several feet away when she looked up from the phone in her hand. As soon as she saw him, she slowed down and almost came to a stand. He watched her taking a quick look around like she was trying to bolt. He was just about to take a step towards her to make sure she wouldn’t run off when Laurel put on a smile and stepped in front of her locker, avoiding his gaze, though.

“Hi,” Oliver said, stepping right next to her and facing her.

“Oliver, hi,” Laurel said, only glancing at him for the split of a second. “Everything alright? I heard you were kicked off the football team and-“

“Laurel,” Oliver interrupted her firmly, making her fall silent immediately. “What’s wrong with Felicity?”

Laurel put her books into the locker, closing the door to it and locking it. Again she only shot him a short glance before she turned around, heading to the exit. Oliver was quick to follow her.

“She has a cold,” Laurel replied. “It’s not bad. She just needs some rest and-“

“That is crap,” Oliver hissed under his breath to make sure nobody would hear. He was already kicked out of the team. He didn’t need another punishment for swearing. “It is crap and you know it. Felicity isn’t sick.”

Laurel didn’t confirm his suspicion, but she didn’t deny it either. And actually that was all the confirmation Oliver needed. He had been right. Something else was wrong with Felicity. This wasn’t about her health, at least not physically. This was about something else.

They had already arrived at the parking lot when Oliver couldn’t take it any longer. He grabbed Laurel’s elbow firmly but not too tightly to hurt her. He used the hold to turn her around to him. Laurel pressed her lips together.

“Laurel, I need to know,” Oliver said urgently.

Releasing a quiet sigh, she freed her arm from his grip. “And I wish I could tell you, but I promised Felicity I wouldn’t tell anyone, not even you. Or maybe especially you and-“

“We kept our relationship a secret. We tried to keep her pregnancy a secret in school. We tried to keep a secret that I am the baby’s father. Where did keeping all these secrets lead us?” he interrupted her. “Felicity and I met in secret for months. Almost the entire school started bullying her when they found out she was pregnant. I broke Fuller’s nose because all the anger started boiling up. I got kicked off the football team. Tommy barely talks to me anymore. Felicity is not going to school regularly.”

All these secrets had caused more damage than they had done any good. Oliver had accepted them because he had known it had been what Felicity had wanted and because at least the two of them had shared the whole truth. He wouldn’t let himself be talked into keeping another secret, though, and he certainly wouldn’t let himself be kept in the dark about whatever was going on.

He needed to know what was wrong with Felicity and the baby. His father was working a lot. His mother was still distant to him. Tommy barely talked to him anymore. He needed Felicity and their daughter in his life, so he needed to know what was wrong with them. And he deserved to know.

“Laurel, I understand that you made a promised to her, but…”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders, unsure what else to say. It was now on Laurel to decide if she wanted to be loyal to her stepsister or if she wanted her to feel better. If he just knew what was going on with her, he could make her feel better. Oliver had to believe that.

Laurel sighed before she nodded. Not saying anything, she walked to the tall oak tree next to the entrance. Oliver followed her slowly.

“Okay, what’s-?”

“Your mother paid Felicity a visit.”

Oliver felt his breath getting caught in his throat. Except for her outburst in Mr. Harris’ office his mother hadn’t reacted to Felicity’s pregnancy at all. Even one week after the reveal she hadn’t lost a word about it, and she certainly hadn’t told him that she had visited Felicity.

“What-?”

“She offered her money,  _a lot_  of money,” Laurel said insistently, “if she tells you the baby isn’t yours and then leaves and never comes back.”

Oliver felt numb, terribly numb.

Maybe he would have thought his father would do something like this to preserve the family’s reputation because the family’s reputation had a direct influence on the company. Family and company carried the same name after all. His father loved that company. It was almost as important to him as his family. Sometimes it even seemed more important.

Obviously Oliver had been wrong, though. If Laurel was right, and she had no reason to lie to him, it was his mother who had offered Felicity something so terrible. It was even more horrible than he had ever thought his parents’ reaction would be. Oliver wasn’t sure what he had thought would be the worst his parents might do, but he knew he had never thought it would be this bad.

Suggesting she should lie to him about the paternity and leave…

How could his mother do this to him? How could she try to take Felicity and their daughter away from him? They were as much a part of his family as Thea and his parents were. How could she not understand that he wanted them close to him? How could she not understand that he really wanted to do this? That he wanted to participate in his daughter’s life and education? This was  _his_  daughter.

“Why didn’t Felicity come to me about this?” Oliver asked.

Laurel looked at him without saying anything. When he didn’t seem to get whatever she wanted to tell him without words, she perked up one eyebrow, eying him up and down. Only when she crossed her arms in front of her chest, though, Oliver got the hint.

“Wait,” he hurried to say. “You don’t mean to tell me that Felicity thinks I have anything to do with that, right?”

“The suggestion seems normal, doesn’t it?” Laurel asked back. “You’ve never been known for handling responsibility well, and everyone who knows you a little better than average knows that you and your mom are very close.”

“We are, or at least we were,” Oliver corrected after a short moment, unsure if he could forgive something like this. “I don’t have anything to do with this, though. I want to be involved in all of this. I want to be our baby’s father. I-“

“I am actually sure that Felicity knows that,” Laurel said with a sigh. “And I don’t think she actually believes that you asked your mother to come to her. She’s just confused. The situation is hard enough as it is, and your mother-“

“-made it worse,” Oliver said with a nod of his head.

Laurel nodded quietly, eying him up carefully, before she asked, “Are you okay?”

“No,” Oliver replied with a sigh, rubbing his hands over his tired face. “My mom just tried to take the two people I love most away from me. I am everything but okay.”

Again Laurel nodded. “I think you should go and talk to her. She needs you now more than ever, even if she might not be able to admit that.”

Oliver sighed, nodding his head. “Yeah, I will talk to her.”

“I just don’t know where she is. She usually leaves the house as soon as our parents head to work,” Laurel explained. “Maybe you-“

“I know where I can find her,” Oliver interrupted her. He had already turned to walk to his car when he turned back to Laurel once more. He pulled her into a quick hug, whispering, “Thank you.”

He didn’t wait for her to answer, though. Instead he hurried to his car with large steps. The sooner he was with Felicity, the better. He needed to reassure her that he was in this with her. He had actually hoped she would know this by now, but given that he had left her alone in the beginning, the suggestion that he was going back to that was probably not as far as he had hoped.

After he had talked to her, there would be no doubt left, though. He would take care of that.

 

Felicity breathed in through her nose and out through her lips. In through her nose and out through her lips again and again. Why didn’t help it calming her down? Sighing, Felicity put her elbows on her knees and rested her face in her hands.

It had been one week since Moira Queen had showed up on her doorstep and offered her all that money if she lied to Oliver and left him.

Gently, Felicity stroked her hand over her bump. What parent did this to their kid? What parent intruded in their child’s life like that? She just hoped she wouldn’t turn into a mother like that. Trying to take control over her child’s life like that was not something she ever wanted to do.

In the seven days since that unpleasant encounter, Felicity hadn’t been able to pull herself back together. She had tried to, but she just couldn’t. That offer had been so shocking that Felicity still wasn’t sure what to think about it.

Of course as soon as her state of shock had passed, she had sent the money back to Moira. She had meant what she had said. She didn’t want any money from the Queens. Of course she would appreciate if they financially supported the baby because she hadn’t any money herself, and her parents couldn’t pay everything either. She just wanted her daughter to have everything she needed, but given what Moira had offered her, Felicity wasn’t sure if she could take any money from the Queens now, even if it was for the baby. It would always feel like she was betraying Oliver and her daughter if she did so.

Oliver certainly didn’t know anything about the money Moira had offered. She had doubted that for the split of a second, and she was more than ashamed for that, but she had just been so confused after his mother’s visit. He had texted her so many times during the last week, obviously being worried about her and the baby, but Felicity hadn’t dared to call him back or see him. Her guilty conscience for thinking he had anything to do with his mother’s offer had been too loud to ignore.

She couldn’t talk to him about this, though. Moira was his mother, and Felicity didn’t want to drive a wedge between them. If that meant that she couldn’t talk to him about this, she would need to accept this.

She missed him, though. Talking to Oliver always helped calm her nerves. Since she couldn’t tell him about what had happened with his mother, she couldn’t see him at all, though. She couldn’t lie to him like that. Not telling him about this was one thing, but lying to his face and telling him that everything was alright was something completely different.

What was even worse was that Moira’s words now made her doubt the decision Oliver and she had made months ago.

What if raising this baby really was a mistake? It was not about raising it alone or with Oliver by her side but about raising this baby herself at all. Maybe it had been the wrong decision to start with. Raising a baby was a tough task, and she didn’t have the money to actually go with her decision. She wanted to go to college. How was she going to do that while raising a baby?

Maybe she and Oliver had stumbled into this blindly after all. They hadn’t made any detailed plans, and maybe that was their mistake. They wanted to have this baby and raise her, but they didn’t really know how, did they?

Before Moira’s visit it hadn’t been that complicated. It had actually been easy. They had known what they had wanted and had decided to take care of everything else once the finals were over, and they could really concentrate on the baby.

What if that was wrong, though?

It was a baby they were talking about after all. Raising a baby was not something they could just take as it came. There were decisions that needed to be made, and maybe decisions that even needed to be reconsidered because what happened when she realized that she couldn’t be a mother and go to college? What if she failed her child?

She had thought she was over those thoughts and fears, at least mostly. Those were the thoughts that had kept her awake during the first weeks after she had found out that she was pregnant. Moira’s visit had woken them again.

So what if Moira was right? What if Felicity had just lost herself in the illusion that all of this was going to work out? What if she couldn’t do any of this? What if maybe she found better parents for the baby? Parents who could offer the little girl more than she would ever be able to? Parents who had both feet on the ground. Parents who had the time and money and experience to make her daughter’s life better. Maybe that was what she was supposed to do for both of their sake’s, the baby’s and her own.

Felicity shook her head. This was where not talking to Oliver for a week was leading her to. She was drowning in self-doubts and self-pity, doubting the big decision they had made months ago. Her hands were shaking slightly when she pushed her hand into the pocket of her jeans and pulled out her phone. She had avoided Oliver for so long, too long probably. She should call him and talk to him, even if that meant telling him about his mother and what-

“Hey.”

Gasping for breath, Felicity started. Her phone fell from her fingers and to the floor with a loud noise. Quickly Felicity pressed her hand to her chest, trying to slow down her wildly beating heart, and turned around to the voice that had spoken to her form right behind her.

“Oliver,” she choked out, still trying to catch her breath.

“I’m sorry,” he hurried to say.

Quickly he bent down and grabbed her phone from the floor, checking it for any damage before he pushed it into her hands. Felicity put it into her purse while Oliver put one leg over the bench and sat down on it sidewise, straddling it. He slid closer to her, pushing his hand beneath her left knee and moving it to the other side of the bench, so she was mirroring his position, then pulled her closer until their knees were touching.

Without saying a word, he grabbed one of her hands and linked her fingers with his on the bump between their legs. Felicity just looked at him, her eyes following each of his movements, and just when she was about to ask him what he was doing here, he put his free hand to her cheek and leaned in. His lips brushed against hers shortly, making her breath get caught in her throat. Oliver nuzzled her nose with his for a short moment before his lips pressed to hers more firmly.

Humming against his lips, Felicity slid closer to him, putting her legs above his. She wrapped her arm around his neck and pushed the one hand Oliver wasn’t holding to the bump into his short hair, so she could angle his head and deepen the kiss. His tongue stroked against hers gently. She could feel the baby kicking, and if the way Oliver smiled into the kiss was one indication, she was sure that she could feel it against his abs.

The kiss was gentle and reassuring. Still it was a little too urgent for Felicity not to sense what was going on.

When their lips parted, Oliver stroked his thumb over her cheek and kept her face close to his. They breathed the same air, their breaths ghosting over each other’s face for a long moment. Oliver leaned in once more, her lips brushing against his softly one last time. When he pulled away this time, he leaned back far enough to look at her.

If the urgency of the kiss hadn’t been any indication, the way he looked at her now definitely was. He knew about the money his mother had offered her, and he had probably drawn his conclusion about her avoiding behavior ever since. Quickly, she took his hand from her face and put it to the other side of the bump. She squeezed his fingers firmly, looking at him pleadingly.

“I swear to god that I sent that money back,” she whispered quickly. “I didn’t take it, and I never even considered taking it. She just handed me that envelope, and then she said all those things and left. I was… in shock or whatever. As soon as I was over that first shock, I sent the money back. I wouldn’t have taken it, and I wouldn’t have lied to you about the baby’s father or left. I swear I would have-“

“Felicity,” Oliver interrupted her. His voice had been quiet and gentle, yet Felicity fell silent immediately. Oliver squeezed her fingers like she had done with his before. “I know you wouldn’t have taken the money.”

“You do?”

“Of course I do,” Oliver replied, gently bumping his nose against hers. “You’re too… I don’t know… I just don’t see you taking any of my mother’s money, especially given what she wanted in return.”

Felicity nodded, taking in a deep breath and releasing it with a sigh of relief.

“Did she tell you about this or did-“

“Laurel did,” Oliver interrupted her. “I don’t think I would have ever found out about this if she hadn’t told me. Even you didn’t tell me.”

Felicity lowered her gaze to their joint hands on his bump.

“She’s your mother,” Felicity whispered barely louder than a breath. “I don’t want you to get into a fight with her because of me.”

“Well, she should have thought about that before she offered you a lot of money to leave me and tell me the baby isn’t mine,” Oliver explained, tension audible in his voice. “You two are the most important people in my life, and I would never want you to leave. Ever.”

Felicity already opened her mouth to say something back when she realized that there could be more behind his words than she had thought at first. She bit down on her bottom lip, watching him closely.

“Laurel told you that…”

“…you thought I asked my mother to do this?” Oliver asked. “Yes.”

Felicity lowered her gaze, feeling tears springing to her eyes.

“Felicity, I know I haven’t been in from the beginning,” Oliver whispered. “I left you alone, and I get that it takes time to earn that trust back. I just… You need to tell me what I can do because I am stretched to my limits. I don’t know what else I can do to make you know that I am here for you and our daughter and I am not planning on leaving either of you. I just-“

“It’s not your fault. Since the moment you told me that you are all in, you have been all in. You’ve actually been kind of perfect,” Felicity interrupted him. Taking in a sniffling breath, she lifted her gaze to look at him. “I was… I am… I don’t know. I just needed time to rethink things.”

“About us?”

“More about the baby,” Felicity replied.

Oliver tensed at her words, and Felicity didn’t miss how his breath seemed to get caught in his throat. His grip on her hands tightened slightly.

“I…” Felicity started, clearing her throat.

When a single tear ran down her cheek, Oliver quickly wiped it away. He tugged a few strands of her hair behind her ear before he lowered his hand back to her hand that seemed to be waiting for his fingers to link back with hers. He didn’t say anything and instead just waited for her to be ready to tell him what the results her thoughts had produced.

“The circumstances that led us here have been messy,” Felicity explained after awhile. “Everything is messy. It has been, and it still is. And I…”

Oliver waited for her to say something more, and only when she didn’t he asked, “You… are reconsidering giving her away?”

“Yes,” Felicity replied, but as soon as she had said it, she closed her eyes. “No… I don’t know.”

She took in a few deep breaths, closing her eyes. Oliver didn’t say anything, obviously waiting for her to continue.

Felicity had tears in her eyes when she finally looked at him again through tears. She took in a sniffling breath, asking, “Is it wrong that I love her?”

Oliver frowned. “Why would it-“

“Given the messy situation that created her and surround us now, do you think that I am allowed to love her?” Felicity asked with small voice. “Because I do. I do love her, but I don’t know if I am allowed to. I want to raise her because I love her so much, but what if that’s just selfish? What if other parents could give her more because they are older and more experienced and god knows what else and would still love her the same? What if-“

Oliver interrupted her with a firm kiss to her lips. He let go of her hands for a moment, so he could pull her closer against him. When their fingers linked back on the bump, Oliver leaned back a little.

“Of course it is okay to love her. We are her parents. We are supposed to love her.”

“So you still think raising her is the right decision?”

“Yes,” Oliver replied firmly. “I still think so. If you have any doubts, though, we should-“

“No,” Felicity interrupted him quickly, shaking her head. “No, I don’t… I was just…”

“Felicity, I want you to have everything you want in life. I know you aim high, and I don’t think you should step back from that. If you feel raising this baby would-“

“No,” Felicity interrupted him once more, more firmly this time. “Your mother’s words just upset me.”

“I’m sorry for that.”

“It’s not your fault,” Felicity stated, squeezing his fingers. “Sorry for having doubts, even if it has been only for the split of a second.”

Oliver shook his head. “Don’t worry about that.”

“I was going to call you right before she came here by the way,” Felicity told him. “I know it doesn’t make up for the week I left you in the dark, but-“

“It’s okay,” Oliver only said. “Let’s not talk about that anymore. Monday you will go back to school, and everything will be alright.”

Felicity frowned. “Alright? In school? Did you miss that I am a pregnant teenager?”

“A pregnant teenager with a boyfriend who has influential friends and broke somebody’s nose,” Oliver added with a grin. “Trust me, there wasn’t one rumor heard last week.”

“Wow.”

“I told you it was a mistake to keep our relationship a secret,” Oliver replied and kissed the tip of her nose. “Everything will be alright.”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip. “What about your mother?”

“I will take care of that,” he promised.

“Oliver,” Felicity said in a warning tone.

“Don’t worry about it. I will not break her nose,” Oliver said with a wink.

Against her will Felicity released a low chuckle. “You are terrible.”

“You love it.”

Felicity looked at Oliver’s happy face for a long moment, wondering why she always made the same mistake of pushing him away. Well, maybe she knew the reason. She probably did. Yet, she never seemed to learn from it.

“I love you, you know that?” she asked him.

Oliver smiled, leaning in and brushing his lips against hers.

“I know,” he whispered against her lips. “I love you, too.”

He brushed his lips against hers once more before he lowered his head and pressed his lips to the top of her belly.

“And you,” he whispered quietly. “I love you too.”

Felicity smiled, not even needing to take a look around to make sure nobody was watching them. The Aquarium was always deserted at this time of a day. Luckily, because it allowed the three of them to share this moment!

“You know, I just realized something,” Oliver said when he straightened back up to look at her.

Felicity perked up her eyebrow in question. “And that is?”

“We really need to find a name for her.”

“It’s still thirteen weeks until she is born,” Felicity replied.

“Thirteen weeks will pass so much more quickly than we think,” Oliver replied. “And I would just like to have a name for her. If you’re ready for that.”

Felicity smiled. “I guess you’re right. She should have a name.”

Oliver smiled and pulled his phone from the pocket of his jeans. “I’ll try to find something on the web.”

Before he had even been able to open the browser, though, Felicity had taken his phone from him. When he looked at her, she saw her smiling teasingly.

“I love you, but we want to find a name before she is born, don’t we?”

 

 

The door hadn’t even fallen shut behind him when his mother already stepped into the entrance hall. She looked at him with a frown and puckered lips.

“Oliver,” she said with slightly reproachful voice. ”Where have you been? The school called us and said you didn’t go to your last class. You can’t just miss school. Principal Harris kept you in school despite the fact that you acted out yesterday. You can’t afford to strike with more bad behavior.”

“You want to lecture me about bad behavior?” Oliver asked, crossing his arms in front of his chest and looking at his mother angrily. “That’s a little hypocritical, isn’t it?”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“Oh, it is supposed to mean that I wouldn’t call talking to my pregnant girlfriend and offering her a lot of money for leaving me and telling me the baby isn’t mine a decent behavior, either.”

Oliver watched his mother’s face falling. Her eyed widened slightly, and she pressed her lips together firmly as she took in a deep breath through her nose. It only took her a few seconds until she got her facial expression back under control, though.

“I was just-“

“No,” Oliver interrupted her immediately, stepping a little closer. “You don’t get to defend what you did. Felicity spend one week, not talking to me and seriously considering giving our daughter up for adoption after all.”

Oliver had trouble to keep his voice firm. It threatened to break away at his last words. He knew that if they should ever realize that they weren’t good parents, they would have to consider giving their daughter away. Right now the thought of not seeing his baby girl growing up just pained him too much, though.

“Oliver, I-“

“No,” Oliver interrupted her immediately again.

From the corner of his eye he saw his father stepping into the doorframe to the living room, leaning against the wood. With his arms crossed in front of his chest, he watched his wife and son and listened to their dispute.

“Felicity and I love each other,” Oliver explained, “and we love our daughter. We spent the last hours trying to find a name for her. We are serious about this. We want to raise her together. You don’t get to decide that it’s better for me or my daughter if I am not included in her life.”

How could she even think that it was better for his baby girl if she never met him? Felicity had grown up without her dad most of her life because he had left, and she still suffered from it from time to time. To be abandoned by parents left scars that probably never truly healed. And his daughter would have probably felt abandoned, too.

“You have two options now,” Oliver explained, tightening his hands to fists next to his hips. “Either you accept that Felicity and I love each other and that we decided to raise this baby together, or you are out of my life. I am sure I can find a different place to stay. I don’t want to stay under a roof with a person who tries to take the two most important people in my life away from me.”

Moira looked at him for a long moment, obviously considering what she should say now. For a long moment everything was quiet, and Oliver was almost sure she would either tell him to get his things packed and leave or laugh it off as a bagatelle. Instead of saying anything, she turned her head to where Robert was still leaning in the frame of the door with his arms crossed in front of his chest.

“Robert,” Moira said to her husband, “would you please say something about this?”

Robert looked at his wife for a long moment before he turned his gaze to his son. Oliver frowned slightly, and for the split of a second he wondered if his father’s words of support a few days before had been less genuine than he had thought they had been. Maybe his father had just tried to play him for whatever reason. Or maybe he had changed his mind, now that Moira didn’t seem to come around as easily as they had both thought.

Oliver held his breath, waiting for his father to speak. Robert turned his head back towards Moira under his son’s and wife’s gazes.

“If someone tried to take you and our kids away from me, I’d do the same,” he stated, shrugging his shoulders. “I am not happy that Oliver is becoming a father at this young age, but he is becoming a father, and he wants to take the responsibility for his child. I am not going to stop him from that, and neither should you.”

Oliver smiled. So his father’s supports had been genuine. He really supported his decision to take the responsibility instead of running away from it. Well, his father had hoped for him to grow up a little more for quite some time now. Of course he supported this since obviously Oliver was growing up with this situation to handle.

“So what now?” Moira asked.

“Now I will go upstairs and take a shower and then head to bed,” Oliver explained. “Tomorrow you will apologize to Felicity and take back whatever you said to her that made her doubt that we can raise this baby together. Since an apology isn’t enough, you will have to figure out what else there is that you can do to make up for your offer to Felicity.”

“And how do you-“

“I don’t know what there is that could possibly be enough to make up for this,” Oliver interrupted her irritably. He was tired since he hadn’t caught much sleep last week. All he wanted to do was to take a shower, lie down in bed and call Felicity, so they could fall asleep together while talking on the phone. “I am not even sure that there is anything that can make up for this. I might be able to give you a second chance because you are my mother and you’ve always been there for me when I needed you. I am not sure Felicity will be able to do the same, though. There might be a chance that your offer got you kicked out of your granddaughter’s life before she has even been born. Congratulations and night.”

Not turning back around or waiting for his mother to say anything, Oliver walked upstairs and headed towards his room. He didn’t want to talk to her any longer. The fact that he gave her a second chance didn’t mean that he had forgiven her already. Actually Oliver was sure that it would take quite some time until he could look at his mother without feeling angry.

He had already reached the first landing when he heard his mother asking her husband, “Why are you smiling like that?”

“Have you ever seen him fight for something the way he fights for Felicity and their baby?” Robert asked back, and Oliver didn’t need to look at his father to know that he was smiling. “I didn’t even know that he could be that passionate about something that would consider any responsibility.”

“Aren’t you worried what will happen once the two of them get into a fight?” Moira asked back. “Or when they discover that raising a baby is about more than picking a cute name?”

“They are young. They need to gain their own experiences,” Robert replied. “And if Oliver continued to fight for this relationship and the baby the way he does right now, I don’t see any real reason to worry.”

Moira sighed. “I just hope that you are right.”


	10. Chapter 10

Oliver’s touch felt like a gush of wind against her naked back. The tips of his fingers barely touched her at all while they were moving slowly from right above her butt upwards along her spine. Once they had reached her neck, they played with her hair for a few seconds and then slowly moved back down. Sighing, Felicity snuggled her face closer to the side of his neck and put her right leg between both of his, so she was almost lying on top of him.

“I like this,” Felicity whispered.

“Me too.” Oliver pressed a kiss to her temple. “Perfect prom night.”

“And we didn’t even go to prom,” Felicity replied with a low chuckle, but it soon ended in another sigh when the tips of his fingers moved over that one spot on her lower back that had been terribly sore these last weeks. It was like the touch of his skin against hers had a magic effect on her, though. She felt better with the brush of his fingertips against her skin immediately.

“Hey!” Oliver complained, pinching her into her side teasingly. “You wore a fancy dress. I wore a tux including suspenders. And-“

“I love the suspenders,” Felicity whispered between his words, stroking her hands over his naked chest where the suspenders had been.

“-we danced,” Oliver continued. “I think that is all it takes for a prom.”

“You might be right.” Felicity smiled against his neck before she put her chin on his shoulder to look at him. She just eyed up his face, watching him stare at the ceiling, without saying a word. He looked happy and at peace. A gentle smile was playing on his lips. “Are you sure you don’t want to go to prom? All your friends are there and-“

“The only one that really matters to me is you,” Oliver explained, turning his head to look at her. “And you’re here.”

“I just don’t want you to regret not going. You only graduate high school once.”

“That might be true,” Oliver replied. He pressed a lingering kiss to her forehead before he continued, “We don’t have the place all to ourselves much more often, though. And I don’t think I want to get up anytime soon.”

“I don’t want you to get up either,” Felicity replied.

She smiled at him for a long moment before she kissed his chest quickly and then rested her head back on his shoulder. Her hand started drawing patterns on his naked chest while Oliver’s fingers resumed their path up and down Felicity’s spine.

Oliver was right about making use of having the place to them for once. Laurel and Sara were at the prom, and Donna and Quentin had gone out for dinner to celebrate their anniversary. Hence, Felicity had been the only one home when Oliver had arrived with a box of things to decorate her room with and a maternity prom dress for her to wear. While she had put on the dress, he had prepared her room for a perfectly romantic prom. They had eaten what Raisa had cooked for them, danced to the slow music Oliver had brought and eventually started undressing each other. They had really put the night to good use.

Since they had found out about the pregnancy, they hadn’t had any sex. It had been a really long time, but the situation had been so new and scary and there had always been new obstacles as it had seemed. And then Felicity hadn’t had any desire for sex either. Though she had been spared from most of the terrible side effect of pregnancy, the hormones had still been messing with her quite a bit, so she hadn’t felt sexy enough to undress in front of Oliver.

It had been a terrible feeling. Sex had always been something that had linked them to each other. They hadn’t started their relationship with sex, but it had definitely been a factor. They had liked having sex whenever and wherever they had met. Once they had started, they had explored what they liked a lot. It had been fun, and it had brought them closer. So not having sex for so long hadn’t been much fun.

A lot of things had changed during the last weeks, though, and Felicity felt her desire to have sex again now was a result of that. From the moment she had come to school and Oliver had been waiting there for her the first time everything had been so much easier. Ignoring the gazes of everyone who had been watching them intensely, Oliver had taken her school bag and books and walked her to her first class. For a day everyone had been staring and talking, but it had seemed like it had quickly turned into snow of yesteryear. Oliver’s angry gazes in the gossip people’s direction had probably been part of the reason for that.

“Is there anything that could make this evening be more perfect than it already is?” Oliver asked, interrupting Felicity’s thoughts.

Felicity turned her head, resting her chin on Oliver’s shoulder to look at him again. She hummed and tapped her fingers on Oliver’s chest, trying to figure out an honest answer. Oliver’s hand stopped its path up and down her spine. He rested it against her lower back and gently massaged the sore muscles there.

“I can only think of two things,” Felicity stated.

“Two?” Oliver asked. “Wow, it seems like I have failed this prom.”

Felicity chuckled at how serious he had managed to say those words, and she rubbed her hand over his abs comfortingly.

“You did really great,” she told him. “There are just two little details that would be the icing on the cake.”

“Shoot,” Oliver prompted.

“Hm… I would have liked to find a name for the baby,” Felicity started, rubbing one hand over her bump. “She has been without one for so long now. And I would have liked to paint my toenails, but the bump is in the way.”

Oliver didn’t hesitate long. He slid to the side carefully, making Felicity’s head fall off his shoulder and to the pillow. He gently pushed her leg away from between his and slid away from under the blanket. Frowning, Felicity watched him climbing out of bed and putting on his boxer briefs before he turned around to her with his hands in his hips.

“Where do you keep your nail polish?”

“On the small shelve next to the wardrobe,” Felicity answered, “but what are you-“

“In the box right next to you on the floor are the decorations I couldn’t put to use, and underneath those you will find a book of baby names.”

“You brought a book of baby names?”

“I bought it and brought it,” Oliver said with a wink towards her. “Do I get to choose the nail polish I will get to apply on your toenails?”

“You want to paint my toenails?”

“Hey, if you can’t do it, I have to,” Oliver replied. “So do you prefer a certain color, or can I just pick what I like?”

“Just pick what you like,” Felicity told him.

She rolled over and rummaged in the box Oliver had brought until she found the book with the names. While Oliver was coming back to the bed, Felicity sat up against the headboard, eying up the cover of the book. Oliver sat down at the end of the bed, lifting the blanket until he found one of her feet and pulled it into his lap.

“I chose  _It’s a girl_ ,” Oliver told her, holding up the bottle of nail polish she had only bought recently. “I felt like the name was speaking to me.”

“I felt the same way when I bought it last week,” Felicity told him. “So you will color my toenails, and I will try to find a name?”

“Team work, baby,” he replied with a wink.

Felicity kicked her foot against his chest lightly, barely able to hide her smile. She leaned back against the headboard again, eying Oliver up over the edge of her book.

“Oh, it’s sorted by topics,” Felicity said in surprise when she saw the index. Hm… Let’s start with…”

She opened the page of literary baby names, looking over a few pages and names quickly. She had tried to figure out if she wanted a classic or a modern baby name, but Felicity felt like there was no name she really liked. At least she hadn’t found it yet.

“Are you going to share any of the names with me?” Oliver asked after awhile.

“Oh, sure,” Felicity replied quickly. “Sorry. I thought the names would just babble out of me like they usually do, but apparently not.”

“Apparently not,” Oliver repeated with a nod of his head.

Lifting the book in front of her face, Felicity went back to the first page of literary baby names.

“First one is Lyla, but I can already say that we can’t choose this one because we have a friend called Lyla. She’s living in Boston with her husband and child. You will have to meet them one day. They are great,” Felicity told him. “I am just not into naming babies after family or friends. It’s weird.”

“So no Lyla then,” Oliver replied.

Felicity glanced over the edge of the book, seeing Oliver focused on the task at hands. Slowly she lowered her gaze back to the book with a smile.

“Next one is Zora.”

“A strong name,” Oliver commented.

“I hate it,” she just replied, shaking her head and checking the next. “Arya.”

“And that’s supposed to be a name?” Oliver asked with doubt in his voice. “I don’t think I would ever agree to that one. Next.”

“Scarlett.”

“That one sounds agreeable.”

“Are you kidding? Have you ever read or watched  _Gone with the wind_? Scarlett O’Hara is a spoiled girl. Big no to that name,” she explained. “Eleonore.”

“Sounds too old.”

“Lucetta.”

“Lucetta?”

“Yes, she a character in a novel by Thomas Hardy,” she explained. She bit down on her bottom lip, closing the book and putting it aside.

“Done talking baby names already?” Oliver asked, resting her right foot on the mattress and grabbing her left one to continue coloring her nails.

“Speaking of Thomas Hardy… I was just… wondering if you have heard anything from Tommy lately,” Felicity asked.

“No,” Oliver replied, shrugging his shoulders.

Felicity cocked her head. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“No,” Oliver replied again and sighed. “There’s nothing to talk about this. He’s the one who decided he’s out, Felicity. I guess he just doesn’t know how to deal with a friend who’s becoming a father.”

“I guess he probably thinks it’s a mistake.”

“But it’s not,” Oliver said, lifting his gaze from her toes and looking at her. “And if she is a mistake, then she is the best mistake I ever made.”

Pulling the blanket aside, he leaned forward until his lips were hovering right above the bump. He pressed his lips to her naked skin and whispered, “Hear that? You are the best mistake I ever made. I love you.”

Felicity stroked her and over the back of Oliver’s head, enjoying the feeling of his lips on her. The baby didn’t react much. She had probably fallen asleep in the last minutes because she had been very awake when her parents had had some fun.

“If Tommy can’t accept her,” Oliver explained, covering Felicity with the blanket again, “then I can’t respect him.”

“Well, it’s not easy to accept that your best friend is becoming a father so early, I guess,” Felicity said.

“If he was a real friend, he would at least try,” Oliver replied.

His voice was determined, leaving no doubt that he didn’t want to talk about this anymore. So Felicity leaned her head back against the headboard of the bed and closed her eyes for a moment.

She hadn’t thought that Tommy would react like this. His protecting behavior before the reveal of the baby’s father had actually made her believe that he would respect and accept the decision she and Oliver had made quite soon. She knew he had been disappointed that Oliver hadn’t told him about it, though.

Felicity glanced at Oliver, who was focused on painting her last toenail again, and made a mental note to go and talk to Tommy soon. If Oliver’s falsely assumed dishonesty was the reason he didn’t talk to him anymore, she would make sure that Tommy understood that she had urged Oliver to keep it a secret. Oliver shouldn’t lose his best friend because of a decision she had made.

Felicity closed her eyes with a low yawn. She was tired. Being pregnant wasn’t exactly leaving much energy, and the little energy she had had left after this day had been used up during sex. Slow, gentle, great,  – Felicity yawned once more – amazing sex.

“Are you tired?” Oliver asked, putting the nail polish away. He crawled up the bed to lie down next to her and pushed one arm under her head.

“A little,” Felicity replied, yawning once more. “I just don’t want to sleep yet.”

 “I am looking forward to when our daughter will say that,” Oliver said with a chuckle. He made a long pause before he continued, “We didn’t get around to talk about the brunch you had this morning by the way.”

Felicity didn’t miss how Oliver failed to sound casually though he seemed to really try. She took Oliver’s hand on her shoulder and linked their fingers. When she turned around onto her side, making sure her toenails wouldn’t get in contact with the sheet, she looked at Oliver closely.

She knew that his relationship to his mother had been seriously damaged by the money Moira had offered her. Their relationship was far from getting back to normal. It had only made him even more protective of Felicity and the baby. Whenever his mother was around, he was always keeping an eye on her, and he had again and again repeated that nothing she could do would ever be enough to completely make up for what she had done.

Felicity was trying to do her best, so Oliver’s anger about his mother wouldn’t increase. She didn’t want to make the situation worse than it already was, and Moira was obviously trying to sincerely make up for what she had done. So in the last weeks since Moira had made her offer, Felicity had just been trying to forgive Moira by accepting her apologies and her suggestions of getting to know each other. She didn’t think she would ever be able to forget what Moira had done, and there would probably stay a doubt about her forever, but… She would just try to get along with her.

This morning they had had brunch together. Moira had suggested spending some time together, so they could really get to know each other, and although Felicity hadn’t really been looking forward to it, she had agreed. She had just forced Laurel to go with her because spending time alone with Moira was not something she could imagine doing anytime soon. They hadn’t been alone, though, because apart from Laurel Thea had been there, too.

“It was good,” Felicity replied. “Your mom seems like a nice person.”

“She is when she is not offering you money to disappear from my life,” Oliver replied bitterly.

“Well, she’s a mother, and she thought she was only doing what was best for you. I… It was wrong, very wrong actually. She didn’t do it to hurt you, though, and I think that is important to remember. Who knows what I will do to protect the baby when she’s born?”

“I guess we both don’t know how we will be once we are parents,” Oliver said. “I just hope that we will never have to go as far as offering someone money to disappear from our daughter’s life. It would be horrible if we did something like that.”

“I guess that means hoping we won’t set the wrong example for the baby and become grandparents at 36?”

“Oh God,” Oliver said. “Don’t make me think about that.”

Felicity chuckled. “No, honestly. Maybe with a little more time I might be able to see a time far in the future when I could actually like your mother. At least as little bit. So it’s still going to be a long time until I will be able to like her, but I am getting closer to seeing myself liking her in the future.”

Oliver just nodded, not saying a word. She knew that he didn’t really want to talk about this. All he had wanted was making sure that the brunch hadn’t ended in a disaster. Felicity didn’t want to destroy the mood by talking more about his mother, so she decided to just drop the subject.

“Your sister seems very excited about being an aunt,” Felicity stated. “She handed me a list of all the names she would like for the baby.”

“Oh, I saw that list,” Oliver said. “Please tell me we are not taking any of them.”

Felicity chuckled. “I promised your sister that we will consider them, but we won’t. Not really.”

“Poor Thea.”

“Your mother let her buy dozens of baby clothes to make up for the disappointment that I didn’t choose a name of her list immediately,” Felicity explained.

“You went shopping for baby clothes together?”

“Yes, we were walking past a baby boutique on our way to the car, and Thea convinced us to go in. She bought a few baby clothes,” Felicity explained. “I preferred to just take in all those impressions of the store. The first real shopping I want to do with you.”

“I am glad to hear that,” Oliver whispered. He pressed a kiss to her forehead and put a hand to the bump, stroking it gently. “We still need to buy like everything.”

“We do,” Felicity said with a sigh, nodding her head. “And… we… uhm… I think there is something we need to talk about.”

Oliver turned around onto his side completely, so he could look at her more closely. Felicity did the same, still making sure she wouldn’t destroy the nail polish Oliver had applied to her toes carefully. She pressed her lips to his bicep quickly before she looked at him again.

“Your mom wanted to buy a nursery for the mansion,” Felicity explained slowly, “and that made me realize that we didn’t really talk about living arrangements. I mean… don’t get me wrong, but I don’t think I want to move into the mansion. I actually talked to my mom about staying here until… I don’t know… until I know what’s next?”

Oliver looked at her for a long moment, and Felicity already felt like she should say something more when Oliver started rubbing his hand over the bump and replied, “Well, I would love to have the two of you close, but I also understand that you want to stay here because it’s your home. I just… hope that your parents will let me visit you more often then. Maybe they could even let me stay a night every now and then, so I could… I don’t know… help if she cries in the middle of the night.”

“That sounds great,” Felicity whispered with a gentle smile. “I am not sure my parents will allow you to be here more often, but I would like to try convincing them to let you stay here as long as you want to before we think about anything else. I just think that raising a baby is hard as it is and without the support of my parents it would only be worse.”

Oliver nodded. “I agree. We should definitely try to convince them before we do anything else.”

Felicity snuggled closer to Oliver, resting her head on his shoulder. She suddenly felt even more tired than she had been before. And she didn’t think she could keep her eyes open much longer. They were already burning with the need to close.

“Your mother could still furnish a nursery in the mansion, though,” Felicity added in a mumble. “I think I can convince my parents that I can stay a night at your place every now and then. Well, and if they don’t accept you, we will need a place to stay anyway.”

Oliver nodded. Staring at the ceiling, he moved his hands through Felicity’s hair, combing it with his fingers and massing her scalp gently. He could feel Felicity’s breathing evening out against the side of his neck as she was drifting off into sleep. He closed his eyes, enjoying the feeling of having her pressed against his side. He was tired, but he knew that he couldn’t allow himself to fall asleep because if her parents caught them here, he would most likely never get permission to come here again.

He just had to sneak out before her parents would be back.

“Don’t go,” Felicity mumbled in her sleep like she had heard him thinking. “Don’t ever leave.”

“Don’t worry,” he whispered and pressed his lips to the crown of her head comfortingly. “I will never leave you.“

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So next week there really won’t be an update now because I will go on vacation for a week. I need to relax a little before I come back to destroy everyone’s happyinees. Next update hopefully in two weeks then. ;)


	11. Chapter 11

„What do you think about this one? “

Felicity crossed her arms in front of her chest and took in the nursery set her mother had led them to. Pink walls and a white, fluffy carpet were chosen in perfect harmony with the pieces of furniture in the same colors. Golden princess crowns were drawn to some of the wood elements in the room set and some pink bows decorated the cushioned elements. It was the most clichéd trash Felicity had ever seen, and she knew a lot about clichés and kitsch given who her mother was.

“I don’t know,” Felicity said slowly, insecure of how to tell her mother that she really didn’t see herself buying a room like this. “I think it’s a little too… girly.”

“Well, you are having a girl, hon,” Donna replied, “so it makes sense for the room to be a girly one, right?”

“Well, maybe not  _that_  girly.”

Felicity took a look around, trying to find Oliver in the crowd of people. They had separated when Thea had urged him to let her show him the giant spectrum of stuffed animals the store offered. Felicity had wanted to follow them, but before she could have done that, Donna and Moira had already led her towards the nurseries.

Felicity was still surprised that her mother had actually agreed to Moira’s offer of going shopping together. Her parents still hadn’t forgiven Oliver for knocking up their daughter and hence hadn’t met him again since the afternoon in Principal Harris’ office weeks ago. When Moira had suggested the shopping tour, Donna had gladly agreed, though. She had started to get slightly excited about her first grandchild in the last weeks and even started accepting Oliver more. He had even been allowed to visit her at home a few times now.

Given the still messy and tense situation the day had been surprisingly pleasant so far. After they had had breakfast together, they had come here to the store. They had already picked some small, basic stuff they needed for when the baby was born like bottles and car seats and clothes and whatever else Donna and Moira had explained they needed. Now they were getting closer to the highlight of the day – buying the nursery. They would have to buy two nurseries, just like they had had to buy everything else twice, so Felicity and Oliver would both be perfectly prepared for when the baby was born.

Only five more weeks to go, Felicity thought. She stroked her hand over the bump, feeling her daughter kick against her hand in response. The closer the day of the birth came, the more the fear increased. Raising a baby would be a challenge, a tough challenge actually. Felicity was still not sure if she was really ready for that, but she just hoped that she would grow into what it took to be a good mother.

“Oh, this one looks nice,” she heard Moira say, pulling her out of her thoughts.

Felicity strolled to where Moira was standing at the next nursery set. It was a simpler one. Unlike the one Donna had suggested, the furniture in this nursery were made of natural wood. They had little details, but no big decorations. There was a beautiful rocking chair that Felicity knew she would love to use because it reminded her of the one her grandma had had on her front porch.

“I love this one,” Felicity replied. “This is what I was looking for.”

“Are you sure, hon?” Donna asked, “Because the pink one really is so much more feminine.”

“I know,” Felicity replied, looking around in the room to take in every detail. “But I love this one.”

She could see the furniture in the guest room that they would use as a nursery. The diaper changing unit would be placed right next to the door with the crib beside it. That way the rocking chair could be placed in front of the window, so Felicity could look outside in the garden when she fed the baby. She would paint the walls turquoise or rather ask Quentin to do it for her since the idea of getting on a ladder to paint walls was ridiculous even if she wasn’t pregnant. Maybe she would even find a pretty wallpaper border with fishes. The aquarium always managed to make her feel safe and calm her down, so maybe it would do the same for the baby.

Smiling, she stroked her hand over her bump. “I think this might be your nursery.”

“This one? Really?”

Felicity turned around, seeing Oliver approaching them. He had one hand behind his back, obviously keeping something from her.

“What are you holding behind your back?” she asked suspiciously, perking up an eyebrow. She tried to cross her arms in front of her chest, but the bump was in the way, so instead she just rested her hands on top of it, never taking her eyes off Oliver.

“Nothing,” Oliver replied innocently, but his grin betrayed him. “Just a little surprise.”

“I think I had enough surprises lately.”

Chuckling, Oliver leaned forward and pressed a kiss to the tip of her nose. “You will like this one. I promise.”

“You will love it,” Thea promised with an excited nod of her head.

Felicity grumbled something that luckily nobody understood. She turned back around to look at the nursery once more and answered the question Oliver had asked before. “Yes, I am really sure it should be this one.”

“What about the one next to this?” he asked, pointing his finger back at the nursery Donna had liked so much. “It’s pink. I like that.”

“Ha!” Donna made, stepping next to Oliver and slapping his chest with her bag lightly. “Hear that, Felicity? This boy really has a sense for style.”

Felicity rolled her eyes, not missing Oliver’s proud smile. She knew how much he wanted to please her parents. The better his relationship with Donna would be, the higher his chances of getting the opportunity to visit Felicity and the baby at her parents’ home more often than he was allowed over now.

“So I guess we will take this nursery, and you will take the pink one?” Felicity asked.

She leaned her back against his chest with a sigh, feeling his warm skin under his shirt warming her aching lower back. Sighing once more, she rested her head on Oliver’s shoulder and looked up at him.

“I guess that’s what we will do.”

“I will come and visit the pink nursery every now and then,” Donna said with a sigh.

“Oh, you and your husband should definitely come and visit us,” Moira suggested, linking arms with Donna. “You know, now that our kids are building a family together, we should take the time and get to know each other.”

“I would love that,” Donna replied.

The two women slowly walked away. Thea followed them, leaving Oliver and Felicity alone.

“Our mothers are getting along,” Felicity said slowly.

“Looks like the baby fever finally arrived for them and makes them forget the slightly messy story that brought us here,” Oliver replied, looking at where their mother’s had disappeared in the crowd of other people. “Am I the only one slightly scared by that?”

“No,” Felicity replied. She straightened up and turned around to Oliver, scrunching her nose. “It’s a little… creepy.”

“You didn’t tell your mother about what my mother did, did you?”

“No,” Felicity replied quickly. “It would only make everything more complicated. My mother is like a mama bear. She might not have been happy about the pregnancy, but if she hears about that, she will freak out. Besides, your mother is really doing her best to make up for everything that happened.”

Oliver sighed. “I know. I still don’t trust her around you or our daughter.”

“I know,” Felicity replied. “Neither do I, but we need to make the best of the situation, right?”

She leaned against him, pressing her bump to his abs. Smiling, Oliver put his hands to the side and stroked his fingers up and down. Felicity could feel the baby move in response, trying to catch his hands by kicking against them.

“So that was the great highlight of the shopping tour?” Oliver asked, looking back at the nurseries behind her.

Felicity chuckled. “Pretty unspectacular for a highlight, right?”

“I think we had a lot of spectacles in the last months, didn’t we?”

“Oliver, we didn’t have spectacles, we were one,” Felicity explained. “We still are actually.”

Chuckling, Oliver pressed a kiss to the tip of her nose once more before he pulled Felicity closer and kissed her lips gently. Felicity sighed into the kiss, leaning against Oliver. As great as the day had been, it had also been exhausting. Being on her feet for too long really wasn’t helping the ache in her back at all, and-

Felicity tensed when she heard a suspicious clicking somewhere close to her. When Oliver broke the kiss, she turned her head, seeing her suspicion confirmed. Only a couple of feet away from them stood a reporter, taking photos of them. Quickly Oliver pushed Felicity behind him, shielding her with his body.

“Damn it!” he cursed.

Felicity watched him clench his hands to fists. He was already about to take a step towards the reporter and probably talk to him in a not-so-polite way when Moira hurried towards them.

“Oliver, take Felicity to the back entrance,” she told her son urgently. “Donna and Thea will be waiting in the car already.”

Oliver hesitated for a moment. Felicity could see that his eyes were focused on the reporter dangerously. She knew that he had had some encounters with paparazzi, and they hadn’t ended well. If the expression in his eyes was any indication, this one wouldn’t end well either. So it was probably better to follow Moira’s suggestion and leave.

“Oliver, come on,” Felicity whispered. She put a hand to his back, feeling his tense muscles relax under her touch slightly. “Let’s go.”

It only took a heartbeat longer before Oliver turned around. He quickly kissed her temple before grabbing her hand and leading her to the back entrance. Felicity didn’t miss that he kept shielding her from the reporter who was still taking photos.

So the cat was out of the bag, Felicity thought with an uncomfortable pain in her stomach. It had been bound to happen one day. The Queens were quite popular here after all. It was actually kind of a miracle that it had taken so long!

 

 

_…in what seemed like a moment of domestic bliss. The contrast between party boy Ollie Queen and Felicity Smoak, who is said to be a straight A student, is obvious. While some might start to look for even one reason why Smoak might have started a relationship with Queen, we are sure there can be found billions on the Queen Family’s bank account. A smart brain still needs a lot more effort to get you through life than letting nannies raise a billionaire’s mailman’s child. Additionally,…_

“You shouldn’t watch this,” Oliver whispered, leaning over the backrest of the couch. He bent his head and pressed a kiss to the crown of Felicity’s head. “It’s all crap anyway.”

“They think I am a gold digger.”

“Who cares?” Oliver asked, shrugging his shoulders. When Felicity frowned at him and shot him an angry glare, he added calmingly, “We both know it’s not true, and that is all that matters. They want a big story, and for them that means creating drama where there is none.”

“I still don’t like it,” Felicity replied, looking back at the screen of her TV.

She and Oliver had gone to her home immediately, hoping to have more privacy here. Luckily, they did. Some reporters seemed to be in front of the Queen’s mansion, but nobody had come here. And since Donna had left for work, it was only the two of them in the house now. Well, the two of them and those ugly reports on the TV.

“They make it sound like I got knocked up by whosoever and am now trying to make you commit yourself to me and the baby, so I get access to your family’s money. Sounds like I am using the baby to-”

“I know you aren’t,” Oliver interrupted her in a gentle tone.

He put his hands to her shoulders and massaged the tight knots there. Felicity sighed, closing her eyes. She rested her head back on the headrest of the couch, and smiled softly when she felt Oliver’s lips pressing against her forehead once more.

She had listened to those reports for almost an hour now, and she hadn’t heard one positive word. Everything was about how Oliver was bound to have a baby at young age given his history with clubs and alcohol, but how surprising the baby’s mother had turned out. Right after that the mentions of how she was using the baby to get access to the Queen’s money started.

If she really had any interest in the money, she could have just accepted the check Moira had offered her. Of course they didn’t know about the check, though, and hence-

“Stop thinking about it,” Oliver whispered. He pressed his lips against her forehead once more, and when she opened her eyes, she found him leaning over her face and smiling at her gently. “They will drop the topic soon, anyway. We won’t give them anything more than what they got, so they will soon get bored and find something new to make up stories about.”

“How did they even know about it suddenly?”

“I guess somebody talked after all,” Oliver replied. “We knew it was going to happen one day. It’s a good thing we even made it that far without them knowing.”

“Do you think Max Fuller had something to do with it?”

Oliver sighed. “I wouldn’t be surprised to be honest.”

“But why did he wait so long?”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders and moved the tips of his fingers over the soft skin of her cheeks. “There is no need to think about that anymore. The news is out, and now we just have to sit through this gossip trash.”

“Yeah…” Felicity said with a sigh.

“Don’t worry. It won’t take too long,” Oliver promised. “And I will do my best to distract you from whatever they’ll say.”

Felicity looked back at the TV, following the report about her and Oliver. Obviously the world of the rich and famous weren’t offering many good stories right now, or why had this show been talking about her and Oliver for the last thirty minutes now? They always repeated the same stuff and suggestions, emphasizing how much money the Queens owned.

_…also interesting regards living arrangements. While the Queens as well as Smoak’s mother and stepfather live in Starling City, we are not sure that Ollie and his girlfriend will stay and raise the child here. According to insider information from school Smoak applied and is even accepted for a college place at MIT, so maybe the Queen son will move to Boston soon. How that will affect his position in the family and…_

Oliver snorted, making Felicity open her eyes once again. He looked at the TV, shaking his head about what he had seen and heard.

“See?” he asked. “That is why those gossip shows always fail to make people believe that they are saying the truth for long. It’s because they are making all of this up, and it is so obvious.”

Felicity frowned. “What do you mean?”

“Well, the whole MIT-thing,” Oliver replied with another shake of his head. “The fact that the baby’s mine is a lie, too, but they would never let themselves be convinced otherwise unless it will make the better story. That whole MIT-thing is completely pointless, though. I don’t get why they even say things like that.”

Felicity’s frown deepened, and she felt a weird sting in the pit of her stomach. She bit her tongue, trying to figure out if Oliver was kidding her or what else made him believe that what the gossip reporter had just said about her being accepted to MIT was made up.

“Oliver,” she said carefully, turning around to sit up straight and look at him, “what they said is true. I did apply to MIT, and I was accepted.”

For the break of a second she was met with absolutely no reaction from Oliver. It made her heart skip a beat, knowing that whatever was about to come now would not be good. She was proved right of that when Oliver perked one eyebrow, tilting his head a little. He looked at her with unhidden anger in his eyes.

“You what?”

“Oliver, I always wanted to go to MIT,” Felicity said. “You know that.”

He did know that. She was sure that he knew that. They had had long talks about what they wanted for their future, even before the baby had linked their futures forever. He had told her that he didn’t really see himself taking his father’s position in the company ever, and she had told him that she wanted to go to MIT and maybe work for Queen Consolidated one day. It was a great company that could offer her a lot of chances. They had even discussed moving to Boston together once or twice, even if it hadn’t been serious plans they had made at that point.

“That was before you got pregnant,” Oliver replied angrily. “You said you wanted to live with your mom for awhile longer.”

“Yes, until it’s time for college.”

“Felicity, you’re pregnant.”

Felicity watched him tightening her hands to fists next to his hips, another clear sign that he was angry.

“Why would the pregnancy change anything about that?” Felicity asked. “Only a few weeks ago you told me that you wanted me to have everything I wanted. I want to go to MIT, and you knew that.”

“You’re having a baby,” Oliver replied, “our baby.”

“So?”

“So you move to Boston with our daughter, and what do I do?” Oliver asked with increasing anger in his voice. “Sit here and wait for you to come visit me once a month, so I get to see our daughter every couple for weeks for a few hours?”

Felicity took in a breath, feeling her throat tightening. “You could come with me.”

“I could come with you?” Oliver asked. He laughed dryly, shaking his head and moving his hand through his short hair. “Oh, that’s nice. Now you want me to come with you. Now that I particularly asked you about it, you’re suggesting it. What if I didn’t even apply to colleges in Boston?”

“But you did,” Felicity said hastily. “You even told me that you did.”

“That’s not the point, Felicity,” Oliver replied firmly. “The point is that you are making plans for your life and hence for our daughter’s life. And you’re doing it without me, expecting me to just follow suit. _Again_.”

“I-“

“No,” Oliver interrupted her, shaking his head. “You decided that you will go to MIT and hence take our daughter there with you. We are having a baby  _together,_ or at least I thought that we were. I don’t think I ever heard you say it’s ‘our baby’ or ‘our daughter’, and you know why that is? It’s because for you she’s not ours. She is all yours, and you don’t include me because otherwise you would have told me about  _your_  plans, so we could have worked them into  _our_ plans. We can’t raise a baby together when we’re living so far apart as we would with your college plans.”

“I’m-“ Felicity started, but she made a pause and almost expected him to interrupt her again. When he didn’t, she quickly added, “I am not even sure I will go there. It was always my dream, but you are right. It’s different now with the baby and-“

“If you didn’t want to go, you wouldn’t have applied,” Oliver interrupted her.

Felicity held her breath. She couldn’t remember any time that he had ever talked to her like this. He had always been gentle, impatient or angry sometimes for sure, but never like this.

She should have told him. She should have told him the second she got the letter, telling her she was accepted at MIT. With all the baby talk it had just never seemed to be the right place. Felicity wanted to go to MIT, but she wasn’t sure if she really would go. She couldn’t just move away with a baby. How was she going to handle raising a baby all on her own? Or the two of them together without the support of their families and friends? You couldn’t just move away like that, but then the idea had been there, and she probably should have told Oliver that the idea still existed despite the baby.

“Oliver, I’m-“

“I am so sick and tired of you always doing what  _you_  want without wasting a thought on how your choices affect me.”

“I-“

Oliver shook his head, not saying a word. The gesture was enough for Felicity to fall silent again. Her right hand moved over her bump. She could feel the baby moving beneath her fingers, probably reaction to Felicity’s uneven heartbeat. Felicity was still holding her breath, waiting for Oliver to say something more.

“It’s all about what you want. You wanted our relationship to be a secret, and I agreed because it’s what  _you_  wanted,” Oliver explained. “You still wanted it to be a secret when you got pregnant, and I agreed again. I let you keep me a secret and let you keep the pregnancy a secret, and I even let you keep it a secret that I am the baby’s father when the pregnancy was out. I agreed when you wanted to stay at your parents’ place even after the baby would be born. It was all about you, you and you. I gave you everything you wanted, waiting for you to finally let me in on our daughter’s life and realize that you can trust me because I am not ever going to leave her.”

Felicity gulped, feeling tears springing to her eyes. She lowered her gaze to her hand on the bump and took in a deep breath. She felt a stitch of guilt at his words. How many times had Oliver told her that he wasn’t going to leave her or the baby? And how many times had he agreed to something he hadn’t liked only because she had asked him for it?

“But you don’t include me. You don’t even see me as a part of your or more importantly our daughter’s life,” Oliver continued. “People only found out I am her dad by accident. I don’t get to live with her because you want to stay with your parents who have trouble liking me because they think I was the one hiding from the responsibility. And now I don’t even get to live near her, so I could come and visit her every day. Instead I can be happy when I see her maybe each other weekend because you decided that you want go to a college on the east coast.”

“I would-“

“No,” Oliver interrupted her again, obviously having enough of her excuses. “You never wanted me to be a part of her life. All you did and all you asked me to do was meant to exclude me from our daughter’s life. You wanted to do all of it by yourself. You wanted to tell your parents on your own. You wanted to endure the bullying in school by yourself. You wanted to do everything alone or at least without me.”

“That’s not true. I-“

“It is true, Felicity,” Oliver stated. “You don’t want me to be a part of your life or our daughter’s life. I am allowed to help and support you from time to time when you feel really miserable with doing all of this alone, but you are the one to make all the important decisions. You do everything the way you want and the way it seems to suit you the best without caring what I might need and want and deserve or what would be the best for our daughter. It’s all about you.”

“Oliver, I-“

“I was patient. I was patient, and I was trying to wait for you to be ready, but it’s just enough,” Oliver explained with a sigh of exhaustion. He moved his hands over his face, rubbing them over it almost violently. “We are young, and we might not be together forever. We probably won’t be given that you can’t seem to make place in your life for me. That doesn’t mean I can be left out of our baby’s life, though. She’s my daughter too, and you have to respect that I have at least some say when it comes to her.”

“Oliver, I-“

“I need some time.”

The words felt like a punch in Felicity’s face. She pulled her hand back from where it was resting on the backrest of the couch, ready to reach out for Oliver’s hand. A tear rolled over her cheek, but she quickly wiped it away.

“What… what do you mean?” she asked.

“It means that you wanted to do everything on your own, and now you can. I am not going to force myself into your life anymore. Continue your one-woman-ego-show as it pleases you. Knock yourself out with trying to do all of this by yourself until the baby is born. I’m done.”

For a long moment they just looked at each other. Felicity could see the determination in Oliver’s eyes, telling her that he was serious about this. He meant it. He was about to leave.

Felicity tried to desperately think about what she could say or do to make him know that she could change and that she  _would_  change. She would work on herself to make sure she would get better. He couldn’t just leave her alone with this. He had promised her to never leave her. He walked to the door, though, obviously about to really leave.

Oliver had already reached the door when he turned back around to her. Felicity held her breath, almost feeling hope rising in her. As soon as it had built, as quickly it was torn apart, though.

“That doesn’t mean I am out of the baby’s life, though. I am her father, and I will always be. I will call you in the next days when things have calmed down, so we can try to find a new solution for the custody with this new… situation,” Oliver explained, his voice sounding quiet and tired. “Bye, Felicity.”

He barely looked at her while saying the words. And as soon as the last syllable had fallen from his lips, he turned back around to the door and left without saying one more word. The loud sound of the door falling shut behind him made Felicity flinch.

Oliver had left, leaving her alone.

The thought made her breathing grow shorter and her hands start shaking. She tried to take in a deep breath, but her lungs refused to take in the air, and it ended in a choked sound. Again, tears were springing to her eyes, and this time she couldn’t hold them back. They streamed down her cheeks.

Oliver had left, leaving her alone. And it was all her fault. Oliver was right. She had pushed him away again and again, but she had never meant to hurt him or urge her out of her or the baby’s…  _their_  baby’s life. She had just… She hadn’t wanted to… She…

She loved Oliver. She wanted him in her life, and she wanted him in their daughter’s life. And she didn’t want to do this alone either. She didn’t even think that she could.


	12. Chapter 12

Oliver looked down at the pink stuffed octopus in his hand and felt a stitch in his heart at the thought that he had wanted to give it to Felicity as an early present to their daughter’s birth.

He had thought that every child should have that one stuffed animal that was like a best friend and constant companion. He himself had had a teddy which was a little too much of a cliché for him to get his little baby girl one, too. When he had seen the pink octopus in the store they had been in last week then, he had fallen head over heels in love with it. He and Felicity had always loved watching the octopus in the aquarium, so what better animal was there to give to his baby girl as a companion?

It had been one week since he had bought the octopus, and it had also been one week since he had seen Felicity or talked to her bump the last time.

Groaning, Oliver pressed the octopus to his chest.

He missed Felicity. He missed their baby. There was just no way he could just go back like nothing had happened. Felicity had made plans about moving to Boston without talking to him. She had planned on taking their daughter and just moving there, and she hadn’t felt the need to tell him about it like it was none of his business. She should have known that the least she should have done was tell him, so he could have made plans to move there with her.

When she had told him that she had taken steps that clearly showed that she still wanted to go there and had made it sound like he should have known that all along, he had seen red. He had been so angry, and he knew that had made him be a lot harsher than he had intended. Once the first syllables had been said, though, he hadn’t been able to stop himself. Somehow that had ended in him kind of breaking-up with Felicity which clearly wasn’t what he had wanted to do. It had just… happened.

Oliver shook his head, throwing the octopus across the room. It bounced off the wall before it landed in his sports bag.

Whenever he had been away from Felicity for this long in the last months, it had been her choice. She had secluded herself when the bullying in school had become too heavy and when his mother had offered her the money. She hadn’t come to him for help. Instead she had chosen to get through that alone and by herself. She had accepted his support when she had been completely down and he had come running after her, but she had never actively leaned on him.

The last days she had texted and called him again and again, but he hadn’t texted her back or took any of her calls. He had read the messages and listened to her voicemails to make sure that there was no emergency going on. Felicity was just trying to make contact with him, though. He knew that she was right and they needed to talk, but he wasn’t ready for that yet. He had tried to text her at least that, but he hadn’t been able to.

Oliver had no idea how they were going to make it work. He wanted to be part of their daughter’s life. He wanted to get to know her and get the chance to love her and to be part of creating a wonderful life for her. It would be difficult as long as he had no idea how to talk to Felicity, though.

And even if he was going to calm down enough to talk to her, Oliver had no idea how they were going to make this work. Sharing custody for a newborn baby was impossible. She couldn’t live one week with Felicity and the other with him. That was too much for a baby, and nothing he wanted to put his daughter through.

Besides, he didn’t want to share custody with Felicity like that. He wanted their little family back, and he wanted Felicity back. He loved her more than he had ever loved any girl before. If any of his affairs had become pregnant, he had probably sought out his way as soon as possible, but with Felicity he had wanted to work through it. He still did.

Whenever he had thought about the first days and weeks of their daughter’s life, he had seen Felicity and him taking care of her together. Despite the fact that he had been banned from Felicity’s family home and despite the other messy circumstances surrounding the start of their family he had seen the two of them doing this together.

Unlike Felicity obviously.

When there was a quiet knock at the door, Oliver groaned.

“No!” he called out, not being in the mood to see anyone. When the door opened nonetheless, he released another deep groan and stated, “I said ‘no’.”

Moira perked up an eyebrow at Oliver’s annoyed voice. She stood in the door frame with the door knob in her hand and looked at her son strictly. It only took half a second before her facial expression softened, though.

“Don’t you want to tell me what’s going on, Oliver?”

What was going on was that Felicity was making huge life plans without him like she had done for months now. She was making plans for their daughter without including him because she tried to make it as easy for herself as possible. If he wanted to be part of their daughter’s life, he had to accept her plans and somehow try to fit into them. It had been like that for months now, and he had finally enough of it. That was what was going on.

“Nothing is going on, mom. Everything is fine,” Oliver explained between gritted teeth.

“I know you too well to actually believe that,” Moira replied. She took one step into the room, closing the door behind her, before she slowly approached the bed and sat down on the edge of the mattress next to Oliver. “You haven’t seen Felicity all week.”

Oliver bit down on his tongue, biting back the harsh comment on his tongue. If this had happened a few weeks ago, his mother had probably been all too delighted about this. She had wanted to urge Felicity and the baby out of his life. She had gotten his will after all. He knew that it wouldn’t be fair, though. His mother had tried to be as supportive about his decision to raise the baby with Felicity as possible in the last weeks.

“Do you want me to call your father and ask him to come back from his business trip?” she asked. “I know he has been more supporting of the situation than I have been, so maybe you can tell him what’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong,” Oliver replied harshly.

Sighing, he dropped his head into his hands and moved his fingers through his short hair. His nails scratched over his scalp almost violently, but it was still easier to take than the pressing weight on his chest that made it hard to breathe. The weight had been burdening him since he had walked out on Felicity.

“Maybe we made the wrong decision,” Oliver suddenly heard himself whisper. He felt his stomach cramping at his own words, but he also knew that he needed to say them this one time. Otherwise they would eat him alive. “Maybe we are too young for all of this. Maybe we are too young to raise a baby together. I mean… we made that decision, but we didn’t make any real plans for later. We just thought having this baby is the right decision, and we would find a way into everything else. It was just… everything was so complicated already. We wanted to enjoy the little joy that was left and not spend that time thinking every detail of our future through. Can you understand that?”

“I do understand that,” Moira replied with a comforting smile. “Being a parent is not easy, though, and there are a lot of things that need to be a lot more thought through than without a child. It takes a lot of responsibility to raise a child.”

“Responsibility you think I don’t have,” Oliver said with a groan.

Of course his mother was trying to use this against him and try to-

“Oh, I have seen you having that responsibility,” Moira interrupted his bitter thoughts. “You stood in Mr. Harris’ office, and you told your dad and me that you and Felicity are having a baby together. You could have left her alone with that. You could have found your way out of it. Instead you showed us that you have the responsibility to take the consequences of what you did.”

Oliver nodded slowly. He had done that, and he had been proud of himself for doing so despite the consequences he had feared. Yet he had left Felicity alone again.

“You made a decision, Oliver,” Moira continued after awhile. “You made the decision to be in this with Felicity. You made the decision to be your daughter’s father and actively help with shaping her life. You knew that this wasn’t just going to be fun but actual work.”

“Yeah, I know,” Oliver replied.

He just hadn’t known that it would be that hard for Felicity to accept him as a part of her life and their baby’s life. He had thought she was feeling the same way he did, and that they were in this together and…

Oliver sighed. He had been thinking the same thoughts again and again. It was making a dull throbbing start right behind his forehead.

“What happened that suddenly made you doubt the decision again?” Moira asked.

“Nothing,” Oliver replied, shaking his head.

“Oliver-“

“I… don’t want to talk about this,” Oliver explained.

He really didn’t want to talk about it. He hadn’t even fully understood what was going on himself. He hadn’t been able to find out what Felicity drove to act that way. He wanted to know because he knew she loved him, and he couldn’t believe that she was excluding him to hurt him or anything. Right now he was just still too angry to talk to her.

“You should talk to Felicity about whatever you think she did wrong,” Moira said after awhile like she had read his thoughts. “I know she is suffering just as much as you do and-“

“Did you go to see her?” Oliver asked, unhidden anger in his voice at the thought that she had gone to see Felicity behind his back once more.

“No,” Moira hurried to answer, shaking her head. “No, I didn’t go to see her. I talked to Donna. She is worried because she and Quentin decided to go on a short vacation before the baby is born and they would have their hands full with supporting Felicity. They left this morning, but she called me yesterday to make sure I would have an eye on her. Laurel and Sara seem to be a great support, but at the end they are only kids, too. Anyway, Donna told me that Felicity is locking herself in her room a lot, and whenever someone asks her what is wrong, she doesn’t want to talk about it. She just said that she did something stupid and it might have driven you away.”

“And they still went on vacation?”

“Felicity told them they have to,” Moira replied. “They will probably come back earlier, though. Anyway, I want to do what I promised Donna and keep an eye on Felicity, but given my history with her, I guess it is not the smartest decision to go to her and check on her as long as you two seem to be having problems.”

Oliver was barely listening as he was instead trying to process all the information in his mother’s words. So Felicity was suffering because of the break-up or whatever that had been when they had last talked. She was suffering the same way he did by locking herself into her room without talking to anyone.

“You talked to Donna?” Oliver asked instead, cocking his head.

“Yes, she called me to talk and we had a coffee in a nice café and-“

“Oh my god,” Oliver whispered.

Something about the thought that his mother and Felicity’s mother were friends or allies or whatever now seemed really spooky. He knew if Felicity was here, they would talk about how spooky that was because their mothers meeting for coffee was just… weird.

“So you are going to talk to Felicity?” his mother asked when Oliver slid off the mattress and walked across the room.

“No,” Oliver replied. “I want to go to the gym.”

“Oliver,” his mother said with a sigh.

Oliver only shook his head. “Not now.”

Going to the gym and training until his muscles were aching was what really helped him. It had always been what way. Even at the beginning when he had just gotten to know that Felicity was pregnant he had been training. It was what cleared his head when he was feeling like everything was getting too much. Maybe after training all day he would actually get himself to call Felicity back.

He grabbed his sports bag, smiling slightly at the sight of the pink octopus in it. Instead of taking it out, he decided to just take it with him. Why not? It could spend him a little comfort before it would spend his daughter comfort.

“I guess you won’t be home for lunch again?” Moira called after him when he stepped through the door.

“You got it,” he called back.

 

 

Felicity looked towards the sky, hoping the words she had been searching for during the last couple of days would just fall down from the clouds. She had now spent days on trying to figure out the perfect words to apologize to Oliver and to convince him to give their relationship another chance. She had been unsuccessful which was why a gift from heaven seemed to be her only hope to eventually figuring the right words out after all.

Biting down on her bottom lip, Felicity looked at the Queen Mansion at the end of the drive way behind the iron-cast gate she had been walking up and down in front of for the last twenty minutes now.

She didn’t want to go and talk to Oliver without knowing exactly what she would say. She didn’t know when she would get another chance to talk to him. He had ignored all of her messages and calls in the last days. She got that. She knew that he needed time like she had needed time every once in awhile those last months. She also knew that she was the one who had to take a step towards him, though. And if she didn’t try to figure out if he was ready, she would never know. So this was her chance of winning Oliver back, and she wouldn’t do that by stuttering her way through a heart-to-heart.

But how was she going to tell him that no matter how perfect he would be, she still had that little, nagging voice in the back of her head that would tell her that he was going to leave her sooner or later? Like her dad had done?

When she felt the baby kicking her, Felicity stroked her hands over the bump gently, tracing the movements of her daughter. The baby seemed to react to her feelings more than ever. It was like she could feel exactly what Felicity felt, and whenever Felicity was worried, the baby would kick her mother like she was reassuring her that she wasn’t alone.

Felicity wasn’t alone. She hadn’t been alone since the moment in the Aquarium when she and Oliver had together decided that they would do this together. She didn’t know why she hadn’t been able to see that he had been there the entire time, supporting her and helping her through this. He hadn’t left her since the moment they had decided to do this together, or at least not until she had chased him away with shutting him out all the time. She knew her fear of being left wasn’t rational. Oliver had done his best to prove to her that he wouldn’t leave and that he was in this with her. He couldn’t have been more perfect.

Felicity pressed her lips together, squeezing her eyes shut. She needed to talk to Oliver, and the longer she waited, the harder it would get to actually do that. She would either talk herself out of going in there or end up being such a mess that the honest heart-to-heart would turn into something else. She didn’t know what it would turn into, but definitely something else.

Sucking in a deep breath, she reached out her hand to ring the bell, but before she could do so, the gate already opened. Felicity saw a black Porsche coming her way and quickly stepped aside to clear the way. She thought the car would just flash past her because with the driving speed she didn’t even think the driver would see her. The car came to a stop right in front of her, though.

“Tommy,” she said, surprised to see him here, when he lowered the window at the driver’s side and looked at her. “Hi.”

“Hey, I was just on my way to you,” he said. “Raisa said Oliver wasn’t home, so I figured he would be with you. I am sorry I never called you or anything by the way. I know you’ve been to my home a few times and tried to catch me.”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip, feeling terribly disappointed. So Oliver wasn’t even home. There went her chance of talking to him and trying to win him back. Unless she would wait here until he got back, but she wasn’t sure if that was a good idea. She didn’t run into Moira or anyone because it was Oliver she needed to talk to. And waiting here outside wouldn’t work either because the baby liked to use her bladder as a trampoline.

Tommy cleared his throat, probably feeling uncomfortable at the lack of words from her side. Felicity smiled at him sadly, pushing her hands into the hoodie she had stolen from Oliver at some point in the last months. The fact that it still smelled like him partook something equally comforting and saddening of it.

“So Ollie’s not with you?” Tommy asked.

Felicity shook her head. “We had a fight, and I haven’t seen him in a week.”

“What?”

“I… I did something stupid,” Felicity explained, looking down at her feet. “I… uhm… He’s mad at me and… I think he broke up with me, so…”

Felicity felt tears springing to her eyes. She hadn’t told anyone about this, not even Laurel. She had known that if she talked about it, she would start crying.

“Hold on a second,” Tommy asked her.

He quickly directed the car to the side of the driveway where he parked it and got out of it. He pushed his keys into the pocket of his leather jacket while he was approaching her, so he had both hands free to put to her elbows when he led her to a bench under a big tree. He kept his right hand to her left elbow when they sat down, squeezing comfortingly.

“Okay, tell me what happened,” he asked her.

Felicity took in a sniffling breath, quickly wiping some tears that had fallen from her cheeks before she answered, “I messed up. Big time. I… uhm… I applied for MIT and told him I was going there, but only when the reporters were talking about it already. He got mad and left. Now he won’t reply to my texts or my calls, and I have no idea how I can make this up to him.”

When her words ended in a sob, Tommy slid his hand from her elbow over her back to her shoulder and pulled her closer. He pushed her head gently to rest on his shoulder and stroked his fingers through her hair while she was crying.

Felicity didn’t miss that the situation had something weird to it. She had never really had a conversation with Tommy. It was her fault there was a wedge between him and his best friend. And yet here she was sitting next to him and crying at his shoulder while he was stroking one hand through her hair and the other over his back.

“I am sure the two of you will work through his,” Tommy said. “You are having a baby together.”

“But I-“

“It doesn’t matter what you did,” Tommy interrupted her gently. He slid a little away and waited until she looked at him before he added, “You and Ollie love each other. Ollie cares about you more than he ever cared about any other girl, and I know him since we’ve been children. I have to know. He’ll be able to forgive you, no matter what you’ve done.”

“You think?” Felicity asked.

Smiling, Tommy wiped her tears away from her cheeks and nodded. “Ollie is not unforgiving. He is a good guy, and he cares about you and the baby very much. He risked that the atmosphere at home would get really uncomfortable and his parents would maybe even disown him. He accepted getting kicked off the football team. He-“

“-risked losing you?”

Felicity took in a deep breath, wiping the last of her tears away. If this wasn’t her chance to win Oliver back, the least she could do was trying to win him his friend back.

“I just wished he would have trusted me enough to tell me,” Tommy replied with a sad smile. “We’ve been friends for so long, and we never kept a secret like that from each other. I know I am a party boy, but so was he. And I always thought we would both just grow up and be adults when we needed to. I would have grown up and been an adult for him. If I had known about this, I could have helped protect you. All those bullies wouldn’t have dared to say one more mean word. I just don’t get why-“

“It was my fault,” Felicity interrupted him. “That is why I have been showing up at your home again and again in the last weeks. I wanted to tell you that if you want to be angry at someone, you should be angry at me.”

Tommy frowned. “Why would you ask him of something like that?”

“I didn’t want anyone to know. I… I thought it was best that way. Oliver is… well, he’s Oliver ‘Ollie’ Queen. He is not a nobody. He is a somebody. I didn’t want to…”

Felicity sighed. She had said those words over and over again, and the more often she repeated them, the more wrong they sounded. When the baby kicked her, Felicity moved her hand over the bump without really thinking about it. She looked down, seeing the form of the bump changing with the baby’s movements.

“Honestly?” she asked, looking at Tommy. “I think I was just scared that he was going to leave anyway, and I was going to end up alone as the poor girl left by the great Ollie Queen. And when he was so perfect and gave me everything I needed, I just felt guilty for not trusting him enough to give him what I knew he wanted and needed.”

“So you pushed him away,” Tommy added, nodding. “Yeah, I know how that feels. I did the same when I have been with Laurel.”

Felicity had to fix it. Oliver had been so caring. He had been so sensitive of her wishes and needs. She should have given him the same. Their relationship could only work when they were leaning on each other and trusting each other and most importantly were honest with each other. He had done all of that. Now it was her turn.

“Listen,” Tommy said after awhile, putting his hand to her shoulder. “Laurel and I didn’t get to work through our issues, but you and Ollie should. You are having a baby. You need to work through this for the baby’s sake if not for your own. And if it helps, I think Ollie is just as scared as you are. His whole life is turned upside down with this, and I am sure that scares him. So talk it out and make up. The sooner, the better.”

Felicity nodded. Tommy was right. If she hadn’t been about to fight for Oliver and their relationship before, she would definitely do now. Maybe Oliver wouldn’t forgive her. Maybe they would end up broken up like Tommy and Laurel had, but the least she could do was try. She wouldn’t give up before she had done everything in her power to convince him that she could do better.

Her heart stitched painfully at the thought that maybe that wouldn’t be enough, but she knew that there was the possibility that he wouldn’t forgive her, and she would have to accept that. In that case she still had to make sure they would have some kind of communicative connection, though. Her fear of being abandoned shouldn’t have any negative effect on her daughter’s life.

“I guess I am just going to wait here for him until he comes back,” Felicity stated after awhile. “I… don’t know how I will manage to do that because the baby continues to maltreat my bladder and I am hungry again like I am always hungry, but I guess I should stay here.”

Tommy cleared his throat. “If Ollie isn’t at home and not with you, I guess he’s in the gym. I don’t think he will come home anytime soon. Waiting here is a waste of time.”

“What do you suggest then?” Felicity asked with a frustrated sigh. “That I just go home and hope to just run into him when I come here every day?”

She hated sitting around and not doing anything. She had needed the last days to get over the shock of what happened and to think everything through, but now that she knew what she had to do, she wanted to do it. She didn’t want to wait any longer. If she didn’t show Oliver how much he meant to her soon, he must think that she just didn’t want him anymore or was just waiting until he came back to her. Text messages and phone calls just weren’t enough, and she had needed one long week to gather her courage to come here already.

“I am going to drive you home now,” Tommy stated, squeezing her shoulder once more, “and then I will go to the gym and talk to Oliver.”

“That’s nice, but I really need to talk to him myself,” Felicity replied.

“I know,” Tommy replied, smiling comfortingly. “But we both know you shouldn’t be lounging around here for him to get back and you probably don’t want to go inside. I’m going to tell him that you’ve been here and wanted to talk to you, and I will tell him that I told you to go home because you’re having a baby and you should not be lounging around in front of a gate.

Felicity nodded slightly.

She was the last person to say that being pregnant meant being sick, but it was a fact that her back hurt terribly and her feet refused to hold her for too long given that she was gaining weight daily. Besides, her feet were slightly swollen because of the warm weather.

“I’ll just go home then,” she said with a sigh.

“I think you missed the part where I told you that I will drive you home,” Tommy said with a chuckle, getting up. “Come on.”

Felicity flashed a doubting glance at the small car, stroking her hand over her bump. “You know, I don’t travel light. So that’s really nice, but I am not even sure that I will fit into that car.”

“We will make it work.” Tommy chuckled. Pulling the keys from the pocket of his leather jacket, Tommy already headed towards the car. Only when he noticed that she didn’t follow him, he turned back around to her. “Everything alright?”

“It’s just… weird I guess,” Felicity said with hesitation. She bit down on her bottom lip. “We barely ever talked to each other and now… this… it’s just weird.”

Tommy smiled. He came back to her and put his hands to her shoulders before he said, “Ollie is still my best friend. He loves you and the two of you are having a baby together. So you and the baby are officially family to me now. You’re my sister from now on, and I always take care of my little sisters.”

He winked at her, making Felicity smile. “I always wanted to have a big brother.”

“Good,” Tommy replied.

He put an arm around her shoulders, leading her towards the car. Felicity watched him pushing the passenger seat as far back as possible. She still doubted that she would actually fit into that tiny car because her bump was really huge. When Tommy stepped aside and gestured for her to get into the car, she shot him one more insecure look, but she still tried to get in. It took a little held of Tommy. He had to help her get so far down that she could actually sit down on the low passenger seat, but to her surprise once she sat on the seat, getting her legs into the car was not as hard as she had thought it would be.

“See?” Tommy grinned. “I told you we would make it work.”

He carefully closed the door and walked around the car to get down on the driver seat. Starting the engine, he glanced at her to make sure that she had put the seatbelt on. Only then did he slowly drive the car down the driveway towards the street.

Felicity looked out of the window, wondering when she would finally be able to talk to Oliver. If Tommy didn’t get him to talk to her like she feared, it would happen because she still thought that she had to be the one to talk to him. She had been the one-

“Hey,” Tommy said gently, putting a hand to hers. “It’s going to be okay. You’re both in a really heavy situation. I think Oliver will understand that you didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“If you don’t get him to talk to me-“

“I will call you and tell you,” Tommy assured her. “Okay?”

Felicity nodded slowly.

She wasn’t sure if she was really okay, but at least she was as okay as she could be in this situation. She just needed some glimpse of hope that everything was going to be alright again.

“Okay, you know what?” Tommy said, tapping his fingertips to the steering wheel. “I will cheer you up. I know a lot of good jokes and-“

“I don’t think that is going to help with-“

“-and I will just tell you some of them until you start laughing,” Tommy said, ignoring her protest. “Let me think… Okay, let’s start with this one. Why do vampires believe everything you tell them?”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. She wasn’t sure really in the mood to hear any jokes, but Tommy seemed so eager of trying to cheer her up that she didn’t want to disappoint him.

“Because they are suckers,” Tommy finally revealed the punchline of his joke.

Felicity turned her gaze to him, looking at him with a frown. Was he serious?

“Okay, that was not my best one,” he admitted. “What did the finger say to the thumb? … I’m in glove with you.”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip. She felt almost sympathy for Tommy. There he was, being a well-known party boy and trying so desperately to make her laugh when all he knew where really, really bad jokes.

“Okay, this one is better,” Tommy promised, and Felicity nodded encouragingly while at the same time preparing herself for another really bad one. “What kind of pictures do turtles take?... Shellfies!”

For one second Felicity just stared at him blankly, not believing that this was really the best that Tommy Merlyn got. She snorted before bursting out into loud laughter.

“I’m sorry,” she said, still laughing. “I am so sorry, but those jokes are just bad. They are really, really bad.”

“Hey, they have been good enough to make you laugh,” Tommy replied. “They couldn’t have been that bad, right?”

“Yes, they have been,” Felicity objected. “They have been really bad. They-“

Gasping for breath, she moved her hand out, holding onto Tommy’s forearms tightly. Her nails were digging into the leather of his jacket.

“What- What’s wrong?” Tommy asked in slight panic, turning his eyes from the street to glance at her for a short second. “What’s going on?”

“I am so sorry,” she said.

“Wha- what?” Tommy asked. “What’s going on?”

“I… I think I just peed on your seat.”

“You  _what_?!”

Felicity could feel her face heating up, telling her that she was most likely blushing. She didn’t think she had ever been in such an embarrassing situation.

“I… I don’t know how that happened,” she said quickly. “I mean I did lose some drops every now and then because when there is a baby growing inside of you, there is little room for your organs, and the baby just loves moving against the bladder. I think… I don’t know… It never happened like this. I never really fully peed on a seat and… I will so pay for the cleaning of the seats though I have no idea if I can even afford that, but-“

When a pain ripped through her lower stomach and her back, Felicity tightened her grip on Tommy’s forearm, sucking in a deep breath.

“What’s going on now?” Tommy asked, sounding even more panicked than before.

“Pain,” Felicity hissed, but soon released a long breath when the pain decreased as suddenly as it had come.

“Felicity,” Tommy said slowly. When Felicity looked at him, she saw him eyeing her up with a barely readable expression on his face. He looked terrified, maybe helpless and even slightly disgusted. “I don’t think you peed on the seat of my car.”

“What? Yes, I did. I-“

“I think your water just broke.”

Felicity’s eyes widened in panic, and her voice was barely audible when she whispered, “What?”


	13. Chapter 13

Putting his towel around his shoulders, Oliver set up the treadmill. He would jog for twenty minutes to relax his muscles at the end of the long training day and then head home. He would probably get a burger on his way there and fall into bed as soon as he was home. He was sure that he would be too exhausted to imagine how Felicity’s body would feel pressed against his chest with his hands resting on her bump. Usually that was the torturing last thought that would always cross his mind before falling asleep.

Oliver shook his head to shake off the thoughts. Training excessively worked the best as a distraction when he was putting himself through really hard exercises. During his warm-ups and cool-downs his mind still reminded him of Felicity and their baby and of how much he missed them.

He wanted to go see her. He wished he could go and see her tonight, so they could talk about the future and he could make sure that both, she and the baby, were fine. Unfortunately, Oliver still felt the anger and disappointment boiling in the pit of his stomach, and he didn’t want to go see Felicity as long as he was still angry. If he did so, they would fight and that wasn’t good for the baby. Oliver didn’t want to be the kind of father who yelled at his child’s mother, especially when the kid was around.

Their daughter was able to hear now. She had been able to hear for some weeks already. He remembered how, when he had first started talking to their daughter, Felicity had stroked her hands through his short hair and massaged his scalp. She hadn’t forgotten to point out that their baby hadn’t been able to hear him yet, but it hadn’t stopped him from continuing to talk to her. He had just hoped that in some soul-connected way she would still be able to know that he was talking to her.

He had always tried to create intimacy with the little girl that was growing in Felicity. He had thought that with the pregnancy Felicity had it a whole lot easier because she carried their daughter with her all of the time. Okay, it probably wasn’t easy at all, but he was sure that it helped to create intimacy and a bond between them. He hadn’t had that, so he had tried to use every other opportunity to create a bond to their baby.

He had wanted to be a good father, one that loved his child and let his child know that as well as he could. He had wanted to be involved in the baby’s life as well as he could. He had wanted to-

Oliver groaned, speeding up his pace. He knew that from a training point of view he should rather keep it slow, but he didn’t want to think about how his dreams had burst like a rainbow bubble anymore. He had been so hopeful about the future and about how everything would be better once the baby would be born and Felicity’s parents would see how serious he was about all of this. It had gotten better those last weeks already, so he had thought…

It didn’t matter anymore, though. What he had envisioned for the future was irrelevant. Felicity had had her own plans and-

Groaning in anger, Oliver stopped the treadmill and headed towards the changing rooms. The sooner he would head home and go to bed, the sooner his thoughts would shut off. That was exactly what he needed right now, to have his thoughts be shut off.

He was just still so  _disappointed_. He had made mistakes, but he had done his best to make up for them. Besides, Felicity had shut him out of her life even before their situation had become more complicated because of the baby. She had always been pushing him away. Maybe he should have protested more, but he hadn’t wanted to put an ultimatum on her or anything. He had wanted to respect her wishes and-

Oliver opened the door of his locker a little too quickly and too firmly. It banged against the locker next to it, making a loud sound that earned him looks from the other two guys in the room. Oliver chose to ignore them rather than apologizing because he knew his voice wouldn’t be apologizing but angry which wouldn’t help the tension. Taking in a deep breath, he took his shampoo and headed to the shower.

Tomorrow he would pull himself together and talk to Felicity because they really needed to talk. There were decisions they had to make, big decisions. They would have to find a way to raise their daughter together although they weren’t together, and the first step to do so was for them to decide what college they would go to.

Oliver sighed when the hot water pelted down on him, massaging his sore muscles.

Maybe they would decide to go to Boston because of course he had applied to colleges there, and he had been accepted into two of them. Oliver had the opportunity to go to Boston, and he didn’t mind living there for a couple of years. What Felicity had failed to understand was that it wasn’t about moving to Boston itself that bothered him, but the fact that she had just planned on doing so without talking to him.

He would have followed Felicity across the United States wherever she had wanted to go if she had just asked him to. Was that too much? To be  _asked_  to do this for her, so they could  _discuss_  it?

Felicity was great with computers, and she could be even greater if she was only given the chance to expand her knowledge and her skill. He wanted Felicity to be great. He wanted her to have everything she wanted. He just hoped that maybe one day soon in the future she would realize that he was also part of what she wanted because he was sure that she did want him even if she didn’t exactly show him.

Quickly, Oliver changed from his towel into some casual clothes. He pulled his sports bag out of the locker and was just about to stuff his towels and sports clothing into it when his gaze fell on the pink octopus. He lifted the plush animal to his face, leaning his cheek against his.

He really had to pull himself together, so he could talk to Felicity tomorrow. No matter how angry or, rather, disappointed he was, they were still having a daughter together, and for her he had to pull himself together and try to talk to her. So that was what he would do.

Oliver stuffed his sweaty clothes and wet towels into his bag, but he kept the octopus in his hand. He didn’t want it to get wet or smell like sweat. He moved the strap of his bag over his shoulder before pushing his wallet into the back pocket of his jeans and gripping his phone.

During his warm-up he had noticed that he had forgotten to take it with him, but he hadn’t bothered enough to get back to the changing rooms to get it. Reading Felicity’s messages would work against the point of training and his phone was quiet otherwise because Tommy still didn’t talk to him. He took a quick look at the display and felt his heart stop beating.

His phone showed 112 missed calls and 48 missed text messages. His thumb was shaking slightly as he checked who had called so many times, and he felt that shaking expand at the answer. Seven of the missed calls had been from Felicity, 31 from Tommy, 32 from Laurel and 42 from Sara.

This couldn’t be good. This really couldn’t be good. He didn’t know what all the missed calls from Tommy meant, but so many missing calls from Felicity, Laurel and Sara just couldn’t mean anything good.

What if something had happened to the baby? What if all the stress he had caused her by leaving her had-

Just when he was about to call Felicity, an incoming call made the phone vibrate in his hand. Oliver was already about to reject the call when he looked down at the display and saw the caller’s ID.

“Tommy, I’m glad that you’re reaching out to talk, but I-“

“Where the hell have you been all day?” Tommy’s angry voice interrupted him. “I’ve been trying to reach you for hours.”

“I’m in the gym,” Oliver answered quickly. “I don’t want to stifle you, but Felicity-“

“-is with me,” Tommy stated.

Oliver tried to process that news. Why would Tommy be with Felicity? Had they met? Were they friends now? Did that mean everything was alright? Or-

His thoughts were interrupted by a long scream of pain that froze the blood in Oliver’s veins because he knew that it was Felicity who was screaming in pain. He felt a cold shiver running down his spine and a goose bump elicit on his arms. What the hell was happening there?

“That was great,” he heard Laurel say, but her voice was almost drowned by the wild pants Oliver could hear. “You’re doing great.”

“Oliver, you gotta get to Starling General,” Tommy said firmly, “because your girlfriend’s water broke in my car, and now she is breaking my hand, and I really,  _really_  don’t want to see a baby slipping out of her, okay? That is not how I want to see the lower part of a girl’s body, especially not your girlfriend’s so get the hell here! The second stage contractions just started. Man, you gotta get here.”

Felicity was in labor. His daughter would be born today. Felicity was in pain and already pushing, helping their daughter to life.

How long did this second stage pain take? He knew he had read it in one of those many books or brochures he had read to prepare himself for the birth and the first time after. He just couldn’t remember. So how was he going to figure out how much time there was left between his ten-minute-drive to the hospital and his baby girl being born? Because he couldn’t be too late for this moment and-

“Oliver!” Tommy’s voice ripped him from his thoughts almost violently, “You need to get here  _now_!”

With his bag over his shoulder, the pink octopus in one hand and his phone in the other Oliver started running towards the exit. Whatever tiredness and exhaustion had consumed every cell of his body before seemed to be gone by now.

“I will be there in ten, no,” Oliver interrupted himself, quickly making a rough estimate of how long the drive would take if he crossed the speed limit, “seven minutes at most. Tell Felicity to hold on. I will be there in time.”

Oliver hung up without waiting for an answer of his friend. He needed to hurry. He couldn’t be late to this. He had missed so much already. He couldn’t miss his baby’s birth. He needed to be there when she entered this world and took her first breath and cried her first cry and-

He just needed to be there.

 

 

A tear rolled down her cheek when the next contraction ended. Felicity shut her eyes tightly. The last pain had left her even more exhausted than the one before which Felicity had already thought had been quite exhausting. A whiny sob escaped her lips while her head was falling to the side tiredly, and she could feel more tears streaming down her face.

“You are doing great,” Laurel whispered, pressing a cold washcloth to her forehead like she had done for several hours now. “Just a few more times, and she will be here.”

Another cry escaped her lips, an even whinier than the one before. She was exhausted and in pain, and she just… She couldn’t do this anymore, and she didn’t  _want_  to do this anymore, either.

She had envisioned this moment for months now, trying to figure out how it would be. She had been scared of the pain and everything else, but she had thought she would get through it. She had thought she would get through it because Oliver was supposed to be here and her mom too. Both of them should have held her hands while she was pushing. Both of them should have encouraged her to go on. She had always known that she would depend on those two during the birth, and now neither of them was here.

It was her fault. She had told her mom to go on a vacation, so she could have a great time with her husband before her teenage daughter becoming a mother would need a lot of her attention. And she had pushed Oliver away for so long that he had finally had enough of her and had left.

So neither of the two people she needed most right now were here.

Laurel was great. She was holding her right hand, telling her how well she did. She had been handing her ice cubes to suck during the first pains, and she had always encouraged her to keep going. She was a great replacement for her mother, always supporting and gentle and always zealous for Felicity’s wellbeing. Given that Laurel had been there for her from the very beginning even before she had known that Felicity was pregnant, she felt like it was actually a good thing to have her here.

But neither Sara nor Tommy could replace Oliver.

Sara was sitting on a chair next to Laurel, squeezing Felicity’s leg in silent support every now and then. She barely said anything, though. The sounds that escaped her lips were mainly sounds of discomfort, telling Felicity that her stepsister most likely didn’t want to be here. Felicity understood that. She didn’t think she would be able to sit at the side of a woman giving birth even if it was her sister. Unfortunately, that knowledge didn’t help her much right now.

Tommy was standing at the opposite side of the bed, holding her left hand in hers. He made a slightly frozen face whenever she squeezed his hand in pain. Just like Sara he didn’t say a word, and just like with Sara, Felicity was sure that he didn’t really want to be here. He had just slipped into this when her water had broken on one of the expensive leather seats in his even more expensive car.

Neither of them could take Oliver’s place like Laurel could take her mom’s. She doubted that anyone could take Oliver’s place because Oliver was… he was Oliver, and she just needed him here.

When another pain ripped through her, Felicity pushed once more. She held both, Laurel’s and Tommy’s hand, in a tight grip. Her eyes were squeezed shut, and though she knew that the doctor was telling her to go on and keep pushing, she couldn’t hear him. All of her senses and actions were consumed by the pain.

Again, Laurel pressed the cold washcloth to her forehead, and it helped Felicity to feel better, even if it was only a little. Felicity sucked in a deep breath, and she felt another tear escaping her eye and running down her cheek. She knew she wouldn’t have much time before the next pain would start, so she quickly opened her eyes to look at her sister.

“Did you try to call my mom?” she asked Laurel.

“I did several times,” Sara replied, “but she didn’t pick up yet.”

Felicity nodded, turning her head to Tommy, who still looked slightly frightened by what was happening here.

“When’s Oliver going to be here?”

Tommy didn’t get to answer as the next pain was ripping through her already. Felicity had lost count of how many of those second stage pains she had been going through already now. She had read that some women just needed two or three of those contractions to hold their babies in their arms, but then again there had been woman going through these kinds of pains for several hours.

How long had she been in it? It felt like a lot of time, but Oliver wasn’t here yet, and he had been supposed to be here in only few minutes, so it couldn’t be that long, right? Felicity was going crazy. She didn’t know how she even got to form one coherent thought.

“He should be here any second,” Tommy swore to her, squeezing her hand comfortingly. “He had been supposed to be here almost ten minutes ago actually.”

Laurel gently turned her face to her, pressing the washcloth to her stepsister’s forehead once more. She waited until Felicity looked at her before she said, “You are really doing great. A few more pushes and-“

“No!” Felicity whined, shaking her head. “I don’t- I don’t want to do it anymore, and I can’t. I-“

Her words got lost in the sob that escaped her lips, though.

She was exhausted, so terribly exhausted. Felicity couldn’t remember if she had ever been this exhausted, and she had been exhausted often lately. Even the most serious sicknesses and the months of pregnancy hadn’t exhausted her as much as this. She hadn’t been prepared for this.

“Felicity,” Laurel said, gently stroking over her sister’s hair. “I know it must tire you out, but you gotta keep going. You can do it. You are-“

When another pain ripped through her, she heard Laurel’s and the doctor’s encouragement to push, and the pain urged her to do so, but there was no strength between her push. She just could not keep going. She felt unable to, too weak to do anything but bare the pain.

“Felicity, you gotta keep pushing,” Laurel told her, against gently stroking her hand over her sister’s head. “The more you push when the doctor tells you to, the sooner it will be okay, okay? Your baby-“

“Oh my god, I was sent from one room to the other in the hospital. Did I miss it?”

“Oliver-“ His name escaped Felicity’s lips like a prayer. At the side of his sweaty yet handsome self approaching the bed hurriedly, a few more tears escaped her eyes. “Oliver, I-“

Her words were interrupted by another scream when the next pain ripped through her. She barely realized that Tommy let go of her hand and moved away from her side to make room for Oliver. He held her hand and pressed a lingering kiss to her forehead. Felicity clawed at his hand, and as soon as the pain was over and she was able to form a word again, she turned her head to Oliver.

“I’m so sorry. I’m so, so sorry. I-“

“None of this matters right now,” Oliver interrupted her immediately with his free hand still on the top of her head. “We will talk when all of this is over. Right now the only thing that matters is that our baby girl gets here, okay? That is what you or we both need to focus on right now, okay? For her to be born safely.”

“I can’t. I can’t do it anymore,” Felicity sobbed.

“Yes, you can,” Oliver assured her. “You are-“

Again Felicity screamed in pain, her hands tightening around Laurel’s and Oliver’s fingers. She was so, so exhausted. When would this finally be over? Women always said that you forgot the pain once you hold your baby in your arms, but how was she supposed to forget this? Felicity couldn’t see a way how that would be possible.

“Okay, Felicity,” the doctor said, “if you help now, you will need maybe two more pushes, and it is done. Giving up is only going to prolong this.”

“I can’t,” Felicity said with a sob.

“Yes, you can,” Oliver told her.

He put two fingers to her chin and gently turned her head to make her look at him. Felicity looked into his deep blue eyes, feeling her breathing slowly calm down a bit.

“I love you, Felicity,” Oliver said firmly. “And you are the strongest person I know. If there is anyone who can do it, it’s you. I know you are exhausted, but with only two more pushes we will have our baby, okay?”

Felicity took in a sniffling breath, looking into Oliver’s eyes that knew no doubt, but only belief in her. Oliver still loved her, and he still believed in her. He trusted her to be able to do this. And she wouldn’t disappoint him, not again.

When she felt the next contraction, Felicity leaned forward as much as she could and pushed. She had no idea where that energy suddenly came from, but it was there. She barely heard the doctor telling her that she was doing well and it was only one more push before it was over. She barely felt Oliver lifting her hand to his lips and kissing it. And she barely heard Laurel telling Sara and Tommy to get out already while she would follow as soon as it was over. All she concentrated on was pushing and catching her breath in the short break she got before the next contraction would need all of the energy she had left.

As soon as she felt the next contraction nearing, Felicity leaned forward once more and gave everything she had left to give into that hopefully final push.

The pain suddenly fell off of her, and Felicity almost wondered if she had fallen into a hole of nothingness because she couldn’t hear anything, couldn’t see anything, couldn’t feel anything. At least she couldn’t feel anything but the relief that was rushing through her veins. It only lasted for the beat of a second, though.

The second she heard her baby’s cry the feeling of nothingness was replaced by a joy she had never felt before. Her tears of pain were replaced by tears of unbelievable happiness that actually, despite everything she had thought before, erased the pain she had been going through for the last hours from her mind. All that mattered were the cries of their newborn daughter that filled the room.

When the nurse put the little girl, who was only loosely wrapped into a blanket, onto Felicity’s chest, Felicity’s sobs mingled with the newborn baby’s cries. It was like her entire being suddenly revolved all around that little human being in her arms. Carefully, Felicity placed her hands on the baby’s butt and head, kissing her temple gently.

It took awhile before she was able to take her eyes off the baby. She turned her head to look at Oliver, resting her cheek against their daughter’s head while she did so. Oliver was still standing at her side, looking at their daughter with an unreadable expression on his face.

“Oliver,” Felicity said with a sob, “we have a baby.”

Oliver nodded, obviously too overwhelmed to move or even speak. He just stared at them.

Felicity pressed another kiss to their daughter’s temple before she whispered, “Look, baby. There is daddy.”

Felicity saw tears springing to his eyes at the sound of the word ‘daddy’ falling from her lips. He put a hand to Felicity’s head and the other to their baby’s back. His pinky touched Felicity’s hand on the little girl’s butt, and he stroked his finger against the side of her palm for a short moment. He then leaned forward, pressing a gentle kiss to the side of their still crying daughter’s head, and whispered something into her ear Felicity couldn’t understand. As soon as the last syllable had been spoken, he lowered his lips back against their daughter’s skin to rest it there.

Her stomach fluttered. Having Oliver so close, barely a breath away, and the sight of him kissing and whispering to their baby girl... It just made her stomach flutter so much, and it made her realize what maybe she only really understood now. Their baby girl really was theirs, truly  _theirs_  and nobody else’s.

Oliver suddenly looked at her like he was realizing the exact same thing. His blue eyes focused on her eyes, but they flickered to her lips for the beat of a second. Felicity felt her heart skip a beat at the expression in his face. She loved Oliver, maybe even more than she had been able to admit to herself.

“I love you,” she suddenly whispered, “and I am so sor-“

She didn’t get to finish the sentence as Oliver’s lips pressed to hers in a gentle, yet firm kiss. Felicity moved a hand to his cheek, gently stroking her fingertips over his skin. Their fingers linked on their daughter’s back before Oliver pulled back, looking at her for a long moment.

Despite the quite messy circumstances this moment felt a lot more perfect than she had thought it would be. With their baby lying on her chest and Oliver’s fingers linked to hers on their baby’s back and the way he looked at her… it was kind of perfect. She also knew that as perfect as this moment seemed to be, there were still problems beneath the surface that they needed to discuss.

“We still need to talk,” she whispered. “I’m so sorry for what I did and I-“

“Hey,” Oliver whispered quietly. He put a hand to her cheek, gently wiping away the wetness the tears had left on her skin. “We don’t have to talk about this now.”

“But-“

“No,” Oliver replied. “This moment is one of her first experiences in this world, and it is a moment just for her. We won’t discuss our problems now and here. And we certainly won’t discuss this as long as you didn’t have any rest, okay?”

Felicity hesitated for a moment. She didn’t want to delay this any longer. She owed Oliver an apology, and they needed to make decisions for their daughter’s life. With her unexpected entry into this world-

“Hey,” Oliver whispered once more, to get back her attention, “don’t think about it for now.”

“Okay,” Felicity whispered quietly, turning her head back to their daughter. “She is beautiful, isn’t she?”

Oliver smiled, looking at their daughter through the tears in his eyes. “She is perfect.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **In case you missed the very important announcement regarding the future of this fic,[here it is](http://smkkbert.tumblr.com/post/148582372650/hi-im-loving-the-best-mistake-and-i-was)!**


	14. Chapter 14

Felicity felt like she was drifting in and out of sleep. One moment she could hear a muffled voice whispering, and the next moment she felt her body growing heavier again as she was pulled back into sleep. She felt caught in that state almost like forever.

The short time Felicity felt like she was almost awake, only unable to move, she tried to figure out where she was and what had happened. She was unbelievable tired which shouldn’t be a surprise because she had felt tired for months now, but it was a different type of tired. And Felicity was almost sure that she wasn’t in her bed because her mattress was harder than the one she was lying on.

It wasn’t until she heard the low cry that she remembered. The baby was born. The little girl she and Oliver had been looking forward to meeting for months now had entered the world.

Felicity tried to get herself to wake up. She needed to wake up, so she and Oliver could finally talk. Now that their daughter was born, it was even more important than it had already been before when it had been just them with the baby on the way. She wished they could have found the opportunity to talk before the birth already, but that hadn’t worked out. So now it really was time.

She was still feeling so exhausted and her limbs were still so stiff from sleep, though, that her body refused to let her wake up completely. Slowly she got more aware of her surroundings, though. She could hear Oliver’s quiet voice right next to her. He was whispering to their daughter and was only interrupted by the occasional sounds their daughter made.

She concentrated on his words, trying to break through the haze that was making it impossible to figure out what he was saying. She felt that she could draw the same comfort from the sound of his voice now as she had been able to draw comfort from the deep blue of his eyes during the last minutes of birth when she had just wanted to give up.

Felicity doubted that anyone else could have helped her in that moment. Oliver had been all she had needed, and he and their daughter was all she needed now.

It took some more times for Felicity to finally understand the words Oliver’s gentle voice whispered. She fought the urge of falling back to sleep to listen to what he was telling their daughter instead.

“…so much smarter than me. She is the smartest person I know. When she talks, I barely understand a word. She is… she is just really super-smart.”

Felicity smiled at that, or at least she felt like smiling. She wasn’t sure if it really showed on her face since her body still refused to follow her will.

“And because mommy is so super-smart, she deserves to go to the best college there is for her. The best college for mommy is in Boston, so when you’re a little bit older, I think we will move there. I don’t know much about Boston yet, but I hope it’s a place you will grow to like because I want you to have the best life possible, and that means that you should grow up in a place you really like and-“

When Felicity fought the sleep this time, she managed to actually really wake up. While her body was moving slightly and her tense muscles relaxing gradually, her eyes opened. She had to blink a few times because of the bright light, but eventually her eyes were adjusting to it.

“Mommy’s awake,” she heard Oliver whisper.

She turned her head in his direction, watching him get up with their little girl in his arms. He gently placed her on Felicity’s chest, and she instinctively put her hands to their daughter’s little body.

“I can feel her heartbeat,” Felicity whispered, rubbing her right hand over the little girl’s back.

“I know,” Oliver replied with a smile. Slowly he leaned forward and kissed their daughter’s temple before he sat back down on the chair next to Felicity’s bed. “It’s amazing, isn’t it?”

“Yeah…”

Felicity looked their daughter up carefully. She was without any doubt the most beautiful baby she had ever seen. Someone had put her into clothes while Felicity had been asleep. She was wearing a white onesie with colorful dots and long sleeves. A few dark strains of hair were showing under the matching baby cap. Felicity moved one finger beneath the baby’s left hand, and immediately the little girl gripped her mother’s finger tightly.

“How long have I been asleep?” Felicity asked, turning her head, so her cheek was resting against her daughter’s head and she could look at Oliver.

“Not long. Only like an hour or something,” Oliver replied. “How are you feeling?”

“Tired.”

Smiling, Oliver got up and sat down on the edge of the mattress. He pressed a lingering kiss to her forehead, tugging a few strands of hair that had fallen to her face behind her ear. He kept his forehead against hers for a long moment, and only then he pulled back, moving his hand from Felicity’s face down her arm to her hand on their daughter’s back.

Only now, Felicity realized that Oliver was holding something in his free hand that she couldn’t really recognize. Frowning she nodded to the hand in his lap, asking, “What’s that?”

“Oh,” Oliver made, lifting the thing in his hand, so Felicity could see.

“Is that an octopus?”

“Yes,” Oliver replied with a chuckle. “I figure if our baby should have any companion, it should have to do something with the Aquarium and this little friend seemed to be perfect.”

“It really is,” Felicity said with a smile. “Baby, did you see the octopus daddy bought you?”

Of course the sleeping baby on her chest didn’t answer. She just kept breathing in and out evenly, not even moving.

“When did you buy it?”

“It’s the surprise Thea and I talked about the day we’ve been shopping together before…” Oliver looked at her for the beat of a heart longer before he lowered his gaze to the octopus with a sad smile on his lips.

“Before we broke up,” Felicity finished for him, nodding slightly.

There it was – the end of the carefree first moments with their daughter. Felicity was glad they were finally getting to the important conversation, though. She wished she could have talked to him and made things up with Oliver before their daughter had been born. Things didn’t always work out perfectly, though, and now she needed to live with that.

“I am-“

“Can I start please?” Oliver interrupted her, looking up from his hands to lock eyes with her instead. When Felicity nodded, he moved his hand on hers slightly before he said, “I am sorry for being so hard on you that day. I-“

“You don’t have to apologize for anything.”

“Yes, I do,” Oliver replied firmly. “The last hour I sat here, holding our daughter, I thought about it, and I figured that it hasn’t been fair. What I said to you hasn’t been fair. I accused you of keeping me out of your and the baby’s life instead of including me, but fact is that I let it happen. I let you make all of the decisions, and I might have complained, but not as much as I should have. Part of the reason it has come so far is because I let it go on for so long, and I am willing to admit that. So I apologize for blaming it all on you when actually I had my part in all of it, too.”

Oliver apologized to her? After everything he was the one apologizing? Felicity didn’t know what to think about that yet. She had been ready to take all the blame because she did feel responsible for things having gone so wrong between them. She just looked at Oliver for a long moment, waiting if he wanted to say something.

“Can I apologize now?” she asked.

She waited until he nodded before she turned her hand on their daughter’s back and linked her fingers with his. She already opened her mouth to say something when she realized that she still hadn’t figured out what to say or rather how to say it.

“About fifty percent of the teenage father split before the baby is born, and nine out of ten are no longer around by the time the child is five years old. Even if the parents get married, the divorce rate is higher than for most couples. Sixty percent of all teen marriages now end in separation or divorce within six years.”

Oliver looked at her for a long moment, trying to figure out what to do with the information she had given him. “What?”

Felicity took in a deep breath, closing her eyes. She squeezed Oliver’s fingers gently, reassuring herself that he was still here, before she opened her eyes and looked at him.

“When I was trying to figure out what to do about the pregnancy,” she started explaining after awhile, “I searched the web about what possibilities there were. I stumbled over this site that tried to sum up what factored into the decision that come with an unplanned teenage pregnancy. Apparently some teenage moms think that keeping the baby is a good idea to force the father to commit to them, and that website exposed all the reasons why that would be a bad idea.”

Oliver frowned slightly. “Are you saying you wanted to have her to-“

“Oh my god, no,” Felicity interrupted him, shaking her head vehemently. “No, that was not what I was planning on doing. Never would I try to force you to stay with me when that’s not what you want and-”

“Okay,” Oliver said gently, squeezing her fingers. “Then why are you telling me about this?”

“Because I figured that if all these relationships and marriages end in so little time,” Felicity started, taking in a deep breath to gather her courage, “I would be alone sooner or later anyway, so I should just get prepared for doing anything on my own already.”

Oliver looked at her for a long moment, obviously processing her words. Felicity was glad he didn’t say anything yet because she hadn’t said everything she felt she needed and wanted to say yet anyway.

“I tried to do everything on my own to prove to myself that I would be able to do it alone and that being a teenage mother wouldn’t take away the chances everyone always said were taken from me when I really had this baby,” she continued. “The more time passed, the more obvious it seemed to be that you weren’t going to leave. Deep in my heart I knew you weren’t going to leave, but these facts kept spinning in my head, and I couldn’t stop thinking about how my dad left me and how much that hurt. I felt like if I was really actively leaning on you, it would just destroy me even more if you left. My mom always pointed out that she should have never leaned on my dad because when he left she had nothing left and had been responsible to take care of a child alone. And somehow all of that stopped me from trusting you the way I should have and the way you would have deserved. I just-“

When tears sprang to her eyes and her throat started burning, Felicity took in a deep breath.

She still didn’t completely understand what had made her push Oliver away again and again. She knew where it came from, or at least she thought so, but it just wasn’t logical. And Felicity had already thought of herself as quite the logical person. Oliver was not her dad. Oliver had always done his best to prove to her that he was really in this with her and that he wanted this. Yet, Felicity couldn’t shake her experiences with her own father or the facts she had read about teenage fathers. It all influenced her.

Oliver squeezed her fingers. He put the octopus away to wipe away a few of her tears that had fallen. He didn’t say anything. He just let her cry the tears she couldn’t stop from streaming down her cheeks.

Only when the last tears had been dried, he whispered, “Felicity, I am not your father.”

“I know.”

“And I am not one of the teenage fathers who will leave you alone.”

Felicity lowered her gaze to their daughter. She knew in her heart that Oliver really meant what he said. She had known it in awhile. It hadn’t stopped her from continuing to push him away, though. And she was ashamed of that, ashamed of being so scared when he had tried his best to make up for leaving her in the very beginning.

“I love you, Felicity,” Oliver whispered. “I love you, and I love our daughter. I don’t know what else I can do to assure you that-“

“You shouldn’t have to do anything,” Felicity stated. “You have been so… supportive since the moment you decided you were all in. We’ve been together for so long now. I just… I should be able to trust you.”

“Yes, you should,” Oliver replied, but his voice was so gentle that Felicity didn’t feel like she needed to turn her gaze away from him despite how harsh the meaning of his words seemed to be. “You have been through a lot, though. Your dad left you. I left you when I found out about the pregnancy. I promise you, though, that I won’t leave again. Even if we don’t make it and we end up not being together at some point in the future, I will still be here for you and her.”

“You shouldn’t have to reassure me of that,” Felicity whispered guiltily. “I should know by now.”

“Maybe,” Oliver replied, “but you don’t, so-“

“No, I-” Felicity interrupted him. She took in a deep breath and locked eyes with him before she nodded, figuring that her words were true. “I think I start to actually really accept that.”

“Despite your dad and the facts?”

“You’re still here despite everything, aren’t you?” Felicity asked, squeezing his hand. “I can’t promise I will be perfect-“

“I don’t expect you to be perfect,” Oliver hurried to say. “I just want us to work on this. I know you can’t just flip a switch and decide that you can forget everything you have experienced in terms of abandonment. I know that there might still be doubts when tough times are coming. I want us to work on being in a relationship that is based on trust and honesty, though. It’s something we both need to work on. You need to learn to trust me, and I need to learn to be honest with you when something is bothering me. We need to be partners in this mission we decided to take, the mission to raise this beautiful baby girl as best as we can. Together.”

Felicity nodded, feeling another tear rolling down her cheek. “I am so sorry, Oliver.”

“It’s okay,” Oliver explained, “but it’s going to be because we will get past this.”

“So you will take me back?”

Oliver left out a breathy chuckle. “I don’t have much of a choice in that, Felicity, because I love you so much that not being with you is… I don’t want to give up on us yet, and I think I owe myself and you and our daughter to give us another chance. And like I said I wasn’t completely innocent that things have gotten so out of hand.”

“I love you, too,” Felicity replied with a quiet sob. “So much.”

Without any hesitation Oliver leaned forward and kissed her. He didn’t let her lean in the last few inches like he usually did. He just kissed her gently, tracing her bottom lip with his tongue. When their lips parted, their foreheads rested against each other for a long moment.

“Thank you for not giving up on us,” Felicity whispered against his lips, “or on me.”

“Never,” Oliver replied. He brushed his lips against hers once more before he eventually pulled back. “And now that we know what we have to work on, I think we should talk about college.”

Felicity nodded. “I know you don’t want to go to Boston-“

“I don’t mind going to Boston,” Oliver objected. “I would just like to feel included in the choice where we’re going to live in the future because I want us to live together and-“

“I-“ Felicity started, screwing her eyes shut for a moment. She was tired and exhausted, but she wanted to talk everything out once and for all now. “Oliver, I would like to Boston, and I would love to live with you, so would you… Would you like to go to Boston with me? Would that be okay?”

“It would be great.” Oliver smiled. “I would love to go to Boston with you.”

“And that’s all?” Felicity asked. “No objections about going to Boston or anything?”

“I don’t want to put any obstacles in your way, Felicity. I don’t want to stop you from being a great… whatever you are going to be in the IT world. I just want us to work together for the sake of our daughter,” Oliver explained. “We’re young and this is going to be hard enough as it is. If we don’t work together in this, it is only going to be harder. I think we just need to work on our communication.”

“Yeah…”

Felicity nodded because Oliver was right. They needed to work on their communication and telling each other what they wanted and what scared them.

“It will be hard, won’t it?” Felicity asked, feeling that maybe she should start with the first step already. “The two of us alone in Boston with her.”

“It will be,” Oliver said with a sigh, “but we owe it ourselves and her to at least try, right? I will talk to my parents and figure out if I can use the money on my trust fund to maybe buy an apartment.”

“And then we will have to make our schedules work together, so we will have enough time for her and for each other.”

Oliver nodded. “It’s not going to be easy, but we got through the last months, so we will get through this, too.”

Felicity looked at Oliver, trying to find any doubt in his eyes. Oliver seemed to be so sure, though. There didn’t seem to be any doubt. He didn’t look worried that maybe they wouldn’t make it.

“How can you have so much faith?” Felicity asked. “I am so scared about what will come, but you seem so sure about all of this…”

“I am scared, Felicity,” Oliver replied with a sigh. “I am scared that we are too young for this and we won’t make it, but… I think that worrying about that every second and letting that sabotage us before we can even try to make it work won’t help. Does that make sense?”

Felicity smiled. “A lot more than what I was trying to do the last months.”

Oliver shook his head, squeezing her hand. “Let’s… I don’t know… I think we should move forward and not hold onto the past from now on.”

“Thanks for giving me another chance without making me feel like I am the most horrible person in the world.”

“You did the same for me when I left you alone. What person would I be if I couldn’t give you another chance?” Oliver asked. He was about to say something more when their daughter started moving slightly. “I think someone woke up.”

Felicity looked at the little girl. “You know, I am so in love with her, I don’t think I will ever be able to say ‘no’ to her.”

Oliver chuckled. “That’s good to know because I am sure that I can use that for myself in some way one day.”

Smiling, Felicity loosened her hand from Oliver’s grip to put the palm of her hand on their daughter’s back and rest her own hand on top of his instead. She liked the sight of their linked fingers on their little girl’s back. It made her feel like this was actually real and they were a family now, forever connected.

“I love watching her sleep,” Oliver said. “I think it relaxes me as much as going to the gym does. I can’t imagine what it will be like to be apart from her even if it’s only for a few hours.”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip. During the time they had spent apart, their living arrangements had been one of the many things she had thought about. It was a while before they would move to Boston in case everything would even work out that way.

“Would you like to move into my parents’ house?” Felicity asked. “I know it’s not the perfect solution, but we would have my family’s help and could still do this together, really together. You wouldn’t miss anything anymore.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows. “Do you think your parents would allow that?”

“My mom likes you,” Felicity replied, “so I hope so, yes. Besides, I won’t give her much of a choice. Either you move in, or I will move out.”

“I don’t think you should ask her like that,” Oliver said with a quiet chuckle. “It sounds like threat. But, yes, I would love to move in with you.”

“I would love that, too,” Felicity replied, tightening her hold on his hand on their daughter’s back. “And I am sure she would like that, too.”

There was a long moment of quiet. Their little girl was moving a little on Felicity’s chest, making low sounds. She wasn’t crying, though, and she didn’t seem to be really awake. Sooner or later she was certainly going to wake up and wanting to be fed. Felicity felt relieved that she hadn’t woken up yet, though, because there was one more than important thing they still needed to discuss. No matter how tired and exhausted she felt, it couldn’t wait.

“Oliver?”

“She needs a name.”

“Yeah,” Felicity replied, smiling at him. “You read my mind.”

“It’s weird to call her ‘baby’ or ‘our girl’ all of the time.”

“Absolutely.”

They had discussed baby names from time to time, but they had never found any they had both been able to agree on. It had been hard enough to find a name one of them had liked already. Apparently Oliver and Felicity were quite picky about baby names.

“Do you have any suggestion?”

“I don’t know,” Felicity replied honestly. “I have a name I like, but actually I think it would be better as a middle name and… I don’t know… Did you find a name?”

“I have grown quite fond to the idea of naming her Madeleine.”

“Madeleine Grace Queen-Smoak.”

“Queen-Smoak?” Oliver asked.

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “I think it would be nice if she carried both of our names, don’t you think? Because she is ours and, well, I just thought you would like it.”

Oliver smiled. “I do like the idea, but I feel like ‘Smoak-Queen’ has the better ring to it. Madeline Grace Smoak-Queen.”

“Are you sure?”

He leaned forward and kissed Felicity’s lips gently, tightening his hold on her fingers in the meantime. When he pulled back, he lowered his head to press a kiss to the back of their daughter’s – Madeleine’s, Felicity corrected herself in her thoughts – head.

“I am very sure.”

They rested their foreheads against each other’s, enjoy this moment that their family was now truly united. They were together. Madeleine was here. They had a rough plan where their future might take them and what they had to do to make it work. That was a good place to start this new life, a new life together.

Felicity knew it wasn’t going to be easy, but they would make it work because they were together and that was when they were the strongest.

“I like this,” Felicity whispered.

“So do I. I wish it could be just the three of us together like this forever.” As soon as the last syllable had fallen from his lips, there was a quiet knock at the door. Oliver sighed. “Right. You can’t say it out loud if you want it to come true.”

Felicity smiled at him comfortingly, and Oliver winked at her when he pulled back.

“Yes?” he called out, turning his head to the door.

Tommy stuck his head in the door. “Hey, can I come in?”

“Sure,” Felicity replied before she added to Oliver, “Tommy has been great. When my water broke in his car, he immediately drove me to the hospital and called you, Laurel and Sara. He never left my side and-“

“We already talked,” Oliver told her. “And he also told me that you were waiting for me at home when you met.”

Felicity nodded. “So the two of you…?”

“We’re fine,” Tommy replied, stepping closer. “And as a sign of how much I support you and your family, I give my beloved car to you as a present to your daughter’s birth.”

Oliver frowned. “Tommy, what do you think Felicity, Madeleine and I should do with a Porsche that only has two seats?”

Tommy shrugged his shoulders. “Keep it is a memento for this exciting day or sell it or whatever. I don’t think I can ever even look at the car after what happened in there. No offense, Felicity.”

“None taken,” she assured him.

“So Madeleine it is?” Tommy asked with a sigh. “And there I thought my heroic act of helping Felicity would help give her a strong name like… Thomasina.”

Felicity laughed, while Oliver just replied, “Yeah… no.”

Tommy shrugged his shoulders. “I guess living with the name Madeleine is a lot easier. It’s a great name. She is beautiful by the way.”

“I don’t think ‘beautiful’ is enough to describe how perfect she is,” Oliver replied.

“Do you want to hold her?” Felicity asked, already lifting Madeleine off her chest.

Tommy took a step back, though, lifting his hands defensively like Felicity had just wanted to attack him. “Thank you, but no thank you. I don’t think that is something I consider doing anytime soon. As happy as I am for you, I don’t think I am ready for that yet, maybe when I get used to seeing her. Besides, there are two pairs of grandparents and three aunts waiting outside and discussing who gets to hold her first and for how long.”

“Okay, if that is the case, I think I want to hold her once more before I don’t get another chance in the next hours,” Oliver stated.

He carefully lifted Madeleine from Felicity’s chest and cradled her to his chest. She looked even smaller in his strong arms, Felicity realized.

“She suits you, man,” Tommy said. “Best girl I ever saw you with, right beside Felicity of course.”

“Saved in the last second,” Felicity mumbled.

“So shall I get the others in?”

Oliver nodded with a sigh. “I can’t keep the two of them to myself forever, right?”

“Right,” Tommy agreed. “I will go and get them.”

When the door was closed behind Tommy, Felicity smiled at Oliver. She took the pink octopus and cradled it to her chest, saying, “Tommy is right. The two of you look great together.”

“Thank you,” he replied. “She makes it easy to look great which reminds me that now might be the perfect moment for our first real family photo.”

Oliver moved on the mattress, so he was sitting next to Felicity, and pulled his phone from the back pocket of his jeans. He held his arm out, trying to find the perfect camera position to make a great first photo from.

“Ready?” he asked.

“Absolutely,” Felicity replied.

Oliver took the photo, the first photo of their new family, to make them remember this moment forever. And it was perfect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter in this time. The last chapter of the fic will be a flashforward to in almost six years. Each of the three parts in this series will end with an epilogue, that shows our little family a few years in the future. I just wanted you to know.


	15. Epilogue

_Six years later… well, at least almost_

Felicity shot another glance at her watch, shaking her head with a low groan. She could actually slap herself for arriving last minute to her date with Oliver and Mae when she had spent days now promising that she would be on time. It had been so important for the two of them and hence for her. Her only excuse was that she had left the office half an hour ago which was more than in time, but the traffic had just been a nightmare today. And, well, last minute was still in time, right?

While she hurried towards the entrance, she took a quick look around the parking lot. The Aquarium had never been very well patronized as long as Felicity could remember, especially during the evening hours, but she couldn’t remember ever feeling like she was the only person here. Frowning, she wondered if maybe the Aquarium was closed today and quickly took a look at her phone, checking for any messages. There was indeed one from Oliver.

_Hey, hon. Mae and I are waiting for you now. Don’t mind the private circle sign at the entrance. Just come in. ;)_

Frowning even more, Felicity slowly came to a stop right in front of the door. When she looked up from her phone and looked at the doors instead, she found the sign he had written about. Again Felicity took a look around like she was waiting for someone to stop her to go through the door, but it seemed like there really wasn’t anyone here.

Eyeing herself up in the slightly reflecting glass of the doors, she put her phone back into her purse before she quickly made up her slightly messy hair. Something told her that this wasn’t their usual Aquarium date they tried to have once each month. This seemed to be a little more, a lot more even. If she had known that, she would have certainly worn something better than this dress. With the triangle cut-out on the front it was one of her sexier work dresses, but she could have definitely done better.

Felicity decided that whatever she would do now wouldn’t be enough to actually fix her appearance. She already looked as acceptable as possible after these exhausting hours of work. It wasn’t the first time they met here after her work, though, so she was sure that Oliver knew what to expect. So she quickly opened the door and stepped into the building.

The door hadn’t fallen shut behind her yet when Felicity’s breath got caught in her throat at what she saw in front of her. The dark flagstones in the spacious foyer of the Aquarium were covered with rose petals. Small lanterns on the floor flanked a way towards the back of the building where the aquariums were.

“Okay, this really is a big thing,” Felicity whispered to herself.

Taking in a deep breath, she started following the path the lanterns formed for her. On her way to wherever it would take her she tried to figure out if she had missed any important date like a birthday or anniversary, but she definitely hadn’t. They had had their seven-year anniversary a few weeks ago, and it still was one month to Mae’s birthday, no matter how much she tried to convince them each day that it was her birthday already.

She could hear her daughter before she could see her. The quiet voice singing  _Part of your world_ couldn’t be mistaken as anything but Mae’s. She loved that song since she had watched that movie for the first time. Oliver had been singing it to her every evening for three years now. It was kind of their thing.

As soon as Felicity turned the corner towards the aquarium of the octopus, she saw the two most important people in her life. Mae was standing right at the aquarium, pressing her hand against the glass while singing. She was carrying her own stuffed octopus with her in one hand. She had put it into a pink tutu that matched the color of her own best dress perfectly.

Oliver, dressed in a great looking suit, was standing a few feet aside. He had his right hand pushed into the pocket of his pants and the fingers of his left hand were restlessly rubbing against the thumb. He was definitely nervous, and somehow that made Felicity nervous.

Clearing her throat, she called her loved ones’ attention on her. Immediately Oliver looked up at her and his face lightened up with a smile. Mae stepped back from the aquarium to run towards her.

“Mommy!”

Felicity lifted Mae into her arms, holding her close for a long moment. The girl pulled back, she nuzzled her mother’s nose.

“You’re wearing a pretty dress,” Felicity stated. “You look beautiful.”

“Thanks, mommy,” Madeleine answered with a smile. “Daddy said it’s okay to wear the dress because it’s a special day.”

“It’s a special day?” Felicity asked.

The little girl nodded enthusiastically. “It’s my birthday.”

Felicity chuckled, slowly starting to walk towards Oliver. “It’s not your birthday, honey. It’s still a little while until that.”

“How often do I have to sleep?”

“Twenty-eight times.”

Mae gasped for breath. “That’s a lot.”

“Yes, it is still awhile,” Felicity replied, nodding her head, before she turned towards Oliver. “Hey.”

“Hi,” Oliver replied, leaning down, and pecked her lips. “How was your day?”

“I feel like it will get a lot better now,” Felicity told him. “Nice suit by the way.”

“You will like to hear that there are suspenders under the jacket.”

“Oh, yes, this day just got a thousand times better,” she said. When Oliver winked at her, Felicity bit down on her bottom lip. She took a look around, taking in the romantic decoration with more rose petals and lanterns. There was a small table placed in the middle of the area with three chairs around. When she looked back at Oliver she found that he was still looking at her like he had done before. “What is all of this?”

“It’s… uhm…” Oliver replied, scratching the back of his head almost a little uncomfortably, “hopefully not too much?”

“Daddy’s nervous,” Mae whispered into Felicity’s ear.

“Daddy’s nervous? But he has no reason to be nervous, right? Because this is beautiful.”

“I told him so, too.”

“That’s good,” Felicity whispered to her daughter and pressed a kiss to her cheek.

Felicity looked back at Oliver. He smiled, but still seemed quite nervous. His fingers continued to rub against his thumb, and his breathing seemed to falter. When Felicity cocked her head slightly, he quickly cleared his throat and took Madeleine from her to set her back to the floor instead. He held their daughter’s much smaller hand in his, though.

“I think we should sit down,” Oliver suggested, gesturing towards the table.

Following Oliver’s suggestion, Felicity nodded and walked towards the table. He set the chair in place for her before he sat down on the opposite side of the table and pulled Madeleine onto his thighs.

Felicity felt her heartbeat quicken at the way Oliver looked at her. The expression in his eyes was intense. It was so intense Felicity almost felt like his gaze was burning right under her skin. There was a nervous flutter in the pit of her stomach, and the smile that was still playing on his lips infected her.

If she and Oliver weren’t so close and didn’t know each other as well as they did, this moment would probably be awkward. They just sat there, smiling at each other, and they probably both knew that something big was going to happen tonight. Yet neither of them said a word.

It had been years since Felicity had felt uncomfortable around Oliver the last time, though. They just knew each other deep in their bones. They had built a relationship of love, trust and honestly. There was no room for feeling really uncomfortable anymore.

“Mae and I want to ask you a question,” Oliver stated after awhile. He lowered his head to Madeleine’s ear, not breaking the eye contact with Felicity, and whispered loud enough for her to hear, “Now you ask her.”

“Mommy?”

“Yes, honey?”

“Can you marry daddy?” Mae asked and quickly shot a glance back over her shoulder to her daddy to make sure that she had done it right. When Oliver mouthed a soundless “please”, Mae turned back to her mother. Giving Felicity her best angel’s eyes, she added, “Please, mommy?”

Felicity felt her heart stumble a little bit in her chest. She didn’t know what she had expected of this evening. She probably should have expected this. Maybe she even had expected this because it was the next step, right? You dated, moved in together, got married and then had a baby. They had jumbled up the order, so actually getting married was the one step left to take now. Anyway, expecting that this moment was coming was something completely different than actually being in it.

“Now will you, mommy?” Mae asked. Her voice didn’t fail to make Felicity know how excited she was. “Will you marry daddy, please? Please, please, please.”

Oliver smiled at how eager their daughter was to make sure Felicity was really going to marry him. Felicity only chuckled quietly about it. Madeleine was great as persuading them into doing things she would like them to do.

“You know,” Felicity asked, biting back another chuckle, “I am wondering why daddy doesn’t ask me himself because he is a grown man.”

Felicity looked at Oliver playfully challenging. Part of her just wanted to give into the tears of joy that threatened to spring to her eyes, and she wanted fall into his arms with a sob, saying yes. That part would have to wait for a moment, though. Just a short moment.

She watched Oliver lean forward and whisper something into Mae’s ear. Felicity couldn’t hear what it was, so she just propped her head up onto her hand and waited. When Oliver pulled back from their daughter’s ear, he winked at Felicity with a smile.

“So?” Felicity asked, looking at Mae again. “Why didn’t daddy ask?”

“Daddy’s nervous,” Mae explained. “He thinks you might say no. And he said you can’t say no to me. You said so right after I was born.”

Felicity looked from Madeleine to Oliver, who nodded his head slightly with a smile on his lips she had only seen on him once which was when their daughter had been born. She vaguely remembered that she had said something like that she would never be able to say no to Mae. It really was only vaguely, though. She had never thought Oliver would remember.

He cleared his throat before he explained, “When Mae was born six years ago… well, at least almost six years ago you told me about those statistics. If they applied to us, I would leave within the next four weeks, right? Well, I won’t leave. I still love you. I still love Mae. I still love this life that we built.”

Felicity smiled, nodding slightly. Now she felt her throat growing tight and tears forming in her eyes no matter how much she tried to hold them back. The feeling only increased when Oliver reached out his hand for her on the table top. Her fingers were shaking slightly when she placed them in his open hand. Oliver squeezed them gently, smiling at her.

“I know things between us haven’t always been easy. We both made mistakes. We both got hurt,” he continued after awhile. “We always managed to find our way back to each other, though. We never really gave up, and we always… Well, we always managed to survive. We even beat the odds with still being together now. So I figured that… When I proposed to you seven years ago it was the wrong timing and it was for the wrong reasons. Now that’s not the case. I don’t want to marry you because people do that in certain situations or anything. I want to marry you because I love you, and I love our daughter. I know we already are a family, but I would still like to take this last step and to officially commit myself to you always and forever. I want to hold onto what we have because it makes me happier than anything else. So will you, Felicity Smoak, make me the happiest man on the face of the earth?”

Felicity didn’t trust her voice to get out a sound, so she just nodded. She tried to hold back the tears and the sob she felt building in her throat. She hadn’t thought she would react like this. She had known, logically, that this step was going to come one day soon. She had expected it and thought through it and tried to prepare herself for it. She had known in the back of her mind that there was no way to really prepare herself for the emotions that were elicited by a moment like this. If the last years had proven anything, it was that as much of as a logically thinking person she was, there was no way to always see things logically.

“Just to make sure,” Oliver said, narrowing his eyes at her slightly, “that is a yes, yes?”

Still not trusting her voice, Felicity quickly got up from her chair, pulled Madeleine from Oliver’s lap into her arms, so she could sit down on Oliver’s thighs with Mae in her arms instead. Not wasting a second, she pressed her lips to Oliver’s in an almost desperate kiss.

“Yes,” Felicity sobbed as soon as their lips broke apart. “I absolutely want to officially commit myself to you always and forever.”

“So you want to marry daddy?” Mae asked, not completely understanding her parent’s conversation.

Felicity cleared her throat, quickly wiping away some tears from her cheeks, before she looked at her daughter. “Well, since it was you asking, I’ll do it.”

“Cool,” Madeleine said with a smile that spread all over her face.

“You’re happy about that?”

“Yes,” Mae said, nodding her head. She quickly turned to Oliver, tugging at the lapel of his jacket. “Give mommy the ring now, daddy!”

“Oh right, the ring.”

Mae sighed, looking at Felicity. “He always forgets the ring.”

“Always? How many women did the two of you propose to lately?” she asked with a chuckle, tapping the tip of her daughter’s nose.

“Just you, mommy,” Mae answered immediately. “We just practiced a lot, so it would be perfect.”

“Oh, it was perfect,” Felicity replied. “You both have done this really great.”

“Me, too?”

“Yes, you too.”

Oliver cleared his throat, calling his ladies’ attention on him. He held a little box in his hand.

“Mae, do you want to show mommy the ring?”

“No, you do that, daddy.”

Oliver opened the box, revealing the ring inside. It was a delicate, white gold ring with a princess shaped diamond.

“It’s beautiful,” Felicity whispered.

“I helped choosing it,” Madeleine hurried to say. “Daddy, you have to slide it onto mommy’s finger now.”

“Well, if you say so,” Oliver replied. He took Felicity’s left hand and put the ring onto her finger. He lifted her hand to his lips, kissing the knuckles before he turned to Mae. “Honey, can you give mommy and daddy a minute alone?”

“Okay,” she said. “I will go to look at the octopus again.”

She slid off her mother’s lap and quickly ran to the aquarium without looking back. Oliver tightened his hold on Felicity, and she rested her cheek against the crown of his head with sigh. She enjoyed the quiet moment, varying to look between their daughter and the ring on her finger.

“Thank you for all of this,” she whispered against Oliver’s hair. “It’s really perfect. And I would have said yes, no matter if it had been you or Mae asking.”

“I know,” Oliver said with a chuckle. “But I thought I shouldn’t take the risk.”

“There was none,” Felicity replied. She pulled back enough to lock eyes with Oliver. “You could have asked me while we were brushing teeth, and I still would have said yes.”

“Yes, tell me what a waste all the work I put into this was,” Oliver teased her with a chuckle. “That is a nice way to be grateful.”

Chuckling, Felicity leaned down and kissed him. She framed his face with her hands, gently stroking her thumbs through the short stubble on his cheeks. When she pulled back, she locked eyes with him.

“All of this is really beautiful,” Felicity replied, gesturing around, “and I really appreciate all the work you put into this. The fact that you chose the Aquarium of all places… it was always ours even in the very beginning. All I am trying to say is that I didn’t say yes because of this romantic gesture, but because you and me together forever is an idea I really love.”

“No doubts?” Oliver asked, slightly cocking his head. “No fear that anything could go wrong?”

Felicity smiled, shaking her head. “No, I don’t know what should go wrong. I mean… even if things go wrong and they might go wrong because life has never really been easy on us, I know that we can survive. Like you said before, we always survive. So no doubts, no fear about this decision.” Felicity made a pause before she added, “We’ve come a long way, didn’t we?”

“It’s amazing,” Oliver agreed. “You are amazing. And I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

Their lips met in another gentle kiss. Oliver’s tongue traced her bottom lip, opening her mouth up to him. Gently he moved his tongue against hers and scraped his teeth over her lip.

“Can I come back now?”

Chuckling, they broke apart. Oliver turned his head towards their daughter, spreading his arms. “Come here, Mae.”

Madeleine came running towards her parents and quickly climbed back into Felicity’s lap. Oliver pulled both of them in a tight hug, firmly keeping them against him. Felicity rested her cheek against the crown of his head and watched her left hand with the engagement ring on Madeleine’s back.

They really had come a long, complicated, bumpy way. They had made it, though, and at the end there was nothing more important than that. They were all together and happy. And now they would make their family as official as possible. Finally.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for everyone who supported this fic. I am still amazed by the response it received. 
> 
> Maybe we will see each other for the sequels. :)


End file.
